This week, we have three American diva’s that are crying out for the Nobody’s Perfect award: Paris Hilton, Lindsey Lohan, and Katy Perry.
Did you really want me to talk about Obamacare? I didn’t think so.
First up, we have Paris Hilton, whose only goal in life is to…party, and Lindsey Lohan, whose only goal in life is to..party. You would THINK they would love each other…
But..not anymore. It seems Paris’s brother, Barron Hilton (The Hilton’s like to name their kids properly.) was at a Miami mansion, and said something rather nasty about Lohan, and then Lindsey ordered someone to beat him up. You have to wonder if this was a knockout warm-up or if Barron is just short.
Paris was so mad she posted this in Instagram:
“They both will pay for what they did. No one f—-with my family and gets away with it!! And that she should “watch her back. “
Lindsey then had this to say:
“You talk s— about me to my boyfriend, this is what you get.”
And then there’s the woman who used to be married to the greatest pop socialist of the last decade— Russell Brand: Katy Perry. Just the fact that she married him, should tell you all you need to know about her lack of mental floss.
It seem Katy, in an interview, said that she didn’t let her parents go and watch her sing at President Obama’s inauguration last January, because they were Republicans and did not vote for Obama.
As Perry tells it, her parents met when Mary, “a pot-smoking debutante” and freelance journalist, was covering a tent revival in Las Vegas, which Keith, an acid-dropping hippie turned preacher, was attending. “People don’t understand that I have a great relationship with my parents—like, how that can exist,” she says. “There isn’t any judgment. They don’t necessarily agree with everything I do, but I don’t necessarily agree with everything they do. They’re at peace with—they pray for me is what they do. They’re fascinated with the idea that they created someone who has this much attention on her. My parents are Republicans, and I’m not. They didn’t vote for Obama, but when I was asked to sing at the inauguration, they were like, ‘We can come.’ And I was like, ‘No, you can’t. I love you so much, but that—on principle.’ They understood, but I was like, ‘How dare you?’ in a way.”
How dare they? How DARE they want to go to the Capitol (which they help pay for with taxes) to watch their daughter sing (whom they FED from the time she was a baby) even though they didn’t vote for Obama? (Who they also pay his salary by their federally stolen taxes.) How DARE they?
(Cough) if ONLY they were still pot-smoking acid-dropping hippies again, I bet they could have gone.
Okay: maybe we should take a vote on this one:
All who think that Paris Hilton and Lindsey Lohan are basically acting like spoiled diva thugs, with little class and not much brains…raise your hands.
All who think that Katy Perry’s rudeness to her own parents, not to mention, the lack of ANY kind of simple understanding of our rights as Americans…raise your hand.
I’m going with Dolly Parton! She recently stuck up for Miley Cyrus’s porn inspiring twerking. Good lord Dolly...as if she needed your help. Did your coat of many colors get lost at the local laundry mat in East St. Louis?
So far, I haven’t seen Paris OR Lindsey twerk at all. Okay. Almost…but not like Miley.
But then again, the year’s not over yet. If Dolly starts twerking— I’m never listening to “I will Always Love You.’ ever again.
It’s been a common decision in our house: If you are a movie star, and you decide to put down the common folks who spend the big money to go see your movies, then we don’t have to give you our money.
Stallone, has been getting on my nerves lately. Yo Rocky…What happened to you? Too many punches in the head?
Stallone has made most of his money simply because he has appealed to the conservative Americans. Rocky was all about individual hard work and the theme that, in America, you CAN be the champ if you work hard enough. And he went on to milk the American’s are really good guys themes…in fact he has always had those themes running throughout his movies. It’s the REASON they were successful.
And yet, when he talks on his own time, he sounds like a wimpy liberal kiss-ass Obama puppet. During the Trayvon Martin trail, he said no Americans needed to own a gun.
Gee..can the word hypocrisy get any bigger?
Stallone gleefully announced yesterday that Willis had been booted from “The Expendables” summer franchise, calling him a greedy, lazy jerk. The “Rocky” actor tweeted: “WILLIS OUT… HARRISON FORD IN !!!! GREAT NEWS !!!!! Been waiting years for this!!!!” Not satisfied with simply showing Willis the door, Stallone added this parting Twitter shot: “GREEDY AND LAZY …… A SURE FORMULA FOR CAREER FAILURE.”
Are these guys that stupid? Does Stallone think that the people who go to see his movies, are going to want to fork out money to see the liberal lover Harrison Ford?
