Last week, the biggest talk was the meltdown of MSNBC reporter, Melissa-Harris Perry, who apologized for making jokes about Mitt Romney’s black adopted grandchild. It wasn’t really the fact that she insulted Mitt Romney that brought the tears, no..it was the whole ‘diversity’ issues to which she and her liberal colleges have been taught since kindergarten IS the most important thing in the world…we must accept everyone as equals. How she could commit such a crime is almost beyond understanding. After all…she is from a diverse background herself.
Alec Baldwin immediately came out and wondered if he would be forgiven for his ‘gay’ comments if he cried.
Hey, go for it, Alec.
And then there’s Dennis Rodman. Dennis Rodman, is taking some of his basketball buddies to North Korea do some more ‘basketball diplomacy’ —a unique style of foreign diplomacy developed first hand, by President Obama himself.
Officially, the White House denies that Rodman is standing in for Obama—-it’s all just fun and games. Nevertheless…Dennis is still going to visit his favorite little buddy Kim Jong–Un for his Birthday Party….AFTER the important news that the little guy had thrown his own uncle (and five of his friends) to wild dogs to be eaten alive.
Initial speculation was that Jang had been killed by firing squad, a fate that media outlets said was the usual one reserved for “traitors.” But an alternative narrative of the 67-year old’s death emerged on what appears to have been a satirical post on the Chinese Tencent Weibo site that has been repeated by many media outlets worldwide.The Dec. 11 post on Tencent Weibo said Jang and five aides were killed by dogs.
So, officially, well…that didn’t happen. The uncle ‘probably’ died the old-fashioned way: death by firing squad. Still…you have to wonder at the mental state of anyone who would want to ever visit someone who had just killed their own uncle.
The game will feature many old-timers of the NBA…and one can only assume our President would love to attend.
So–who wins the Nobody’s Perfect Award for the week? In my Nobody’s Opinion, the man who really won this week, needs no introduction—
—Why Obama has to have another White House Sequester Free Soul Party?
Obama is just four months into his term, and four vacations (if you count Obama sightseeing in the Middle East) and it’s time to par–tee!
As the White House has previously announced, Justin Timberlake (who will be making his White House debut), Al Green, Ben Harper, Queen Latifah, Cyndi Lauper, Joshua Ledet, Sam Moore, Charlie Musselwhite, Mavis Staples, and others will be performing at the exclusive event.
Nobody Knows if Obama is going to sing again, but since it’s going to be on PBS, you can bet your daddy’s 401K plan, (what’s left of it.) that it’s one of the reasons they put this together so quickly. Nothing boosted Obama’s popularity ratings as fast as when he started singing, “I’m so in love with you.” After that, nobody could get him to shut up.
Also expect him to be all over Michelle, to let the whole world know that: she really isn’t a single parent: did not file for divorce again (she once did): and he’s really not a male chauvinist pig for making that sexist comment about the attorney general. He really does love her.
And if you can’t waste taxpayers money by throwing big lavish white house parties, there’s always the Commerce Department to help you out:
Congress’s top auditor said Tuesday that the Commerce Department has been charging other government agencies millions of dollars for reports that the other agencies could just as easily have gotten online, for free. The reports don’t amount to much — the agency reported revenues of $1.5 million in fiscal year 2011 — but overall, duplication and waste are likely costing the federal government billions of dollars a year, the auditors said. But the Government Accountability Office said it can’t even begin to measure how much overlap there is because the agencies don’t keep sufficient records to evaluate that.
GAO said the Defense Department has so many different branches that each pay separately for foreign language services, but if the department were to coordinate it could save hundreds of millions of dollars a year.
Everybody knows that if we cut the waste and fraud out of all government departments we’d could probably pay off the debt in half the time, but Nobody Knows that nobody in Congress will ever prosecute anyone for stealing taxpayer money, because they would all have to go to jail…and there is no jail big enough to hold them all.
