If Spiderman is Gay, Does that mean that Flash is the FTD Florist?
Nobody’s Absurdities, No. …92
It’s been a while since I did an absurdity, and I can’t think of anything better to start up again with than the new Spider Man comic book character.
He’s black, he’s Spanish…and like Stan Lee himself..he might be gay.
First off: Besides the obvious social engineering aspects of creating a character to influence upcoming young minds…I find it an insult. Not that young Latinos, Blacks and Gays shouldn’t have superheroes in their comic books, they should have all that they can muster.
What bothers me, is—Why continue a WHITE guy from Brooklyn, kill him off, and change the character into a politically correct new B/S/G being?
Why not invent a whole new comic character? It’s like saying, “Hey, get rid of the white guy, it’s the black/Latino/gay turn now. ”
It’s pretty plain: money. They already have the whole Spiderman thing copyrighted, trademarked, merchandized,— and Stan Lee is according to most gay sources…gay himself. But…then why did Stan Lee have to go to the gay area, when all these years he has kept his superheroes very hetersexual?
Most of us have had, and do have gay friends: We love them..they are in our families, our jobs, our beauty parlors. BUT, they are not the majority of the people. The reality is: we don’t want a gay superhero, not because we all hate gays, but simply because it’s human nature to want to identify with the superhero…and if that superhero is GAY, it very hard for a heterosexual to get into it.
Make of it what you will…but many people associate gay with: the softer side. Having said that, the new James Bond, Daniel Craig, who we were told was gay, and acted very masculine, much to everyone’s surprise, just got married to a woman, and it’s not the first time he married a woman. So, he was NOT gay, but they told us he was. Why is that again?
Spiderman has always been for kids. Why even mention his sexuality? We hurt the whole society by forcing little kids to learn about the difference between gays and straights, and its being done in all our schools without the parent’s consent. They don’t be even need to thinking about “sex” at a young age.
But that doesn’t matter. The purpose is to get all kids used to the gays…and perhaps, making more of them in the future. Not to mention, get the blacks to assimulate with the Spanish.
This– let’s make everybody gay, and gay is the new normal–-is going to backlash someday, as it has in Sao Paulo, Brazil. Some heterosexuals want to have a “Heterosexual Day” parade.
Sao Paulo Mayor Gilberto Kassab must sign the legislation for it to become law and has said only that he is studying it. His office declined Wednesday to say whether he supports the proposal. The legislation’s author, Carlos Apolinario, said the idea for a Heterosexual Pride Day is “not anti-gay but a protest against the privileges the gay community enjoys.” In a recent report, the gay rights group Grupo Gay da Bahia said 260 gays were murdered last year in Brazil, up 113 percent from five years earlier.
And why it that? Just your typical gay-hating going on? Nope. Every year in Brazil all the gays of the world come down and put on their pretty girl costumes…and the straights are tired of it. What’s fair is fair.
Will we get the same thing here in America, a few heterosexual parades?
Can Spiderman swallow an elephant?
No, but we will get the New Spiderman: who will, you can be sure, have a MUCH prettier costume, have a Spanish name, and no doubt be able to rap while he’s spinning spider webs.
Will Mary Jane Now become Merry John?
Nobody Thinks the new Spiderman will be the biggest hit next year in Brazil, just in time for the Olympics.
What do you think?
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I am a nobody. If the different classes of America were color-coded, I would be in the yucky brown, one rung up from the bottom. I grew up in Naples, Florida and live near the Mississippi River now with my husband and two dogs. I am part of the slowly disappearing middle-class. I was a musician most of my life: drummer/singer/keyboards—but I retired before the plastic surgery flu hit. I have no degrees, which could be a good thing…depending on how you view our educational system. I do have three patents…but that really doesn’t make me a somebody. The one thing that is constant in my life is my OPINIONS, which i have more than perhaps even Carl Sagan could have imagined…mostly political. (yes…my ancestors were crabby buggers)
Hopefully other nobody’s will put their opinions on my site. But, if you happen to be a somebody, you’re more than welcomed to help out.
It’s my Nobody Opinion that Nobody’s Perfect, and Nobody Cares, that Nobody Knows why Nobody Wins, and when that happens, Nobody Wonders, why Nobody Flashes, why Nobody’s Fooled, but then Nobody remembers that Nobody ALWAYS Reports the truth.
You can email me at joyanna_adams@yahoo.com
Joyanna Adams
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Politically correct, is that even correct, do we not have enough nonsense going on. Oh we are so afraid of saying or doing anything Politically wrong, but hey if you are White, well to heck with what you feel is politically right??!!! I have no problem with a mixed version, if that is what makes you happy, so go for it. But come on, make your own version, do not play off an established story and character that has been around how long?!!! Gee we had, notice I said had , a man’s club, a men’s college,womans college, men playing football, whatever, now we Have to have women in everything, building stuff, racing cars; throwing that ball, people crying oh my I am not an american, but I want this that and then more and jump, and we do, heck pretty soon we will have co-ed bathrooms, hey ,we may already and I am just too old to know the latest fad, possibly??? Why does everything that worked , now have to be changed and improved, and am talking “Everything”, people, get a life and help change where change can really do something good and positive. 🙂 little nic picking do gooder’s, and that is my opinion,plus maybe a lot more think that way, then anyone wants to say??!!
