Joyanna Adams

Nobody's Opinion

Woman To Have Quadruplets at 65? Whoa.

Nobody Flashes: 

Annegret Raunigk of Germany, needs some kind of medal for being determined to have four kids at once. To most of the human race, one child at a time is plenty, but for Annegret Raunigk, four is not problem:

“I’m not actually afraid. I simply assume I’ll remain healthy and fit. In matters of organization I have enough experience, that’s not new for me,” she said.

Why don’t we hire Annegret to come over and run the IRS?

But…raising a lot of kids is not new…she’s had plenty of practice:

Berlin (AFP) – A 65-year-old Berlin woman who already has 13 children is pregnant again with quadruplets, Germany’s RTL broadcaster reported Sunday.

The Russian and English teacher’s pregnancy follows several attempts abroad at artificial insemination over the last year-and-a-half, according to the private TV channel.

The woman, Annegret Raunigk, decided to try to have another child because her youngest daughter, who is nine, wanted a little brother or sister.

woman family

Mother in front

Nobody wants to know, who paid for the artificial insemination and how can she afford all those kids? Is she married to an Audi Engineer? Or does the German state support them all?

The article didn’t say. It also didn’t say what will happen to the four newborns if Annegret dies in five years.

Obviously, it will not be a problem…something tells me the other “kids” are doing a lot of the work already, and mom knows that.

Most women at 65 are thinking about raising tomatoes, not Annegret. O.K. She’s done a great job at bringing babies into the world, and that’s a good thing.

But…is her house German clean? Hope so..that’s a lot of diapers.

 

April 13, 2015 Posted by | Life, Uncategorized | | Leave a comment

Nobody Flashes: Ten People…Who Beat the Odds

Nobody Flashes

I watched this and thought the 3rd guy was a riot.

Here are ten people who survived the impossible…which leads to the next question: Will there be ten conservatives in America who even survive Obama?

Enjoy!

April 11, 2015 Posted by | Life, Uncategorized | | Leave a comment

Andreas Lubitz was MORE Than Depressed, He Was a Murderer.

 

Nobody Wins

Here’s the question: What makes a man, who is suffering from depression, fly a plane into a mountain on a day he just can’t take his life anymore and kill 150 innocent people along with him?

It’s one thing to hate your own life..but why kill other people just because you feel like shit?Pilot

Here’s what I’ve read so far about Andreas Lubitz’s, the co-pilot that took a dive into the Swiss Alps while flying an Airbus, and rather enjoyed it.

First: It was well-known to psychiatrists that he had a tendency to suffer from depression, and still, they just gave him a note to tell him not to fly? Shouldn’t they have given that note to his bosses?

Why do the psychiatrists get off so easy in this? They make damn good money, and they should know more about the fact that MEN will react to the chemicals and life situations in their brains in a more violent way than women. Testosterone rules. They’re men. Going out with a bang is very exciting.

It’s one thing to not be held responsible if the person kills himself, but I do believe, that psychiatrist that examine employees that hold other people lives in their hands…train conductors, bus drivers, and Muslims in the army wanting to see “Allah”,should be at least fined for not reporting a danger when they see one.

This…oh…we didn’t see it coming is BS. Get out of the profession then.

Second: Pilots should have bathrooms in the cockpit.

Third: Too many drugs given to treat depression just make some people much worse. Every human is different, and much like the fact that the cops can’t always be around to protect you, more people who suffer from depression should be given more help in knowing how to deal with themselves WHEN they get suicidal. They must realize the threat they pose to those around them and take responsibility.

There ARE tricks that can be taught…for instance knowing that when they are feeling like killing a lot of people….they should remind themselves repeatedly…YOU ARE OUT OF YOUR FRIGGING MIND…it’s okay, your brain is in imbalance. You are insane right now…it’s okay. It will pass.

Go take a shower. Go run. Get out of your own head. Most of all…have someone you can reach to help you, even if it’s suicide prevention.

Fourth: I have read reports that they had found gay porn on his website, he was visiting Mosques, his girlfriend was pregnant, his eyesight was going, he had no future…all simple guesses as to why this guy would want to kill all those people. His girlfriend said:

“He did it because he realized that because of his health problems his big dream of a job with Lufthansa; a job as captain and as a long haul pilot was as good as impossible.”