President Obama gathered up a bunch of grieving parents from Sandy Hook, and took them all on a ride on Air Force One, to a gun rally to support gun control, and said this:
“Some folks in Washington are already floating the idea that they may use political stunts to prevent votes on any of these reforms,”
Nobody Knows why Obama and his many minions do NOT see that dragging these poor people all over the country is a political stunt..but they have mastered the, “These are not the droids you seek” Ob-bi-wan mind control. Republicans…have not. It’s that simple.
And then there’s a problem with the new technology: Texting. I don’t do it. I think the human voice is much faster. But then, that’s me. You can’t drink and drive, but nobody seems to have a problem with taking your eyes off the road and punching tiny little buttons. But this guy…went further:
Texting by a pilot before and during a 2011 medical-helicopter flight in Missouri contributed to its crash. The NTSB documented at least 240 texts sent and received by the pilot during his shift the day of the accident, according to records. There were 20 such texts with a coworker before and during the accident.
Because this guy couldn’t stop fighting with his girlfriend (come on, you KNOW he was talking to a woman) he killed the patient, the other pilot, a flight nurse, and a paramedic. His excuse for not refueling the plane was that he hadn’t slept well the night before.
Nobody Knows how somebody could be smart enough to get a pilot’s license, but do such a dumb thing as not filling up the plane with gas because he was too busy texting.
Gay Marriage:—If the Supreme Court will make same-sex marriage a constitutional right, which would go against the Constitution. Since the beginning, it’s been up to the states to determine such matters, not the Federal Government. And, since the people of California voted on Proposition 8, it should not be overturned.
At another point Chief Justice John Roberts asked Olson whether those seeking to strike down Proposition 8 were interested only in the label “marriage,” since the state of California already grants same-sex couples almost all the legal protections and rights provided to heterosexual married couples.
What the elites want is to force churches to marry gay couples. And since the top GOP minions like Karl Rove, are now supporting it, don’t be shocked if gay marriage becomes the law of the land. But, Nobody Really Knows what’s going to happen. It’s not that gays shouldn’t marry, it that the issues should be up to the voters in the states.
The Great EU Bank Robbery: Wow…the EU thought taking money from people’s bank accounts was so easy, they decided it’s a faster and better way to steal money. Why tax when you can just reach in the cookie jar and take it all? Cyrus just wasn’t enough.
Savings accounts in Spain, Italy and other European countries will be raided if needed to preserve Europe’s single currency by propping up failing banks, a senior euro zone official has announced.
So…where ARE the rich, or the little guy for that matter… going to go to hide their money from the elites? Nobody Knows.
Obama Vacations: In the first three months of the year, members of the first family have been on three vacations, averaging a vacation a month. And now it’s being reported that the first daughters are on a spring break vacation in the Bahamas.
Gee…MOST parents would never dream of sending their kids off to a hotspot vacation without mom or dad along. But it seems, the taxpayers are the nannies on this one. The above statement is false: Obama had a vacation in Israel and Jordan where he took days off to see the sights, his life is one continual vacation day after another, with a few speeches in-between. Nobody Knows where they are going next: Disneyland?
North Korea: Nobody Knows—If the reason Obama is sending all those thousands of tanks to California is because North Korea is threatening to nuke us every single day.
North Korea has elevated its artillery and strategic missile forces to “combat-ready posture” and said it is prepared to strike targets in South Korea, Japan, Guam, Hawaii and the continental US.
In the newly released movie Olympus, ( I just saw it today) North Korea takes over the White House and captures the President with such stealth and expertise, it made our military look lame….and just ONE man saves everybody. Something that would not happen in real life.
I kept thinking that the North Koreans would LOVE this movie, since they can’t even make a decent video as good as a ten-year-old American. Leave it to American Movie producers to make them look good.
I don’t remember any President of the United States ever putting up with such a punk as Kim Jung Um, but then, that was before half our big companies were making most of their money in China.
Does that mean we will have to listen to this punk forever?