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SUPERMAN SEEKS JUSTICE
Superman has been missing from Action for several years now. People watch the skies and their calls for help go unanswered. “Where are you, Superman”, they cry.
Something Changed.
He found love in the arms of Mercury work-experience journalist, Lois Lane.
“Oh, Superman, you are so Super”, she sighed.
“You’re pretty good yourself. Lois” he reassured her,
“even if I am carrying the Problems of the World on my Super shoulders”.
They settled down to married life together. Of all the places in the world to live she chose Tasmania. “I feel so Safe at Home here”, she said. “But I can make sure you are safe anywhere, Lois” he offered, “I am the Super-guy that helps everyone. I am even coaching the kiddies footy and building a new church from recycled string..
“Ah, but Darling, you don’t want to make me mad, do you?”, she argued.
So they moved to Hobart. And it hasn’t been happy-ever-after for him, or you. Happiness didn’t last long. “Oh, Superman, you take so little notice of me”, she cried after six months. “Its been one disaster after another. What about meeee?”
“You belittle my important career”, she complained. “You never take me flying anymore; you refused to beat-up that nasty sub-editor who rewrote my article on Women’s Rights; you think more about saving foreigners’ lives than doing the hoovering and why do you tell me not to iron your underpants?”
Superman took to hoovering and speaking stern words to meek sub-editors and rescheduled his arrival at some of the smaller train crashes and minor earthquakes.
He tried to fit an hour or two’s flying for Lois, building up to daily around the world trips to shopping Malls in Dubai and Rome.
But Lois became even more unhappy and phoned the cops.
“Oh, help me, please, Superman ‘looked’ at me and it ruined my hair”.
The cops waited until Superman returned from a Tsunami in Asia where he blew back the wave, and catching him by surprise they Maced him. It took 15 of them, with dogs, and three Taser shots to subdue him.
They waved the ‘Safe at Home Act’ in his face.
“Gotcha, Superman, ya barstard. Ya missus told us all about how you beat her up and won’t let her work. And she say’s you says she make a crap job of the ironing.
Its the pokey for you, sunshine”.
“But Officer”, protested Superman”, I didn’t. I don’t need creases in my superundies”
“Resisting arrest, ya barstard.!! All the evidence we need ”, they cried. They put their size 10 boots in, handcuffed him with Kryptonite and threw him in the Jailhouse.
The Official Response.
It took three months in the pokey, as bail wasn’t allowed under the Act that made Lois ‘feel’ safe, before Superman’s arse was hauled before the Magistrate. Half an hour of Lois’s imaginary complaints were heard. She used her journalistic skills. Inventive.
“He neglected me, preferring to spend a whole day with 2000 Brazilian hussies and their children in a mud slide. And he was away all night cavorting with some Armenian hussies just because a tiny earthquake knocked a house or two down.
He’s MY Superman.
But he gives me these ‘looks’ whenever I try to communicate my feeeeelings”
The Magistrate listened carefully. “You have correctly followed the Procedures,
Poor Woman”, he said. “What a brute. No need to prove anything my dear”.
“EMOTIONAL ABUSE”, the headlines read. Another $73 million of taxpayers’ money was ordered to be spent on Domestic Violence advertisments for the tele.
“SUPERMAN ABUSES WOMEN”, said the next day’s Mercury headlines. Thirty other women came forward, all claiming that Superman had ‘looked’ at them too.
A police Benchmark was set to arrest 100 men a month wearing
underpants outside their trousers.
“PERVERTS in HOBART”, said the sub-editor, trying to get back in Lois’s good books. She was promoted for his creativity. Bank robbery investigations were rescheduled by the Commissioner of Police, and Myer’s Menswear Dept was staked out for eight months around the clock by a team of SWAT cops.
There were no reports of the following Family Court hearings (forbidden, of course, under the Family Law Act) after Superman had a Violence Order imposed and was forbidden to use any powers that could be possibly used within 15,000 kms of Lois’s home: the one he’d bought. He lost that. And the furniture. She demanded a car too saying she needed one as she was used to travel. He was ordered to provide. Thankfully there were no children or it would have been the last time he saw them.
Far too dangerous !
His lawyer billed him for 600 hours work at $350 an hour. + phones. And for hers too.
Broke and homeless, without a licence to use his skills, forbidden to fly anywhere, even ‘look’, his body declared a ‘weapon’, his super-cape confiscated,
Superman deteriorated quickly.
Faster than a speeding bullet, in fact.
“Lois lied” he said to anyone who’d listen. But as Judy Jackson the AG had said,
“Complain? Well of course he complains. He’s just a man”.
The DPP, President of the Law Council and Supreme Court Judge, the same.
Men!! ™
To be a Man in Tasmania, is not Safe.
Even Superman is dispossessed
Just on an Accusation.
Lies do Fine.
You Stand No Chance
(This was a pamphlet I made some years ago and distributed all over Hobart, our State Capital. I even put about 200 on the ferry for visitors coming here)
🙂
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