And lastly: He was not just depressed: he was a murderer. Lots of depressed people walk the earth in pain and hurt no one but themselves. Murder adds a whole other mental disorder to the equation.

So, I can’t forgive him. Enough pity already for the man. Pity the poor relatives of the people who were on that plane.

Nobody Wins when psychopaths get in positions of power where they can do the most harm…

Crashing the plane (or a nation) then becomes, an option.Plane crash

 

April 1, 2015 Posted by | Life, Uncategorized | , | 8 Comments

Nobody’s Email: Andy Rooney’s Lessons of Life

Nobody Gets Email

It’s been long time since I’ve stepped into any church, but I would probably go more often, if the preachers would say more of things like this gems from Andy Rooney:Andy Rooney 2

It’s fitting wisdom for a Sunday, don’t you think?

(Thanks to J.R.)


Written by the  late Andy Rooney (ex-60 Minutes USA), a man with whom I also disagreed sometimes,  had the gift of saying so much with so few words. These are some of those words I think are worth repeating.

I’ve learned…. That the best classroom in the world is at the feet  of an elderly person.child asleep

I’ve learned…. That just one person saying to me, ‘You’ve made my  day!’ makes my day.

I’ve learned…. That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I’ve learned…. That being kind is more important than being right.

I’ve learned…. That you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I’ve learned…. That no  matter how serious your life requires you to be,  everyone needs a friend to act

goofy with.

I’ve learned…. That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold  and a heart to understand.Goofy

I’ve learned…. That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child

did wonders for me as an adult.

I’ve learned…. That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I’ve learned…. That money doesn’t buy class.

Classless

Classless

I’ve learned…. That  it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I’ve learned… That under everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I’ve learned…. That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I’ve learned…. That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to

hurt you.

I’ve learned…. That love, not time, heals all wounds.

I’ve learned…. That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter

than I am.dog smiling

I’ve learned…. That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

I’ve learned… That life is tough, but I’m tougher.

I’ve learned…. That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.

I’ve learned…. That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

I’ve learned…. That I wish I could have told my Mum and Dad that I love them one more time before

passed away.

I’ve learned…. That one should keep his words both soft and tender,  because tomorrow he may have to

eat them.

I’ve learned…. That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I’ve learned…. That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you’re

hooked for life.

I’ve learned…. That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth

occurs while you’re climbing it.

I’ve learned…. That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

March 28, 2015 Posted by | Life, Uncategorized | | 2 Comments

The Colonoscopy Question: To Resuscitate, or Not to Resuscitate?

Nobody’s Perfectcolon four

“Human have gotten along millions of years without colonoscopies, I just don’t understand why all of a sudden, you must have a test when nothing is wrong…I mean, why have a procedure that is unnecessary when you feel perfectly fine…especially when you COULD die from it?” I said.

My doctor, just shook his head. Every year, I would go into his office, and every year, he would tell me I should get a colonoscopy. He was PUSHING it. I imagined him making some kind of kickback….It’s not that I didn’t want to experience the pain, after all, I’d gone through a Caesarean, where you wake up and realized that oh..they DID cut through seven layers of muscle…stomach muscles you DO need to walk, who knew? I still remember trying to walk out of the parking lot to the children’s hospital where my newly born son was lying in an incubator…it took me about an hour just to get to the elevator.

…and gall bladder removal, where you realized that nobody will tell you that without the gall bladder, food actually travels at the speed of light through your body, the gall bladder acting as a traffic stoplight…even a snickers candy bar would go into my mouth and come out in a matter of minutes.

And they say the gall bladder is useless. THEY LIE! I was always calling up doctors and saying, “What is this green stuff coming out of me!” Nobody knew. It took a year for the alien gall bladder bile to disappear into probably some other organ in my body— like my ears. I should have called Steven Spielberg.

And most painful of all…I’ve had countless tooth infections, and root canals. Imagine what it must have been like before dentists? Pulling a tooth without Novocaine? Who knows how many wars were started by Kings with serious tooth decay?