North Korea just released this video in where they dream of nuking New York. In the background is the music of Michael Jackson– “We Are the World.” Nobody asks herself —is the reason they want to nuke New York is because Steven Spielberg lives in California? Why hit the same place twice? Isn’t Micheal Bloomberg doing enough damage as it is?
And oh my goodness…’President’ Obama today…all of a sudden, seems a bit worried about the “sequester” coming up in March, which will decimate our military down to the point that even people with the video capabilities of a six-year-old can fire some missiles at us, and have a decent chance of succeeding.
You know, it’s got to be tough. Here’s a President that is trying to bring troops home from around the world, in order to put them to work as his own private HomeLand Security army, and some little dweeb over in North Korea is making him look silly.
And you might say: Come on Joyanna…how can a country that can’t even make a simple video actually launch a missile to hit New York? (And once again…why is it always New York?)
Well…once upon a time…Bill Clinton sent over his favorite plutonium giver Sandy Berger, and Sandy supplied North Korea with enough uranium to make their own bombs, which they did. Of course, Clinton said later that, “They lied, they told me they needed it for peaceful means.”
And just recently, Google CEO, Eric Schmidt, went over to North Korea with Sandy Berger, and…you have to wonder what else was given to them? Have you noticed that Bill Clinton and Sandy Berger are the only two politicians that love to visit North Korea? Have you also noticed that every time a democrat comes back from visits to countries that don’t like us, they want to kill us even more?
Democrats. Arming the world…with the help of Michael Jackson. In the meantime, who are all the democrats screaming about as the ones that have to be destroyed forever more?
The Tea Party.
And that’s because the Tea Party KNOWS where the real enemy lies, and it’s not in New York.
Since my last vacation happened BEFORE Disney died, I like to sit around and think of what kind of vacation I would think up for rich people and their friends…you know, the “Let me help you get a life” vacation? I could be a damn good travel agent for the average billionaire who is tired of going to the South Of France..
Here’s one that I think they would enjoy:
First: The owner of this vacation would pick 1,000 of his favorite people, and pile them on Air Force One outside of Dulles. All that would be needed is a simple $3 billion dollar campaign fund donated to Obama’s re-election money bags, and you would have the finest jet in the world take you and your friends to the thrilling land of S. Korea.
Second: You will arrive in Panmunjom, the demilitarized Zone between North and South Koreas….Meeting you at the airstrip will be 250 brand new Mercedes Benz Mini-Vans to take you and your guests to the place where you are going to be spending the night.
Your vans will pull up to the Tentanic..yes, a tent that can hold 1,000 people. There you will spend the night being poured the finest champange, while Celine Dion performs her best hit from the Titanic movie: “I’ll be loving you…in all the old familiar places..back of cars where you embrace me….long agoooooo.”
Wait. No…well, she’s only going to be there singing the one hit from the Titianic, and you will be allowed to smash glasses and throw whatever happens to be on the floor. And don’t worry—Whatever happens in that tent: STAYS in that tent.
Third: The next day– a real treat! Golf. In pairs of four, everyone will get to play the most dangerous golf course in the world, which sits in the demilitarized zone between North and South Korea. There is only one hole to play: a par three..192 yards, but the rough is filled with land mines! Think of the fun bets you could win by challenging the other team to go in and get his ball!
Forth: Be sure and ask the “President to play. Donate another $ 5 billion to his campaign.
Fifth:After that fun game of golf, everyone will get back in their Mini-vans and head off to the nearest Ocean. There you will all be given your very own submarine to explore the sea in. Those that do NOT want to participate in this event, have get to sit on the beach and smoke Lamborghini cigarettes, if they like. (One pack: $2,700)
At the end of the day, when all the subs are discarded, everyone will get back in the Mini-vans to get back on Air Force One. Be sure and tell the pilot that the President in on board. If he isn’t, don’t worry. You gave him enough money to get a ride back to the states. Let him buy his own damn plane.
Hey…did you have fun! Nobody thanks you for traveling on Nobody’s Imaginary Vacations! (Thanks to LuxuryLaunches for all the inspiration!)