Joyanna Adams

To Wine, or Not to Wine

Nobody Cares

Please. Tell me somebody else besides me does this:

I was watching some program on the HGTV channel, and it was about this married couple who was buying an apartment in New York. He looked…Arab, and she was like a blond model. Anyway…YOUNG…too young to be forking out $10 million for an apartment. And the agent showed them three places, all up in that price range. One place alone…had a hallway that was as long as a football field, and about 15 bedrooms… They fell in love. The kitchen was half the size of my house.  

Now, the whole time I am thinking: 1st…How in the world did these two twenty- year- olds get so much money?: and 2nd…Why is it that rich people seem so…very ordinary? When the agent said it would be ready in three months, the girl sighed and pretty much demanded that she wanted to move in sooner, because…”I’m so tired of all the toys.” she said.

Oh. Gee. Must be tough to want to move because you’re tired of your kids TOYS getting in the way. That’s a reason to buy a $10.9 million dollar New York penthous apartment if ever there was one.

 So, I take it this woman had plan to put her kids (who were all of two to three) down at the other end of that football length  hall, and it would be as if they were in another state, and she was imagining all her time being spent waaaaaaaaaaaaay off in the other side of the gigantic apartment ….where toys would not be a problem.

When a woman from the poorer class has a “toy” problem, she makes the kids either pick them up, or she throws them in the basement, near the Christmas tree.  Really, how hard can this be? Rich people just buy a bigger house.

There are no words that I can explain for me to understand the complete lack of “IQ” for people that have so much money. But then…all you have to do is look at Michael Moore.

Wait…..forget I said that. I should NOT have said that…I might have nightmares.

Which brings me to this: Penfolds of Australia had made the most expensive bottle of wine in the world, or so they claim.  The wine has no corks or screw tops, so for $168,000, Penfold will send a man to your house to open it for you with a silver tool.

I’m not all convinced that wine drank from a $168,000 bottle is all that much different that one from an old jelly jar.

Poor people all over the world have been drinking cheap wine and not tripping over toys for hundreds of years. They also drink wine, and do trip over toys, but NEVER do they feel they have to move.

And so now…I think it’s time for somebody on TV to invent a new TV program: House Swap. Let some poor people go live in a mansion, and let the rich people live in the poor man’s house. And then, spread some toys around the floor, and make the rich people drink cheap wine, and poor people drink expensive wine, and see which couple loses it first.

Somebody tell HGTV. I’m tired of being tortured.

June 30, 2012 - Posted by Joyanna Adams | humor, Uncategorized | Humor