What I wanted was my doctor to give me statistics. “Google it.” he said, as I saw him getting madder by the minute. Frustrated. Then he let it out. One of his patients was a mere 40 years old. He had cancer throughout his colon and didn’t even know it. He died. If he had gotten a colonoscopy, he would have lived. He didn’t want me to blame HIM if I had gotten colon cancer.colonoscopy

“Why in the WORLD would I blame you for the colonoscopy that I didn’t get?” I asked.

I guess his other patient did.

But, my real fears came from what I had heard, late at night on the radio. The radio host was really upset about his best friend, who had gone in for a routine colonoscopy, and was now, DYING…in a hospital. And this radio host talked about that for the next week. As far as I know, he is still there…punctured by some evil needle that couldn’t find its way back to the hole it came through.

Stuck. Blood oozing out all over his liver.

Surely, that would be my luck, I thought to myself. Out of the thousands, it would be me.

Even after reading Dave Barry’s famous colonoscopy column (Google it) I just thought..it’s all so unnecessary. O

And then, my wisest and dearest friend told me….do it. And so, I made the appointment.

Can’t be so hard, right?

As the day approached, I didn’t tell any of my friends. I didn’t want to jinx it.

Of course—there were papers that you had to sign….and then I saw it—there it was:

“Death COULD happen to you. ” sign here and relieve us of any charges.

I knew it. ..that mention of death again. They didn’t tell me that when I got my gall bladder surgery.

More directions: Don’t eat popcorn, hard fruit, raw vegetables and do not eat the day before AT ALL.colon two

Drink all you want, and then pour this bottle of stuff in a glass and drink three 16 ounce glasses of whatever you want— but you do this all in just one hour.

You MUST drink all three glasses. And cool…you could mix this laxative stuff with any drink you like. I had SEEN what Coke could do in science class…you can launch a rocket with coke and Alka- seltzer, so I figured, Coke. That will clean ANYTHING out. It works great on car engines.  If I’m going to do this, I want to use the most lethal soda on the planet.

Sounds easy right? It’s not. That night, I read two whole books in the bathroom. ….and

The next morning, zombie eyed..you do the same procedure all over again.

I had basically bloated my body with so much water, I could have passed as a floatation device in the nearest ocean.

I went into the office at after noon. I felt at least six months pregnant. My stomach was holding a water baby.  As I walked into the office, the admitting nurse was curt:

“Come with me, you have to sign some forms.”

After signing about 1,345 more papers, the nurse looked at me and said…

“Do you want to be resuscitated?”

“What? Is this a trick question?” I asked.

“Do you want to be resuscitated?” she asked again.colon three

Okay. Now. This was the real reason I didn’t want to be her in the first place, and so, I was right! I could die on that table, and they would look down at the paper I had just signed and say…

“Well, it says here, she doesn’t want to be resuscitated.”

“NEXT! “

I’m not kidding.

As they reeled me into the room, I looked at the doctor and said,

“I’m scared.”

“I was my first time too,” he said. Meaning, the doctor had had more than one.

Great. Just knock me out. Which they gloriously did. That IS the best moment. They should bottle THAT stuff and sell it on the open market.

As I woke up, the doctor came right in…and so, nothing was wrong. They found a perfectly healthy and exceedingly CLEAN colon to which the doctor was very happy, as I’m sure he was, if you could have seen some of the people who were waiting n the waiting room…I was quick and easy. I wondered if I would have gotten such a clean as a whistle colon HAD I still had my gall bladder.

Was this the happy ending to the story?

Well…there is one thing they don’t tell you. And it’s that they fill you with air.

Yes, like a flat tire being filled, they actually pump you up with air to do whatever they do in the great labyrinth of what is called your intestines, better known as the great highway where no man has gone before.

They blow you up…ha ha! Who knew?

Afterwards the nurse was pressing on my stomach to push the air out.

Funny. The nurse won’t resuscitate, but pushing out air is something they really do like to do.

As I was getting ready to leave the nurse said, “Well, good news! You don’t have to have another one of these for ten more years.”

Don’t tell my doctor. Hopefully, he’ll be too old to remember my name.

 

March 17, 2015 Posted by | Life, Uncategorized | | 1 Comment

Did This Pilot REALLY Do This? Wow.

Nobody Flashes

O.K. all you pilots out there, is this a real video, or is this fake?

