Joyanna Adams

Nobody's Opinion

Preston Smith Needs to Give His Speech at the Next Al-Qaeda Meeting. Let’s Buy Him a Ticket…

Nobody Wins …

If you want to see an elitists morons who thinks it’s cute to make fun of other’s religions and traditions, then you might want to fly down and catch the City Commission meetings in Lake Worth, Florida.

From WMD:

An atheist invited to give the opening prayer at a Lake Worth, Florida, City Commission meeting recently called on the “wisdom of Satan” and declared “if almighty Thor is with us, who can ever be against us,” a perversion of a New Testament verse.
 

“Though he mentions Satan, Allah, Buddha, Zeus, and even Jesus, it all comes down to the fact that he openly states that he wants people to ‘do good for goodness sake’ and he doesn’t want to hear about damnation or judgment.”

Right…talk about stupid. If only the world would just do good for goodness sake, then we can all get along.

He just explained Obama’s foreign policy in one sentence.

Can we send this guy to Al Qaeda? surprise four

Here’s his ‘prayer':

Mother Earth, we gather today in your redeeming and glorious presence to invoke your eternal guidance in the universe, the original creator of all things. May the efforts of this council blend the righteousness of Allah with the all knowing wisdom of Satan. May Zeus, the great god of justice, grant us strength tonight. Jesus might forgive our shortcomings while Buddha enlightens us through his divine affection.

We praise you Krishna for the sanguine sacrifice that freed us all. After all, if almighty Thor is with us, who can ever be against us? And finally for the bounty of logic, reason and science, we simply thank the atheists, agnostics, humanists, who now account for one in five Americans and growing rapidly.

In closing. Let us above all, love one another, not to obtain mythical rewards for ourselves now, hereafter or based on superstitious threats of eternal damnation, but rather embrace secular-based principles of morality, and do good for goodness sake.

And so we pray, so what?

SO WHAT?

We have to pray because more idiots like this guy are running our country. (The Mayor, much to his credit, walked out.)

I don’t know about you, but I would have yelled something at the guy like, “Satan can have you!” or “Allah will cut your head off, and that will be one less moron on the planet!” “Go back to your cocktail hour!” “Mother Earth wants you to die!” “Get a haircut!” “Go trim a tree!” “Quick, there’s a nudist camp right outside!”

What happens with these elite idiots is that they read a lot of books on religion, see NO difference in any religion, and go through life looking at everything and everything pertains to them and the god they think they are, and they just don’t get it, because they really are—- just plain stupid.

Really. Brainless.

BECAUSE they allowed this idiot to talk, they have opened up Pandora’s box of idiots who want to make fun of Christians:  Next week– A Satanist.

December 18, 2014 Posted by | Religion, Uncategorized | , | Leave a comment

Nobody Wishes The Joy of Reincarnation to ALL Liberals.

Nobody WinsARianna Huffington

God…I LOVE synchronicity…I was trying to find a theme for my NOBODY WINS post tonight, and I thought I’d remark about this book I got from the library. It’s all about the new ‘theme’ that the liberal minds are trying to explore. You know….they are trying to destroy “god” by building the, “YOU are god” dearie— worship your own soul! “-–BS. And then, tonight I ran into this from Arianna Huffington:

Wherever I go around the world, I see the same hunger to live our lives with more meaning and purpose and less unnecessary stress and burnout. This is the goal of a new online course being offered by the University of Santa Monica, which I’m delighted we have arranged to offer free for HuffPost readers. Entitled “33 Days of Awakening Through Loyalty to Your Soul,” the class is designed to teach us how to nurture a sense of well-being, joy, purpose and fulfillment. Of course, there are going to be challenges along the way, but as the course’s founders, Drs. Ron and Mary Hulnick, show, there are ways in which many of these challenging moments can in fact strengthen and reaffirm our sense of purpose and well-being instead of taking us off-course.

Good lord. That’s exactly what the author of the book I’m reading wants to do— Program our minds..but he wants us all to have a conversation on his website so he can carefully ‘guide’ it.

