Tucker Barnes: Send That Man to Washington!

Nobody’s Opinion

Tucker Barnes, the Cesspool Reporter who got sent out to stand in the middle of Hurricane Irene, and make his immemorial moment in Weatherman History, will forever be the most exciting thing that we will remember about Irene. Mayor Bloomburg, ‘President’ Obama, even Ann Coulter’s pick for President, Chris Christie, will be long forgotten…but not this guy.  The poor guy, either didn’t know it, or didn’t want to report it— All that foam splashing in his mouth and down his shoes was actually raw sewage. This of course shows you how ridiculously controlled our TV’s are. A REAL news station would have said this:

“Hurricane Irene is showing just how badly our sewer system is working. See all that stuff hitting our Tucker? That’s raw, nasty smelling, sewage folks.”

But, no…the meteorologists who we all ASSUME would have known what that stuff was, since becoming a meteorologist takes a lot of study, would have known that it was sewage. But he tells Tucker that it was “some kind of organic material.” In a politically correct world, “organic material” is just a nice name for raw sewage, and would also be another name for many current politicians for that matter.  In fact, I think I’m going to start calling them all that.—“organic material.” Except Al Gore. There is nothing organic about that man at all. Al is made out of “moronic material.” And he’s spreading it around like “organic material.”  You need titanium boots just to be around him.

Heaven forbid the taxpayers know how well their city officials keep tract of the “organic material.”

Here in Missouri, where we witnessed over 700 tornadoes last Spring, and also a MAJOR flood which destroyed thousands of homes on purpose…it was hard getting our pity-point check up. Most of the people who were killed in Irene, got hurt because they were OUTSIDE. A few had trees fall on them from inside. But really…damage was on property mostly. You can prepare for a hurricanes, not so a tornado.

Which reminds me…none of us have been prepared for the tornados of ‘organic and moronic materials’ that are sitting in the Capital acting like they care about us all. The whole place is foaming.

Still, Nobody Wonders how they pick and choose what disaster to make a big deal of? What bill are they sneaking through Congress that we don’t know about?  Half of Texas burned down this summer, not much pity for those poor souls. To many of us out here in no man’s land, it all looked like a overblown “dry run” for something else. What…we can only imagine.

Still, Governor Chris Christie, of New Jersey,  was full of warnings:

“I’ve got to imagine that the damage estimates are going to be in the billions of dollars, if not in the tens of billions of dollars,” Christie said in an interview with NBC’s “Meet the Press” program.

And Obama was more than concerned, something he has not been for weeks.:

“Many Americans ares till at serious risk of power outages and flooding, which could get worse in the coming days as rivers swell past their banks,” he added.

So, Texas can burn, the midwest can flood out, but the biggest disaster of the year is Hurricane Irene. Nobody Thinks the Democrats must really need the votes of the Eastern Seaboard in the next election. They might have to put Tucker Barnes on the White House lawn. The “organic material” coming out of that place makes Irene look like a harmless fluffy raincloud.

August 28, 2011 Posted by Joyanna Adams | conspiracy, democrats, disasters, Natural Disasters, Obama | Humor, media, Obama, weather | 1 Comment