Sly might be in for a surprise. In fact, the whole movie industry is in shock..NOBODY IS GOING TO THE Movies! Spielberg has even predicted the industry won’t be able to survive.
And it’s has much more to do with rebellion than content. It’s not just the movies that are suffering…the cities newspapers are falling like dead flies off an electrical grid. The Boston Globe and the Washington Post were recently sold at a loss, and I’m waiting for the Post Dispatch to go, because they almost have to give it away here in St. Louis.
So, what’s up?
Rush Limbaugh had it right today….the real reason the newspapers (and the movies) are going out of business is because people, like me, were sick of opening up their morning paper and seeing whole pages devoted to some poor African village starving, and how horrible America was in not sending the world all its money.
The leftist Marxist took over all the newspapers in America, the people stopped buying them, and they wonder why.
It’s the same reason the movies are bombing…
Hey, I’ll stay home and watch reruns of Tom Selleck as Jesse Stone, who I know is a patriot, rather than spend money on Sylvester Stallone blowing up another village in some third world country, all the while saying in real life, he doesn’t believe in that sort of thing.
I thought the first Expendables was great—But I will never pay to see another movie of Sly Stone’s no matter how much I want to.
The man, is a coward, a fraud, and an American sellout. Let him move to China.
Nobody Wins when Hollywood is just another mouthpiece for government propaganda. Sorry Sly—I doubt that Bruce Willis’s career will suffer.
Want to hear some fun news? Lady Gaga it seems, is either too worn out from dancing around every day, or she doesn’t want to trip once again in her 8-inch high heels. She is being carted around in a wheelchair…and not just any wheelchair.
From Luxury News:
The celebrated pop-star was spotted at Chicago on her 27th birthday – 28th March, and the night after, both times in her Louis Vuitton wheelchair! Seemingly, the LV wheelchair is not the only luxury wheelchair Gaga owns. She also has another in 24-karat created by Mordekai designer Ken Borochov. The Louis Vuitton wheelchair is a posh piece with chocolate-colored seating along with the monogrammed LV initials, a wooden hand rest and black body.
But that’s not where the good news ends. Gaga had a very rich gay guy drawing Gaga her very own birthday card:
Karl Lagerfeld has put his pen to paper, not to sketch an outfit for Lady Gaga, but to wish her ‘Happy Birthday’! The head of the fashion house Chanel poured his wishes on a piece of paper by sketching a portrait of Gaga wearing sunglasses and her golden locks falling over her shoulders.
Who else would tell you such important things?
Actually, I was looking for an excuse NOT to go vote against another tax raises for our broke city, because NOBODY ever votes these things down but me.
Should I waste my time voting no?
I haven’t decided yet. What would Lady Gaga do?
In case everyone forgot, here’s the video of Oprah crying at Obama’s coming out Greek ceremony in 2008. What is so very AMAZING is the fact that Oprah…the RICHEST women in the United States, and yes…uh..she is…uh..BLACK…she could not believe that a black man would become President.
Either she is stupid, a hypocrite, getting paid to support Obama, or when she looks in the mirror, she sees a white person. That “black” face is the richest women in America. No white person held HER back.
Tell me Mr. President…Who helped Oprah build HER empire. She didn’t build her own riches?
Nobody Wonders if Oprah will make an appearance at the Democratic Convention this year. She helped push Obama into the Presidency. Will she do it again?
Or…is she one of the 1% that Obama is going to Tax?
Nobody Knows…but if she does appear, I think we are going to need a bigger chair.
This week we have two very important world figures trying to take the spotlight with their grievances, Jimmy Carter and Elmo. I was going to go for Cher this week, because she keeps ranting that the Tea Party people are all racist… but…why? Elmo at this point is much more interesting.
Let’s start with that pontificating putterer, x-President Jimmy Carter, who no doubt is still wondering if we have aliens on the planet, because he is looking for the Carter family tree. I’m convinced he could be of alien descent because I can’t think of any recent x President that dislikes America as much as he does.
Notice I said X American President.
Carter is STILL knocking America…and that’s because America threw him out of office because he put on his sweater one day in the Oval Office, looked the American people straight in the eye, and told America to turn down their thermostats and get out our ugliest sweaters, because we were basically all energy hogs and it was our fault (not his) that we had to wait in long lines to get gas.
It didn’t go over too well.