(No Joyanna, she’s REALLY just trying to help, you say? ah……) The storm before the calm

Well, I could certainly use less stress—– I was having trouble the last few weeks, (As you know, I have been too close to Ferguson) but alas, I forget the liberal bleeding hearts out in the world are suffering much more than I. They break out in hives if just one person is suffering over in India, or one immigrant child doesn’t like the food in Texas. This liberal stress usually last until they can still get their morning Caramel Cappuccino with double the nuts—for protein. Yes, the nut is replacing the hamburger for protein, haven’t you notice all the ‘protein’ bars? Soon…BUG Bars.

WAKE UP! Pay attention.

For those of you who don’t read, or who are not paying attention, the liberals for a while have been trying desperately to ‘unite’ the world in some kind of NEW religion, where everyone will feel happy, joyous, peaceful, serene in a world with no problems, no fighting, no wars…

They write science fiction about this utopia in books and movies— of course, it never ends well.Oprah A new Earth

Oprah took a stab at it..this new religion. She failed. Then everyone read her “THE SECRET” book, in which it says…”Follow your heart. Follow your soul. Everything will just COME to you!”

Hahahahaha…only if you happen to be in Oprah’s audience when she gave away the cars.

So, I’m going to post here, for sheer entertainment, what the New World Order of elite liberals are trying to do. They are trying to sell you communism wrapped in a NEW Earth religion.

Hey, if I don’t tell you, how are you going to NOT laugh?

The book I got this stuff out of is called: The Storm Before the Calm by Neale Donald Walsch. (see picture.)

First off: Walsch SWEARS that God…had a personal conversation with HIM, and told him what to do. There IS going to be an overhaul of humanity. Here’s some of the lessons god taught him:

  1. Nothing dies. (We are all reincarnated.) Therefore the soul is ALWAYS joyful to leave.
  2. We must take responsibility for our past. ( All western civilization should now suffer.)
  3. WE are creating earthquakes, hurricanes, tornadoes. and global warming. This is all man-made.
  4. We must abandoned our traditions and ancestors in order to evolve.
  5. You are ONLY here to assist in the evolution of your species.
  6. The sixties were GREAT! (Mr. Walsch was obviously stoned and had a lot of sex after rock concerts.)
  7. Your life isn’t about YOU.
  8. Transfer the money spent on defense to feeding the world.
  9. If a person attacks another, it’s because he is suffering.
  10. We need a growth model based on given people more time to enjoy life, and less stuff.
  11. There IS no right or wrong. Religion is oppressive.
  12. Nobody is better than anybody else. (Unless of course…you LIKE the “old culture.” (That’s what he calls religions and our founders.)
  13. There is no such thing as misbehaving in the eyes of God. ( Bill Clinton has this down.) All sex is a joy. (He says nothing about rape, but if you want to screw your best friend’s spouse…feel free!)

You get the idea: smash down every religion, and know that YOU are god, and no one can judge you at all. Do whatever feels good. There IS no right, no wrong.Druge

And then he goes into economics. It’s pretty simple: Everybody in the world gives 10 percent of their income to the government. The state takes care of everything.

Which means, to Mr. Walsch, an end to the endless struggle for bigger, better, more. An end to discrimination. If people don’t want to work, that’s okay too. They can just…be. They will still receive the same thing as everybody else.

He calls this new economic system: Beingism. Yes, you can just sit and be lazy, have a lot of sex, in your trailer park.

BUT…if you don’t work, they will put your name on a list on the internet. There will be…INTERNET SHAME! (Millions will reincarnate to escape)

Okay…enough. You get the idea.

The progressives ARE communists. They know that they can’t call communism anymore “communism” because, historically speaking, it’s killed more people than capitalism.commie poster

And so, they will keep trying to come up with a new “religion,” to sooooooooth all our pains.

You can call it whatever you like: Go into the future with progressive “Beingism” communism, or try to rekindle the “old culture” ….and which one do you think is going to ‘evolve’ the species?

Yes, Mr. Walsch, said God SPOKE to him, and he’s on a mission…we all must talk, and teach the kids, what god REALLY wants.

So, when I read Arianna Huffington trying to sell the same “We are all stressed out dears, we need to find our souls.” I think I’ll keep my soul to myself.

I would rather go down to the crossroads–something tells me, I might get a better deal.

On a lighter note, if we go by “God’s” conversation, wouldn’t the liberals just all be better off reincarnated?

We DO want them to feel joyful now…don’t we?

August 28, 2014 Posted by | communism, progressives, Uncategorized | , , | 2 Comments

Send the Looters to Saudi Arabia….

