Joyanna Adams

Nobody’s Perfect: ME

Okay. This is going to be humbling, but not too long ago, things in my life got pretty disturbing.

My husband and I were just not getting along, so yeah, I fell in love with a man online. Realize this is very common as many of us spend hours on the computer. So, being myself, I decided to find out WHAT the hell was wrong with ME. After all, I always blame myself first no matter what. And that’s not good. It makes you wake up each day and …say, “It’s just another day in the life of myself.”

This man online made me feel alive. Pretty, wanted. Whereas after 32 years of marriage, we were at that standstill. No grandchildren, so we got dogs. I then realized that “Hey, he is so happy with those dogs, he’s has never ever shown me that much affection…maybe he never really loved me.”

He was running all over the house, happy as a little boy in a water park, playing Marco Polo with his buds.

Well, God jumps in when you need him doesn’t he? I got this book, which is the way I deal with any kind of pain: find answers…go read.

What Could He Be Thinking? How a Man’s Mind REALLY Works.” By Michael Gurian

WOW. EVERY MAN AND WOMAN IN THE WORLD...should read this book.

He explains right off the bat, how really different our brains are wired. And how hormones play such a big vital role in our relationships. How women get frustrated if men are not romantic, and how men really do bond with the sex act. How he is wired to compete, focus on ‘performance.

Here is a few examples from the book about the Performance Imperative: He claims that the biological male foundation is laid for a performance imperative:

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The workaholic man. The man competing constantly. The man pushing his child to be his or her best. The man who sacrifices his life for others based on a suprme principle he believes in. The man who believes he is worthless unless he feeds his family. The man who sits watching a sunset, but only for a moment, then moves back to his job. (Yes, testorsterone…it’s real.)

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First, I thought well yeah: Women still want the hero, the provider, the Prince that comes to save her. AND YET…that’s a high gate for most men to jump over, especially now. I remember my best friend Shelly and I went to Disneyland in California back in the 70’s. And we were sitting on the steps of Sleeping Beauty’s castle, and watching the crowds exit at midnight. We talked about how we had been sold the story of the man coming to rescue you by Disney. How it was a big lie. Looking back on it now, I realize that’s the trouble with a lot of the male/female relationships now…as females we were raised on these Disney themes. Life isn’t like that. Many times the man just has too much on his mind to remember, doesn’t mean he does not love you…it’s just he is wired to keep his own stress from the day from not spilling over. Now the men play video games…go right pass the wives, and take out the day’s stress…it works.

Recently, I watched a video on Youtube, where Elon’s Musk’s first wife talked about how they lost their first son to CIDs. And she wanted to talk about it and he didn’t. What SHE didn’t know is that he dare not talk about it. He had companies to run. Men’s brains are designed NOT to talk about such a painful event. Women on the other hand MUST. She didn’t know his brain. He was suffering just as much as she was, but to talk about it would have destroyed him. She should have talked about it to a girlfriend or mother, or anybody but him. Emotions are not registered well in a man’s brain. They are just not wired for it. This book explains the male’s brain in scientific terms…and how hormones play a big part, and how the woman’s brains are always lit up.

WE ARE SO DIFFERENT.

The feminist movement has done more to damaged so many things that are now called woke. And that was a political movement DONE to destroy the family. And that’s another blog.

I just gave you jsut a taste of the book. It devles deeply into the facts of our physical differences, facts that cannot be ignored. And yet, they are.

In conclusion, I have been thinking all along that my husband didn’t love me. After reading this book, I can’t blame it all on him. Maybe I didn’t love him? Maybe this man I met online was a wakeup call to reexamining my life…and trying to understand..why both men and woman should try to understand the real reason’s we can’t seem to live up to each other’s expectations. And he goes into great detail.

So, I’m sorry that at my age, I didn’t read this book sooner. Many couples figure this stuff out, and live until “death do they part.” I didn’t. I have just been on cruise control. Not really living.

I’m just sad that I didn’t wake up to these facts earlier, back when Shelly and I were sitting on the steps of Disney’s Castle.

But then again…fairy tales sometimes do come true. Men have porn, women have fairy tales of romance…maybe that’s what keeps us all being able to stand each other.

Or not. (Maybe we just need to all chill.) And remember…mother nature knows best.

After all, want to see what a REAL man can do? (See below)

Ladies…watch and enjoy. When you can watch a REAL man build this world…love him for that. Because baby, it will make the world all that much better. And remember, he is also doing it for you. Be proud to be a woman. It’s okay to feel those emotions, but remember…mother nature is still here…no matter what woke agenda they are pushing on us all.

July 29, 2024 - Posted by Joyanna Adams | Uncategorized | Books, Feminism, love, relationships, women