Once Ronald Reagan came to save the day, we couldn’t WAIT for Jimmy to go back to his peanut farm. But did he? Nooooooo, he had to continue to torture us with all his opinions…like how the election of Hugo Chavez was a good one. Once Jimmy Carter agreed to do an interview in Playboy, Nobody thought that if there were any redeeming qualities Jimmy might have had…class was not one of them. He has been one of the noisiest and litigious pathological anti American President ever to grace the Oval Office, but..yesterday–he just might have gone too far.
He is now attacking Obama…Lions and Tiger and Bears…OH MY!
Jimmy Carter, America’s 39 the president, denounced the Obama administration for “clearly violating” 10 of the 30 articles of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, writing in a New York Times op-ed on Monday that the “United States is abandoning its role as the global champion of human rights. In addition to the drone strikes, Carter criticized the current president for keeping the Guantanamo Bay detention center open, where prisoners “have been tortured by water boarding more than 100 times or intimidated with semiautomatic weapons, power drills or threats to sexually assault their mothers.”
Notice the words “intimidated.”
Actually, if a Muslim really believed that some American soldier was really going to sexually assault their mother, then he deserved to be water boarded for stupidity alone.
And even though Jimmy has protected Muslims all over the world, this time he has maybe stepped over the…x -tow the Party democratic line.
And then there’s Elmo. Evidently Elmo is claiming that the Jews are ruining the world, (see video) something Mel Gibson once said to a cop. So many kids were around while Elmo was losing his mind trying to tell people that the Jews were taking over, a guy in another stupid costume had to get him to shut up.
How do you compare? I can’t. Both of them are stupid.
And speaking of stupid—Kim Kardashion had this to say about herself and the Virgin Mary:
“I think if I’m 40 and I don’t have any kids and I’m not married, I would have a baby artificially inseminated, I would feel like Mary — like Jesus is my baby. When I did want to have sex the first time, I was almost 15,” she told Winfrey — just like the Virgin Mary said in the Gospel of Matthew.
She told this to Oprah. Word has not come in if she was on drugs, or if the Catholic Church might be considering working with Kim to redo the Virgin Mary statues with Kim Kardashion statues ..or not. Somehow Kim completely missed the point that you have to be a VIRGIN to be Mary.
I’m beginning to think I should have compared Cher to Kim this week: The Botox Devil and the Virgin Mary.
Still somewhere I just know, that Jimmy Carter has lusted for them both.
Therefore, Elmo wins by default. Congratulations Elmo! Jimmy Carter and Egypt await you.
In Hollywood, if you’re not a democrat, you are pretty much run out-of-town, and very few comedians can ignore an election year. Let’s compare shall we, three comedians and their opinions about Obama, and see which one is the MOST perfect:
FIRST: Joan Rivers…never met a liposuction she didn’t want, or an ugly dress she could ignore. Here she critiques the ongoing Republican race for the White House, and notice, when she finally criticizes Obama, Jane Lynch comes in to defend his gray hair. (?)
And then they both “bond” in their feminists glory of being born with uteruses…as if the man has no rights…He’s just a sperm walking–and then they go into the sex jokes…
I’m beginning to think they don’t have any…sex that is. I still like Joan Rivers, but she deserves to stay on the women’s channels, where she can talk about sex changes and viagra to her hearts content.
SECOND: You don’t go on David Letterman and cut down Obama, but that’s exactly what Don Rickles did…and when the Liberal audience was offended, he didn’t care. I’d say, Don Rickles has one up on Joan Rivers, in fact, Nobody would like better than to see Don Rickles tell a few Obama jokes to Joan Rivers.
THIRD: I saved the best for last. John Lovitz is a hilarious actor. His portrayal in the Wedding Singer of a band disco singer was so true to life, I almost couldn’t believe he was not some of the people I’ve seen on karaoke stages. But here, he really lets it go here, about how unfair it is to work hard, and then have a President who wants to take it away.
Lovitz wins the “Nobody’s Perfect, but You’re Pretty Close Award” for the week. This Nobody has now become an even BIGGER fan, and even Lovitz says the offers are pouring in from everywhere.
The contest—- wasn’t even close.
Nobody Gets Email
Here’s one that is going to delight you: and let me tell you why. I got this email, read the story and thought it was a hoot. But, because one of my readers is really a sharp cookie and keeps me on my toes, (dandapani) I called the number.
It’s real..that is the steakhouse, there really is a steakhouse in Montana called Oasis— but the story..is NOT true according to the lady that answered the phone.
Still, it’s a great story isn’t it?