Nobody’s Opinion

“Thou shall not steal.”

Watching the looters all last week in Ferguson, I often wondered…why is the outrage only held for the cop, and not for the looters that destroyed all the local shops, and for what? Those shop owners had NOTHING to do with the cop’s action. Nothing.looting two

Most of those shops, were owned by Chinese and other ‘minorities’, not the hated white people.

And by the way….to be a ‘minority’ now in America, gives you automatic special privileges over everybody else. That is now…the norm. Just the word itself, promotes inequality, always putting one group over another. There is nothing that is fair and equal about that at all. And yet, free stuff is giving daily to “minorities, in order to equalized society we are told.

Food stamps, subsidized housing, college tuitions, free lunches at school, free cell phones, free cable TV, free furniture: Call it what you will: socialism, communism— whatever, but when you take from one group and redistribute it to another, you are stealing from one group and giving to another.

It IS a form of stealing. BUT…if the government steals, it’s okay. (That’s a blog in itself.)

But, back to people stealing: Why do some people steal and some people don’t? Is it religion?

You can’t tell me some of those kids in Ferguson didn’t have grandma raising them up NOT to steal.Looting one

Most every society on the planet agrees that stealing is bad. It’s unfair, and in most countries, it’s a serious crime:

In Saudi Arabia if you steal, they cut off your hand. They also behead you. So far this year they have a rate of more than one executions a day. Rape, murder, apostasy, armed robbery and drug trafficking are all punishable by death under the kingdom’s strict interpretation of Islamic teachings.

But, here in America, looting is tolerated. One of the most unbelievable things that Al Sharpton said about Mike Brown stealing cigars is that everybody knows that there’s ‘stealing’ and there’s ‘shoplifting.” Shoplifting..is not a crime.

Al explained that Mike Brown, was ‘shoplifting’. That’s okay. The democrats then got on CNN and went on to explain that “all kids shoplifting” it’s just something every kid does.

Well, I didn’t. In fact, in this country not so long ago, shoplifting was considered really bad. It was stealing, and if you were caught, it was never good.

But—Since Obama was elected, the blacks have had full permission in this country to shoplift to their heart’s content. In fact, it’s become a fun game for them…they shoplift and then they go knock people out. Okay, so they did in the sixties, and the seventies, and the eighties, but…it’s gone full moon-Monty now.

Obama has kept completely quiet about it all. And why shouldn’t he be quiet?  Obamacare steals money out of everybody’s pocket…doesn’t it?

Obama lies. And steals. Why should we expect anything different from black kids?

We can’t.

So, why do some people steal and other’s don’t? It’s it just a natural human instinct to steal? I might envy someone’s emerald ring, but I would never want to steal it. Which brings us to another old Moses commandment:

Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour’s.Moses and the ten commandments

We don’t talk about his rule much, but let’s suppose that Moses was just a man leading his people out of Egypt. Let’s suppose because Moses came to a point in the desert where he thought himself: “These people keep fighting with each other, how the heck am I going to control them? They are stealing each other’s food, flirting with one another’s wives, other men’s possessions, how in the world am I to stop this?”

I guess if you think that God is going to smack you down in the middle of the desert with a huge holy comet, you might think twice.

God bless Moses. They just don’t make leaders like that anymore.

And so, those Ten Commandments helped keep civilizations together since who knows when. But..they aren’t working anymore.

Why?

“They” are getting rid of God. (Yes, you cannot even say “God bless you!” in school.) Some would say, we are one sneeze away from hell on earth.

You get rid of God, and who’s to say you can’t do whatever the heck you want? –like play one more round of golf after someone has been beheaded.

So, why do people steal?

Are we just one up from Planet of the Apes?

Even animals steals. There isn’t a day goes by that one of my dogs doesn’t ‘steal treats from the other one.

She doesn’t need it. She’s not starving. She does it simply because, she can. She just wants it.

And so, just like dogs, the blacks will continue to steal whatever and whenever they can, not because they need the stuff, or because they feel injustice in their lives….

They are doing it just because they can.

Not better than dogs.

So, in the light of the fact that Obama and his leftist commie ninnies are letting Moses’ ten commandments go by the wayside of history, maybe we should lobby Congress for a new law that says:

Anyone who loots a store, or is caught on camera shoplifting: Will be sent to Saudi Arabia immediately.—-it’s the least we can do Arab law two

Let Jesse Jackson raise their ransom. …after all…he is their …Moses.

