Joyanna Adams

Nobody's Opinion

Nobody’s Full Moon Rising

Nobody Flashes

Well…it’s a full moon alright. I was saying to myself, well Joyanna, you can’t write about the stuff you usually do because you are so busy calling auto centers and saying,  “Do you have any Chevy Impala’s?”  Yes,  I am pretty much sick of any kind of car that was ever invented. I’ve been to at least 30 dealers. The cars are starting to all look like booby traps for insanity.

My old 94 Cougar, (73,000m) got bombarded by hail, and it’s now…well..I don’t know where it’s at. I took it to a body shop, and my insurance told me it was not worth keeping. I’ve had some kind of a car since I was sixteen, and never been without one that I could get into and go.

I am…slighty crazy about NOT having a car.

Here we see some cars of the rich. Alice Walton drives a 2006 Ford 5-150. Ingvard Kamprad, Ikea founder drives a 1993 Volvo 240. Mark Zuckerberg has a black Acura TSX. And Bill Gates likes the Porsche 959.

So I ask you…is a 2011 maroon Impala too much to ask? See, not all the rich are ostentatious. I think Alice and I would really get along.

Which brings me to a blog, that I was thinking of writing, because I am so sick of everyone else in the world complaining that Americans are selfish because they all have cars, while the rest of the world have bikes. And I am hearing that stupid complaint more often.

Okay,…focus on the subject of cars Joyanna.

An American without a car is like a carpenter without a hammer.  I think Jesus said that. If he didn’t he should have.

And then, to make things worse, my internet went down….!!

“Hello” I said to the Charter tech guy, “I can’t get on during the day, but I can get on at night…what’ s up with that?”

“Sounds like a software problem to me.” he said.

And that’s why he gets paid the big bucks.

I went on one of my favorite sites tonight ( and coincidentally came upon an article which had the cars that the rich drive.  I will be thinking of the second richest woman in the world tomorrow as I continue my search for the “perfect” Impala. My logic tells me I have one week to find a car, and if I haven’t found one by the last day, I’m going to buy a bottle of cheap wine, drink the whole thing, and then pick the first one I like.

And PS…if I’m not here this weekend, it’s because my computer died. In that case, I’ll be sure and blame the next car salesman I see.

One other thing, Notice how the “face” fits the car? (Alice, that’s not an insult.) Am I crasy? Don’t these people LOOK like their cars? Am I getting punch happy? What?

May 4, 2012 - Posted by | humor, Uncategorized |

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