The radio station America FM was doing one of its ‘Is Anyone Listening?’ bits this morning. The first question was; ‘Ever have a celebrity come up with the ‘Do you know who I am?‘ routine?’ A woman called in and said that a few years ago, whle visiting her cattle rancher in Billings, MT, she had occasion to go to dinner at a restaurant that does not take reservations. The wait was about 45 minutes: may local ranchers and their wives were waiting. Ted Turner and his ex-wife Jane Fonda came in the restaurant and wanted a table.
The hostess informed them that they’d have to wait 45 minutes. Jane Fonda asked the hostess, ‘Do you know who I am?”
The hostess answered, ‘Yes, but you’ll have to wait 45 minutes.’ Then Jane asked if the manager was in. When the manager came out, he asked, “May I help you?” “Do you know who we are?” both Ted and Jane asked. “Yes, but these folks have been waiting, and I can’t put you ahead of them.” Then Ted asked to speak to the owner. The owner came out, and Jane again asked, ‘Do you know who I am?’
The owner answered, ‘Yes, I do. Do you know who I am? I am the owner of this restaurant and I am a Vietnam Veteran. Not only will you not get a table ahead of my friends and neighbors who have been waiting here, but you will also not be eating in my restaurant tonight or any other night. Good bye.’
Only in America, is this a great country or what? To all who received this, this is a true story and the name of the steak house is: Sir Scott’s Oasis Steakhouse, 204 W. Main, Manhattan, MT 59741, 406
If you ever get there, give this fellow a sharp salute, buy a steak, and tip the waitress. They have ten steaks on their simple menu from 32 oz. to 13 oz. Toothpicks on every table.
No…that wasn’t the question. The real question the pampered ladies of the view wanted to know was:
“Which Kardashian got married for just a short time?”
“Kim.” said the ‘President.’
Yes. And that’s why the more important TV interview that all of America should have paid attention to instead, was last night’s Tonight Show with Jay Leno. Kim, Kourtney, and Khloe Kardashian were his first guests.
Nobody wants to admit this, I’ve never actually watched a Kardashian show. I did think that Kim really pulled off a fantastic scam with the whole “I’m just getting married to let the world adore me in a wedding dress and make a big bundle of money on it.” last year. But, I’ve really never heard her talk until last night.
Obviously, someone besides Kim is controlling her career. I was having trouble getting past her really big butt…when she started talking about how once she babysat her nephew and the baby had to tell her what to do to change his diaper.
I don’t think she was making that up.
If not for the fact that I could not stop starting at how big that butt spread out like a giant whoopee cushion on that chair, I would have changed the channel..but then, Donny Deutsch came on.
Now, Donny used to have a program on MSNBC called The Big Idea with Donny Deutsch. He claimed to be there to help entrepreneurs, but MSNBC fired him for including Keith Olbermann, right up there with Rush Limbaugh, Bill O’Reilly, and Glenn Beck, for being “the biggest hate-mongers in television.”
Don’t know who he is? Wikipedia says:
Deutsch is the chairman of Deutsch Inc., an advertising agency founded by his father, which he sold to the Interpublic Group of Companies in 2000 for $265 million. In addition to his work on The Big Idea with Donny Deutsch, Deutsch has appeared as a regular guest on MSNBC‘s morning talk show Morning Joe.
“Why the fascination [with Palin]? It’s very simple and I’m not going to be glib here. She is Snooki. It’s the same math,” Deutsch said. “A younger generation they want to watch this character with big hair who’s funny…you never know she’s going to say. It’s no different but for a higher demographic! We watch her she’s interesting looking…What’s she going to say? She’s campy, she’s kitschy, it’s telegenic, its television, its entertainment that’s the fascination, beginning, middle and end of story, she’s Snooki.”
Yes, If you want to know why the country is in such deep trouble, it’s because people like the Kardashian sisters, who couldn’t change a diaper even if the world depended on it, don’t give politics much thought—or idiots like Donny Deutsch, believe Obama should be reelected on his good looks along.
Donny thinks looks and charm ARE the key to a good President. This from a man, who compares Sarah Palin to Snooki, but thinks any of the Kardashian sisters would make his day if they ran for Vice President.
So, Nobody Wonders if Jay Leno did this on purpose…put four Deutsch bag Obama airhead lovers on stage at the same time to show the world how really stupid America Movie Stars are:
But then, the real people already know that….we found that out from listening to George Clooney. These are not real people….they are Obama Nanny Dolls.
The reason Obama won the last election, according to many, was due to the fact that he got all those kids who had never voted in their life, to go out and vote. Some of them couldn’t even read, but there you go. We have just witnessed in the last month how Obama is going to “save” the poor, mistreated, left alone to suffer without him—American woman, and NOW he is going back after the young “students.”