The horror of that would be so scary, I bet looting would become a thing of the past. Why…Christianity would probably make a big comeback! We might get another movie..

“Tom Hanks plays Moses.”

Hey..why not? At this point: All suggestions are welcomed.

 

August 24, 2014 Posted by | black violence, History, L:aw, Uncategorized | , | 2 Comments

What’s Great About Youtube? You can do THIS.

Nobody Gets Email

The old question of “Is there a god” was being discussed the other night on Coast to Coast with Dinesh D’Souza, who said, nobody can ‘prove’ it either way. But in his case, he preferred the Occam’s Razor answer…just to be safe. If you don’t know, better to bet on it.

Amfortas, who is a good Catholic, sent me the FIVE arguments for, below is some girl’s reason…against. I found her really funny. (Don’t tell her) But she at least READS, and is trying to think, which is more than I can say for the average college student.

Enjoy, and remember: Nobody really knows do they? But, most of us— usually decide at some point. I’m with Dinesh.

 

June 14, 2014 Posted by | Freedom of Religion, Uncategorized | | 2 Comments

The Anunnaki….And Other Fun Thoughts

Nobody Remembers

To me, arguments about religion, are like watching a snake swallow its own tale. In the end the snake eats itself, and there’s nothing left to talk about. And religion is fun to talk about. (See video below, for a man having fun talking about religion.)

Every religion has its stories, and lately, some people have come up with a new twist trying to figure out, just exactly how we all got here. Basically, it’s the story of the Anunnaki, who according to some scholars, were aliens who came here long ago, bred with human women, and improved the race.Anunnaki

(There’s the first flaw…improved?)

Let’s see if I’ve got this story right:  Some really curious German guy named Georg Grotefend had been reading ancient Sumerian tablets one afternoon, and read this:

“After the kingship descended from heaven, the kingship was in Eridu. In Eridu, Alulim became king: he ruled for 28,000 years. Then Alalngar reigned for 36,000 years, while En-men-lu-ana ruled for 43,2000 years.

As you remember, Noah, Seth, Enos and others lived more than 900 years.

(2nd flaw: Who was counting this?)

So, it seems the REASON these guys lived so long is because they were actually from another planet. Moses and Seth were hybrids, so therefore, because of the human woman DNA, they got royally robbed. After the great flood, nobody lived very long. Gilgamesh, only lived for 120 years. (And his descendants live on Gilligan’s island)

The Sumerians (Who were actually aliens) gave us the 60 minutes concept (without we would not have a 60 minute TV show) and the Zodiac, something which none of us could live without. Obviously Nancy Reagan was closer to the Gods than the rest of us.

Now…pay close attention:—-An Alien named Quetzalcoatl, the great teacher of the Mayans, was known as Vircocha to the Incas, and as the sun god Ra to the Egyptians. Evidently this guy zipped all over the planet and build pyramids. (He is also known as Marduk, god of Marmaduke)anunnaki statue

So why in the world did these ‘gods’ come to Earth? To mine for gold silly! Greedy bastards live everywhere in the universe. No..the real reason they wanted the gold…get ready for it:

The Annunnaki sought gold to save their atmosphere, which had apparently sprung leaks similar to those we have created in ours by damaging the Earth’s ozone layer with Hydro fluorocarbons. They disperse extremely tiny flakes of gold into the upper atmosphere to patch holes.”

Right. Global warming is happening everywhere in the universe. If Al Gore starts insisting we need a REALLY high priced world carbon tax to plug our ozone holes with gold, I say we say to him, “ Go back to your mother Gaia, and paint your face with coconut oil, and leave us alone!”

Anyway, the Anunnaki used the Neanderthals as slaves to mine the gold—but they were slow, so two alien brothers: Enlil and Enki (first gay couple) came to take control. Enlil (firstborn) was head ruler. (Aliens also practiced the stupid habit of giving the oldest son control) Enlil was mission commander, and Enki was executive and science officer…and guess what? They didn’t get along.

Lucky us.

