Nobody Knows: Sign-up Numbers, Earthquakes, Putin, Wall Street, and Fake Camels

Nobody Knows

It’s been another week of great mysteries—which included why would ANYONE tell Joe Biden that he has the best looking facial skin in the world on National TV?….Let’s get started:

Nobody Knows: Today Obama took a big victory speech at the White House, which was more than annoying, it was silly. According to him, Obamacare signed up 7 million people  …and he laughed with his big silly grin when he proclaimed there WERE no death panels!

(What? Do you think he’s stupid? Technically, he’s right. You will die when you are refused care, it’s already written into the law.)

This is, of course all baloney, because Obama lied about Benghazi, he lied about everyone keeping their doctor, he lied about Fast and Furious, he lied about Buddy Love, and Reverend Wright and…when doesn’t he lie?

When he’s sleeping.

It’s being said that Obama has spiked the football once again by fudging the numbers, because Obamacare is all about force. The biggest lie is that those people are going to get “affordable” health care.

The moon will disappear from the sky before THAT happens.

Nobody Knows what caused the earthquakes in California and Yellowstone last week, but some are suggesting the Kim Jung Un was detonating nuclear bombs under the ocean for fun because North Korea had one too, so maybe that fault line is getting a bit of a push from Kim Jung. (Update: Another one–8.2 off of Chile)

And that’s not all we don’t know. The great lover of redheaded basketball players decided to shut off some rounds of fire at South Korea:

“North Korea fired 500 rounds of artillery shells over more than three hours, about 100 of which fell south of the sea boundary, South Korean Defense Ministry spokesman Kim Min-seok said. South Korea responded by firing 300 shells into North Korean waters.”

Since Obama has made sure that we can fight only one war at a time, if Kim Jung tries to invade South Korea, at the same time that Putin is invading Europe, what ‘war’ will Obama decide to fight?

(HINT: The war on the 18th hole. )

Nobody Knows, but we DO know that both Obama and John Kerry will declare that “This is just not how any state should act in the 21st century.” assuring the world that they—can look important saying absolutely ridiculous things. .

And speaking of Putin…

Nobody Knows why we have stopped talking about Putin? Which country will Putin go for next? According to a guy who used to work for him, he has a BIG list:

“Parts of Georgia, Ukraine, Belarus, the Baltic States and Finland are states where Putin claims to have ownership. “It is not on Putin’s agenda today or tomorrow,” Illarionov said. “But if Putin is not stopped, the issue will be brought sooner or later. Putin has said several times that the Bolsheviks and Communists made big mistakes. “

Nobody Knows if someday, some future President of the United States will say: Obama made some big mistakes..”  referring to Putin taking back Alaska and Mexico taking back half the country.

And speaking of taking back half the country….

Nobody Knows if Obama learned to spike the football from the big bankers on Wall Street. It was reported on 60 minutes this week that SOMEBODY spent $350 million on a super cable network on Wall Street–basically rigging the stock market for a few select people. These computers were just a few milliseconds faster, but it was enough to rip billions of dollar off of investors: (see video) by Michael Lewis.

Michael Lewis is not talking about the stock market that you see on television every day. That ceased to be the center of U.S. financial activity years ago, and exists today mostly as a photo-op. This is the stock market that Lewis is talking about; the one where most of the trades take place now, inside hundreds of thousands of these black boxes located at more than 60 public and private exchanges, where billions of dollars in stock change hands every day with little or no public documentation. The trades are being made by thousands of robot computers, programmed to buy and sell every stock on the market at speeds 100 times faster than you can blink an eye. A system so complex, it’s all but invisible.

Michael Lewis: “The insiders are able to move faster than you. They’re able to see your order and play it against other orders in ways that you don’t understand. They’re able to front run your order. From Brad Katsuyama’s point of view, when he heard they were willing to spend that kind of money for milliseconds it told him the sums involved were vast. That was one of the first questions he said he had. He says, “All right, I’m getting ripped off. Everybody’s getting ripped off. But what does it add up to?” And I think when he heard the story of Spread Networks, he realized this is tens of billions of dollars we’re talking about.

Add to that:

American companies have stockpiled nearly a trillion dollars of cash offshore to avoid paying higher tax bills at home, according to an analysis released on Monday.

And last but not least…Nobody Knows whose bright idea it was to put a $400,000 glass camel (courtesy of the American taxpayers) in front of the Pakistan American embassy.

Nobody Wonders just how many days it will be before someone throws a rock at it.

Shall we take bets?

If anyone has any answers to these questions, or any other great mysteries of the universe, like what moisturizer Joe Biden uses—-please email Rachel Ray.

April 1, 2014 - Posted by Joyanna Adams | Barack Obama, corruption, disasters, Earthquakes, Russia, Uncategorized | corruption, Earthquakes, Kim Jong Un, Obamacare, Valdimir Putin, Wall Street