And now, a Word From our Olympic Sponcer: Mom
Nobody Flashes
(just in case you missed it) —–that our Sponcer today are mothers who had no CLUE that their kids were outside doing this stuff. Thank god.
And because we love moms, we also thank Sage Kotsenburg’s mother for giving us the first gold metal of the Olympic games.
Nobody Gets Email: The Senior Mind
Nobody’s Email
I like the email jokes that make you think, and this one is one of those. I liked some of these so I’m sharing them with YOU. If anyone knows what comedian is using these, let me know.
Enjoy!
(Thanks to JR)
Ramblings of a Senior’s Mind
I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell phones that everyone has clipped onto their belt or purse. I can’t afford one. So, I’m wearing my garage door opener.
I also made a cover for my hearing aid and now I have what they call blue teeth, I think.
You know, I spent a fortune on deodorant before I realized that people didn’t like me anyway.
I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans!
I thought about making a fitness movie for folks my age, and call it ‘Pumping Rust’.
When people see a cat’s litter box, they always say, “Oh, have you got a cat?” Just once I want to say, “No, it’s for company!”
Employment application blanks always ask who is to be notified in case of an emergency. I think you should write, “A Good Doctor”!
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older. Then, it dawned on me. They are cramming for their finals.
Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words ‘The’ and ‘IRS’ together it spells “Theirs…”
As for me, I’m just hoping God grades on the curve.
A penny saved is a government oversight. (Priceless!)
The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.
The easiest way to find something lost around the house it to buy a replacement.
He who hesitates is probably right.
Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are XL?
If you can smile when things go wrong, you probably have someone in mind to blame.
The sole purpose of a child’s middle name is so he can tell when he’s really in trouble.
Aging: Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth, think of Algebra.
About
I am a nobody. If the different classes of America were color-coded, I would be in the yucky brown, one rung up from the bottom. I grew up in Naples, Florida and live near the Mississippi River now with my husband and two dogs. I am part of the slowly disappearing middle-class. I was a musician most of my life: drummer/singer/keyboards—but I retired before the plastic surgery flu hit. I have no degrees, which could be a good thing…depending on how you view our educational system. I do have three patents…but that really doesn’t make me a somebody. The one thing that is constant in my life is my OPINIONS, which i have more than perhaps even Carl Sagan could have imagined…mostly political. (yes…my ancestors were crabby buggers)
Hopefully other nobody’s will put their opinions on my site. But, if you happen to be a somebody, you’re more than welcomed to help out.
It’s my Nobody Opinion that Nobody’s Perfect, and Nobody Cares, that Nobody Knows why Nobody Wins, and when that happens, Nobody Wonders, why Nobody Flashes, why Nobody’s Fooled, but then Nobody remembers that Nobody ALWAYS Reports the truth.
You can email me at joyanna_adams@yahoo.com
Joyanna Adams
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