Enki drained the marshes on the northern shore of the Persian Gulf, and with his son Marduk —-they worked on irrigating the land between the Tigris and Euphrates. Murduk later nuked the Tower of Babel, and other places, and became RA the first ruler of Egypt.Annunnaki ship

(3rd flaw: You can have only so many alien RA’s)

All the pharaohs were Marduk’s offspring: Geg and Nut, Osiris, Isis, Seth, ..and one day they built the Great Pyramid to imprisoned Murdock because he was just nuking too much, and making big holes in the planet, like the Dead Sea.

Enki had a girlfriend named Ninhursag and they produced the first test tube baby: Adam…who was a combination of an African human woman, and a young Anunnaki male. But an alien woman carried the child to term. So that explains how Adam got here. Seeing what they had done, like the typical rulers all over the universe they said this:

“The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever. “

So they put caps on our DNA so we would die and not get too smart. Now it’s called Obamacare.  (There are rulers, and then there’s the rest of us, and it’s best we stay stupid, according to them.)

So there they were, Alien gods, fornicating day and night with the women of the earth, and then one day Enlil complained that the sound of mating humans kept him awake at night. (I HATE when that happens) And so he decided to kill them all, with Obamacare..

No…no…he did it with a flood.

But Enki was way ahead of him, He helped his hybrid Noah build a boat, supplied it with all the DNA of the planet, (taking a lot of weight off Noah who was trying to figure out how to walk the elephants to the bathroom) and voila! Human kind flourish to this day!Noah's Ark

So you can thank the alien Enki, not God, that we are all here. According to the legends, they were just like us: They were vain, petty, cruel, incestuous, and hateful. And that’s why Hillary Clinton will run for President: She just can’t help herself.

Oh— the Anunnaki also developed the wheel, schools, medical science, the fisrt written proverbs, history, taxation, laws, social reforms, the first cosmogony and the first money, as well as the first bicameral Congress. I suggest we go to THEIR planet and make them mine for gold.Rothchild

And the Rothschild’s claim to be direct descendants of the Sumarian Kings.

Now, wasn’t that fun?

(Nobody Notes: So…did anybody like any of those other templates, or does this one suit you fine?  If it does, I’ll try to figure out how to make the fonts bigger, which is my main concern. Thanks for putting up with my Monkish proclivities. )

All info out of Jim Mars: Our Occulted History

December 19, 2013 Posted by | Egypt, global warming, Uncategorized | , , , | 3 Comments

Nobody’s Perfect: Pope Benedict XVI VS The Miami Marlins

Nobody’s Perfect

What happening? Everybody is upset about that lovable but very old Pope Benedict XVI retiring. Frankly, being the Pope should be like any other job, and since he is the leader of his own nation-state, it’s only fitting that someone who’s brain isn’t functioning should NOT be in the drivers’ seat..really. Pope resigns

This notion that leaders of great institutions (take our Congress for instance) should stay in their jobs while dementia or strokes racks their brains, and all the top decision that come out of those brains must be adhered too—- is absurd.

Wait…Hillary just had a stroke…should she be allowed to run for President? Shouldn’t she retire for good?

Of course she should, but she won’t, because you see…Pope Benedict’s brain is still functioning–we’re not sure we can say that about Hillary.

Here’s what the Pope said:

In today’s world, subject to so many rapid changes and shaken by questions of deep relevance for the life of faith, in order to govern the bark of St. Peter and proclaim the gospel, both strength of mind and body are necessary, strength which in the last few months has deteriorated in me to the extent that I have had to recognize my incapacity to adequately fulfill the ministry entrusted to me.”

The Pope is not God, nor a Pharaoh…so what is the big deal?

This…is a daddy issue. People have been living without daddies for much too long. For instance, Chris Rock says Obama is our Daddy. All the Cardinals were on TV crying and saying he was like their Father.

Daddy Pope. (sigh)

So, who’s going to be the new pawn? A South American Pope? Since the news is talking about a black man from Africa, odds are…that’s just who the “elites’ want for the next decade since it seems the wars are going to Africa now and out of the Middle East, a black Pope would give them some clout with the black Muslims. Or a Spanish-speaking Pope to help with the upcoming amnesty?

Nobody Wonders.

Pope’s are not perfect: Really. How heavy is that silly hat? Poor guy..Frankly, I thought he has been out of his mind the second year of his popeful reign…when he started talking about aliens….

And then you have the Miami Marlins, whose fan base consists of four people standing in line to get tickets to the Miami Marlins Winter warm up FANFARE event. Evidently, they ate before they came to the park.  Marlins line

So, who wins the Nobody’s Perfect award for the week?