It looks real to me, but even if it isn’t, it’s fun to watch.

Enjoy!

February 21, 2015 Posted by | Life | | 2 Comments

Nobody’s Email: Can YOU do this?

Nobody Gets Email

Lars Anderson would be a handy guy to have around in the new Zombie takeover!

I enjoyed this so much I wanted to go out and buy myself a bow and arrow.

Enjoy!

(Thanks to Kim Komando)

January 31, 2015 Posted by | Life | | Leave a comment

Nobody’s Email: Twins…First Contact

Nobody Gets Email

I’m sure it’s my female hormones that find this video so amazing, but isn’t this adorable? Two twins try to talk to each other and hold hands for the first time..OUTSIDE the womb.

It’s such a feel good video I had to share it.

Enjoy!

 

January 11, 2015 Posted by | Life, love | | Leave a comment

Nobody Flashes the Memories of Spalding Gray

Nobody Flashes

I just came across this video, and thought it was one of the strangest rants I had ever heard.

Spalding Gray evidently was a master story-teller, and I just found out about him today.

He committed suicide, as did his mother.

Take a listen, and see if you wonder like I did.. A man with his finger on the nuclear button is doing blue cocaine?

Great.

December 28, 2014 Posted by | Life, Uncategorized | | 1 Comment

Nobody Cares About My Day At Wal-Marts

Nobody Cares–

This little video pretty much sums up my day.

Like many people, I wait to the last day almost to get Christmas presents, so today, I told myself, that all my usual daily chores would just have to forget it. (Including my afternoon post) I had to get out of the house and just go do it, and I had one item on the list that was the most important…of course it was for me. :)

Not many people know, and I’m sure NOBODY really cares, that for the last few years, there is one thing I like to do for a few of my friends—I make a video of me singing some song that I know they like. They all pretend and are very nice when they get them, but I’m sure they’d rather have money—- WHICH is why, I’m glad they live far away in other states.

Yesterday, I did managed to record a video of me playing Moonlight Sonata in the dark, with my cool special effects, consisting of that electric lamp that shoots off lighting in a globe that I bought last year at the mall, and you can hardly see me. I really love that fact. I put in a candle for special effects, because frankly, I do not have Steven Spielberg’s number, OR Taylor Dane’s makeup lady. Of course, Murphy has a law that if anything can break at the last minute, it will, and that’s exactly what happened. My old Sony Camera Broke. Poof. $445, I paid for that sucker and it has always given me troubles. You had to put a little disc in it.

I have a thing about camera’s. I never read the directions, therefore I’m always cussing at them.

I STILL have my family’s old 8mm camera down in my basement. I also have two very big JVC camera’s that cost over $1,000, and the battery pack alone would give you a heat stroke. Somewhere in the 1970’s the Japanese camera people got serious. The camera’s became smaller and smaller, and every year, you had to learn something new.

Anyway, being as I always want the best bargains at the best price, I had to go ALL over the county: God forbid I buy something and I could have gotten it cheaper some place else.

I went at this marathon in this order: Office Depot, (Nope) Office Max, (Nope) Best Buy (Nope) Target (Nope), Office Depot, (Nope) Target (Nope) Wal-Mart..WAIT…Yes! I found one!

Unfortunately  it was at that Wal-Mart that has mostly Ferguson attendee’s and there I was, standing in line, waiting to be served. As she finished the transaction behind the counter, she saw me, waiting there for her, and so…she turned around and went over to some other guy…sigh. I am NOT one to back down. I followed her, and then I walked right up to her and said.

“I want this camera but you have to get it, it’s locked up.” What could she do? Michelle Obama was the first lady. She, on the other hand— She actually WORKED there. This white women was NOT going to leave her alone. So, she looked, and they were….out.

Sigh.

Forty miles to the next Wal-Mart. At this one I got a white girl, who also said, “We are out.”

“Can you call another store and find it?” I asked. I pictured having to drive to Kansas City.

“No, we don’t do that. They wouldn’t answer anyway.”

Back in the car, to the NEXT Wal-Mart, which was another 30 miles. Luckily, I got a manager who had the bad misfortune of being in the camera department. He was nice, and actually called another store (He didn’t have it either) but….he had…NINE of these camera’s

That was another 35 miles. Of course, I got lost.