So, when the obsequious Jimmy Fallon rehearsed a very hip and young way to catch all those college students, (and blacks) who we know from watching Jay Leno’s “walks” are pretty stupid, (see video) the young and stupid will think this President is really “cool” after watching this very slick advertisement for Obama made up especially for the POTUS.
After all, most of them haven’t got out into the real world yet. They don’t realized that the reason college is so expensive is due to the government
This from The Godfather:
It’s unfortunate that most college students rarely get a free market approach to economics. This is by design. Colleges are dependent on tax dollars. Even private colleges are subsidized by students who bring money they got from the government in the form of guaranteed government loans and grants.There’s another part to the story that is often missed. The rising cost of college is the direct result of government subsidizing education. Women trapped in welfare programs have little choice but to continue to vote for the political party that promises to maintain the programs. Republicans capitulate by going along with the Democrats so they won’t be vilified by the press and the always aggressive liberals. Their debt after graduation — now at $1 trillion and more than all credit card debt — makes them dependent on the State.
So it’s the same as gettng the single mother voting Democrat forever. Put the ‘students’ on that same dependent bandwagon.
I stopped watching Jimmy Fallon when he made parents send in video tapes of them lying to their own children about taking away their Christmas presents and then laughing when the kids started crying.
And right now, he is the Obama’s obsequious butt-boy. Literally. Jimmy and Michelle have done pushups in the White house, and he has even made a pack with the dog. Next thing you know, he will be in the White House garden picking tomatoes with the kids.
Jimmy is being used to “slow-jam” Obama down our kids throats (Kids being anywhere from 19-55) …and have them love it while they do.
Jimmy insulted Michelle Bachman when the band played “The Bitch is Lying” as she walked out as a guest on his show. He denied knowing about it.
Nobody Knows how much money Jimmy is making to be Ba–’RACK’s: (What’s with the new promunciation there Mr. Obama?) personal campaign manager for the young…but one thing I do know…
“Knowing is not enough. Willing is not enough: we must do. —Bruce Lee
Like many young girls growing up all over the world, I usually had a crush on some famous guy when there wasn’t a man in my life. My first big one was Paul McCartney. I always baked a cake for him when it was his birthday, and since it was a day after mine, I got double-dipped in two big chocolate cakes!
But, the smartest and longest crush I ever had was on Bruce Lee. At first, I was attracted to Bruce for his movies of course….but unlike the movies of today, when Bruce Lee beat up ten guys at once, you could believe that the man could actually do it. At the time, I saw every Bruce Lee movie, read
every book, and had the usual Bruce Lee posters on my wall. I wanted to be Bruce Lee, or at least get my life up to some kind of better standard.
Another reason I liked the guy was his grace. I had been a professional dancer at one time, I had just quit my job teaching at Arthur Murray’s (long story) when I noticed this man. How could anyone be so graceful when fighting? Watch any man doing Martial arts and they look clumsy. Crude. Not Bruce…Bruce ‘s body was as graceful as a gazelle in flight. I have yet to see any man look as good when they were fighting. (Being Cha-Cha Campion of Hong Kong might have helped.)
Bruce not only danced in his body and moves, he danced in his mind. Like any true artist his creativity was endless. I won’t go into the many wonders of Bruce Lee here, but I will tell you, that years later, my grown-up son bought me a framed photograph of Bruce Lee to go in my Japanese decorated front dining room, years after I had forgotten all about the man.
Then I remembered: I used to make my son watch all the Bruce Lee movies with me when he was a kid, and I often wonder if it’s one of the reasons he became a personal trainer.
So, let’s remember Bruce Lee…here’s one of my favorite passages in his own words, and think while you’re reading this if the whole world couldn’t learn something more from Bruce Lee: It was an introduction he gave before he began to teach you his art.
“Make this article relate to yourself because, though it is on JKD, it is primarily concerned with the blossoming of a martial artist not a “Chinese” martial artist or a “Japanese” martial artist. A martial artist is a human being first. Just as nationalities have nothing to do with one’s humanity, so they have nothing to do with the martial arts. Leave your protective shell of isolation and relate directly to what is being said. Return to your senses by ceasing all the intervening intellectual mumbo jumbo. Remember that life is a constant process of relating. Remember too that I seek neither your approval nor to influence you toward my way of thinking. I will be more than satisfied if, as a result of this article, you begin to investigate everything for yourself and cease to uncritically accept prescribed formulas that dictate “this is this” and ”that is that. “