The Marlins win!  To have a baseball franchise, where 74 players are paid millions in salaries, (in a brand new tax-funded stadium) and they can only get four people interested in showing up to watch them play….I’d say the perfection card for the Miami Marlins is sitting somewhere in purgatory.

If the Pope can retire with dignity, maybe the Miami Marlins should too. I say we all say a good Catholic prayer for those poor workers at the concession stand. They are going to need divine intervention…maybe we should write the Pope and he can give them his blessing before he retires..

Marlines line 2Go ahead. You write him. I’m not a Catholic.

 

 

February 11, 2013 Posted by | baseball, Catholics, humor | , , , | 2 Comments

Nobody Has the Energy to Ask..What We All Wonder…

Nobody Knows

While I should be thrilled to hear the ‘President’ make so many references to me in a speech, (cough, cough) even I was surprised when Obama blurted this out…I mean, I had NO idea that he was all for putting people back to work creating energy, and that means that he is going to approve the Keystone pipeline!

RIGHT?

Obama:

“Nobody wants a handout. Nobody wants to get something for nothing,” Obama said. “But if we’ve got a chance to create energy and create value and put people back to work, why wouldn’t we do that?

Yes! Exactly, Mr. President! Why wouldn’t we do that? Just by saying this, how can you possibly refuse to build the Keystone pipeline because it would do exactly what you just said: create jobs,  and create energy? Even Slim Pickens got out of the Windmill farms.  Let’s go!

Nobody Knows how the President can keep on wanting to pour billions of taxpayers’ dollars down failing green energy jobs, because they all fail.

Which is why that video is an excellent way to start Mitt’s campaign attacks.

Nobody Knows–

But Nobody Thinks, that the blacks around Obama are starting a big “get whitey” campaign motion going to get Obama reelected.

Yesterday, Eric Holder, a man who thinks whites are to blame for all the black problems, has decided to get all the black ministers in the country mobilized to make sure all the blacks stay on Obama’s plantations:

Attorney General Eric Holder, the IRS, and the liberal lawyers at the ACLU will brief several hundred pastors in the African American community on how to participate in the presidential election — which the Congressional Black Caucus chair expects will help President Obama’s campaign..

“In fact, we’re going to have the IRS administrator there, we’re going to have the Attorney General Eric Holder there, we’re going to have the lawyers’ organization from around the country, the ACLU — all giving ministers guidance about what they can and cannot do,” he noted.

Wait…isn’t that against the Constitution? The government giving ministers “guidance” about what they can and cannot do? We are not paying Eric Holder to “tell” churches what to do, that’s against the Constitution. And if  the churches become Obama’s campaigners, they should pay taxes.

So, is the IRS being used as a threat? Or to make them all feel protected?

What would happen if all the “white” ministers got together and told their members to vote for Mitt Romney, because he’s white?

Well, one thing we do know…there isn’t one white politician that is going to say one thing about the insidious actions of the President using black churches to campaign for his reelection.

A BLACK politicians could–but nobody knows if they will.

I’m not holding my breath. How am I suppose to feel when Obama only goes to the “black” churches for support? Doesn’t he LIKE white people? Nobody Knows…but if you go by his actions:NOPE

May 29, 2012 Posted by | Barack Obama, Obama, political races, Race, Uncategorized | , , , , , | 2 Comments

Knocking on the Atheist’s Door

Nobody’s Fool

“No John, ” I said to my friend as he was lying in the hospital bed. “You would be surprised to know that I’m not in disagreement with you…it’s just that, religion brings great comfort to so many people…you must know that?”

My 73-year-old very liberal friend, John, was getting so upset, that the beeper on the machine that was hooked up to his arms, started beeping. John shouted,  “That’s annoying!”and pushed the button hard with his fist to call the nurse. He had surgery the day before to replace a kneecap.

Add that knee surgery to his past triple bypass, gallbladder removal, prostate cancer, and diabetes, and you have a man who is not exactly in good shape.

But when he looks in the mirror, he sees a vibrant young stud. Always will. And I have NO idea how he pulls off that little trick. To me, he looks just this side of George Burns without the sense of humor.