Okay, GREAT! I have a camera, and I’m finally going to read the directions. Just do it. But it’s just a small little bitty thing, and it says: turn it one, put the plug in here. That’s about it. It was saying to me, “IF you are over 34 do NOT even buy this. Everybody in the universe knows this stuff.”

Don’t get me wrong. I’m pretty happy so far because you can fit the darn thing in the palm of your hand. Tonight I downloaded the manual…all 3,203 pages of it.

I might not make it by Christmas.

To top off the day, I did hear King Obama come out and ostracized Sony more than Kim Jung Un, and apologize to Castro, and say that race relations are better now than when he became President, and that he will deal with all problems, but not now. When he feels like it. He’s going to Hawaii, and then when he comes back, he will go on being King.

So tonight….you know what I’m really thankful for?

I was NOT the cameraman that had to film Obama’s speech today. I don’t care how much that camera cost, I might have thrown it on the floor.

So enjoy this video with me. It’s calming, it’s cute. It’s…..

Reminds me to have a shot of tequila.

December 20, 2014 Posted by | Life, Uncategorized | | Leave a comment

Nobody’s Email: Fly Geyser

Nobody Gets Email:

Since I like to post something on Sunday which are uplifting or beautiful in nature, I was surprise to see this; Fly Geyser, in Nevada.

John Travolta should have visited instead of the largest rubber band ball on his way to Chicago.

It really is beautiful, isn’t it?

Enjoy!

(Thanks to JR)


They could be pictures of another planet or the set of a science fiction movie. But it is in fact an amazing phenomenon created by accident in the middle of the Nevada Desert . The otherworldly images show Fly Geyser, a little-known attraction described as one of the most beautiful sights in the state. Located 20 miles north of Gerlach, in Washoe County , it was accidentally created in 1916 during well drilling. The geothermically heated pack of water found a weak spot in the wall in the 1960s and began escaping, creating a geyser. Over the years, dissolved minerals created the mound that water now spews up to five metres from. The geyser contains several terraces discharging water into 30 to 40 pools over an area of 30 hectares (74 acres). Multi-coloured: The rainbow effect is created by minerals in the water reacting with oxygen in the air. These ponds are forming an ecosystem, with small fish and birds such as swans and mallards enjoying the geyser. David Jamison, who gives tours to the geyser said: ‘I’d like to see more people be able to enjoy it. ‘When I saw it for the first time it wasn’t this big. This whole area’s kind of magic, there’s no airplanes here or cars. It’s just peaceful and quiet, all these beautiful mountains around. And the sound of the water.’ Fly Geyser is located on private land and is locked behind a closed gate and a fence topped with barbed wire. It is rarely open to the public but can be viewed from the road.

Geyser oneGeyser twoGeyser three

December 14, 2014 Posted by | Life, Uncategorized | | 1 Comment

Nobody’s Email: Give a Pilot a Camera, and it’s all Good!

Nobody Gets Email:

You gotta LOVE fighter pilots!

And by the way, I am no longer mad at the fighter pilot who took my shoe off me while I was singing at the Cheshire Inn,  and spent the night drinking vodka out of it at the bar, and wouldn’t give it back.

Seriously, I forgive you.

(Thanks to Kim Komando)

December 13, 2014 Posted by | Life, Uncategorized | , | 1 Comment

Nobody’s Email: Willie Murphy…77-year-old Weight Lifter

Nobody Gets Email

This woman is GREAT! I hope I have the same attitude at 77.  Of course, my weight lifting is around 10 pounds. I think I should punch it up a notch, after watching Willie Murphy. I’m going for…okay…twenty.

This woman is an inspiration for us all.

Enjoy!

(Thanks to Kim Komando)

December 6, 2014 Posted by | Life | | Leave a comment

A Few Fun Things to Talk About While Eating Turkey

Nobody Wins

Here’s something to talk about around your family Turkey dinner…the 10 worst business decisions.

I’ll add one more: Don’t go shopping in downtown Ferguson on Black Friday.

Have a GREAT Thanksgiving everyone!

Turkey twoTurkey

November 26, 2014 Posted by | Life, Uncategorized | | 2 Comments

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