You see, John had never gotten married, because, he …loved sex. Hooked on it in fact. When we first met(at a library computer class) he would brag about his past and all he would talk about was…sex…how many thousands of girls he had…bedded. He was 60 at the time. It was driving him crazy that it was getting harder and harder for him to pick up the usual two or three women he was accustomed to. To him, the good old days of four girls a night were heaven.

 To me, he was just a very lonely old soul. No wife, no children,…and he sold water faucets. Traveling salesman. Spending his life in cars. I would have crashed myself long ago into a ditch if I had been him, but he liked it. I can only imagine what he spent his money on, because all he had to show for his single life was a nice car and a condo.

I hadn’t seen him in ten years and within five minutes I was already getting lectured on the “weak” minded people who believe in god. Those people, like that damn Jerry Falwell, they have ruined the world..he said.

John is a very proud atheist. To him, anyone who believes in God is not as brilliant, or as strong as he is.

Strong was the word he used, and it was how he felt about himself.

“Well, Obama today is talking about God.”I said. “The Democrats are ALWAYS preaching in Churches.” Okay, I shouldn’t have said that. John is a liberal, and I was just about to find out…how he started down the path of how he became his wonderful enlightened liberal self.

It was in high school. He was only fifteen and he basically broke his virginity with a sixteen-year -old foreign exchange student from Sweden. It was there he learned how to look at the world. She taught him that what he was raised to believe in, was bull. This lead him to a life of hedonism that served the one purpose…himself, and his sexual needs.

Even though I have not seen John since I met him so long ago,he would write me emails telling me how lonely he was…searching for a woman. I had no illusions about it, his body was falling apart and there was no one to take care of him in his old age. John, was realizing that he needed someone to grow old with. 

He showed me a picture of his new Swedish girlfriend. She was a doctor, 62 years old. He had met her online, and she was in great shape and by all accounts a beautiful woman.

He even had a picture of her when she was sixteen. There was one picture that was not exactly the best, and it galled me when he said, “Oh..that’s a terrible picture.”

That’s a godless man for you. Ugly old man, making a remark about a sixty -year old beautiful face.

You see, John had never gotten married, because, he …loved sex. Hooked on it in fact. When we first met he would brag about his past and all he would talk about was…sex. He was 60 at the time.

And now, he finally found someone.

“She was just screwing around with me when she got my email.” he said. “I told her I knew her little village well, and she didn’t believe me. She thought I was lying.”

But for once in his lying life, John wasn’t lying. I can only imagine the hundreds of past trailing tears laying ribbons of despair after John was sexually through with them. When I reminded him that he must have lied in his life with so many girls, he said that was in the 70’s: Everybody lied.

Evidently this woman had been lied to, and was careful with her heart. John was truly surprised that she didn’t trust men.

“Oh..so people actually LIE in Sweden too” I said? “Is there an epidemic of lying that we don’t know about?” Insinuating that in his European utopia, people weren’t perfect.

John doesn’t get my sense of humor.

“Well John, I think there is some higher power.” I said, “Because there are things in this life, miracles if you wish to call them, that happen every single day and mathematically speaking, the odds are against it..without something else causing it.”

“For instance, what are the odds, that you would meet the perfect woman for you? One who doesn’t want to get married (he hates the institution)—who lives in the most beautiful town in the world, that you loved as a soldier, in a country which has high taxes (he thinks we need to be taxed more) who has perfect breasts (so important to him) and body. She’s your idea of the perfect blond, and on top of all that, she’s a doctor! You are in such bad shape, you’d be lucky to get a nurse for a girlfriend, but a doctor?”

“What are the odds that just by chance you would met this doctor on the internet?”

Well, I may not know calculus, but It doesn’t take much of a brain to see that the odds are like 1 million to 1, and if you saw John, you’d say, I was short a few billion.

To me, this selfish, moronic, and pathetic lonely soul lying in this bed was sent a miracle today by God. A real woman to finally love him in his old age. God is giving John one last chance of happiness. He should hurry as fast as a plane can carry him and go get this woman, and live his days out as a happy liberal in Sweden.

BUT…she has a son.

“Personally, I think he should not be living with her, after all, he’s 21.”

John, doesn’t really want the 21 year old around.

There you go.

God knocks on many doors…and some just don’t care to hear it.  Will John open door number One? Or door number two?

 I’ll let you know.

November 3, 2011 Posted by | American Culture, Uncategorized | , , , , , | 6 Comments

   

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