Joyanna Adams

Nobody's Opinion

Mitt or Newt? Paper VS Rock

Nobody Wonders
Let’s see..We’ve made it through a zillion debates and the State of the Union according to the Magic Obama Master, and the opposition group is down to four, with two frontrunners.

We have to pick:  Who’s the worst of the two Evil Republicans who are leading the pack that Obama should debate? That was the big question of the day.

 So far, Glenn Beck is NOT for Gingrich.  Marco Rubio…is not exactly for Gingrich. Mitt (VP here?) Ann Coulter, Mitt.  The Governor of New Jersey, Chris Christie…Mitt.
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Rush Limbaugh is for anybody who is not Obama. Judge Napolitano: Ron Paul— throw Oliver Stone in that and you have to wonder what happened to Mr. Stone? Has he quit drugs?
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On the Gingrich side: We have Michael Reagan, who’s father Ronald Reagan, didn’t even mention in his diary according to Mitt. Fred Thompson is for Newt. And a man who makes more sense most of the time than all of the above put together: Thomas Sowell picks Newt.

He says between the two, both are not so good, but…he’s for Newt. And today, he was proven to be on the right track because if Nancy Pelosi can come out attacking Newt, then who does that make you want to vote for?

Nancy likes Mitt? Nancy…the woman who is responsible for Obama’s LIVE TO DIE Obamacare, prefers Mitt Romney.

I’d say that puts Newt in a good light. So…is this a trick?

Nancy Pelosi says that she knows for certain that Newt will not be President because she knows something so terrible that she threatens to tell the world, if they elect him as the candidate, and she WILL tell the world what it is, and he will lose. Hopefully, it’s not that he had a sexual affair with Michelle, because I think that’s about the only thing that would shock us.
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So, what could Nancy know? Just the fact that she has come out and threatened the man is enough to rally a few more million to vote for him, just because it was such a lowlife thing to do.

They must really want Mitt. Do we want to give them Mitt?

How are we going to decide between the two?

Nobody Suggests the Sam and Dean method:

January 25, 2012 Posted by | political races, Uncategorized | , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Obama’s State of the Union According to Mother and Child: Give HIM the Bill

Nobody Knows

This picture pretty much sums up what I was thinking as I was watching Obama’s State of the Union speech… Yep, that’s me. That’s how I felt afterwards, in shock to find out just how unprepared for the job of President this man was. It’s much worse than I thought.

If you missed it, then here’s an imaginary  summary from this little girl watching then State of the Union Address with her mama. She sums it up pretty nicely.

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Little Girl   Wow…look at Michelle mama… in that gorgeous blue dress. How much did that cost? Here comes Hillary…look, her hair looks like her mom did it. (I wish my mom could make my hair have a diamond tiara in it.)

Here comes Obama. He keeps saying over and over: “Good to see you.” He saying it to EVERYONE! Is he glad to see EVERYONE? Good to see you. Good to see you. Good to see you. Good to see you….

Oh my…look at that old lady give Obama the biggest hug I’ve ever seen. She’s so old. She’s on the Supreme Court. Why does SHE get such a big hug. What did Obama do for her? Wish he’d hug me like that.

Okay, that man behind him just told us he is the President of the United States. Didn’t we all know that? Why are they announcing it again? 

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Mama, look—everyone is standing up!

Mama   They are giving him a standing ovation because he is talking about our brave soldiers. I’m going to try that trick next time I give my speech at school.  EVERYONE always applauses the soldiers.

Little Girl   He says we all need to act like the soldiers. They have made us safe. He wants us to follow their example and act like the soldiers. His grandfather and grandmother were part of a larger part. Okay, we must be like soldiers. Dad told me soldiers obey orders, I guess that’s what he wants us to do.  

President says everyone should play by the same rules? Does that mean I can go on Air Force One, and play with Bo?

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Little Girl   President Obama says the State of the Union is getting stronger. HUH? MOM? He said that GM leads in world sales.

Mama   Because they sell and build in China, it has nothing to do with us sweetie.

Little Girl    He wants us all to give money to community colleges so that people can learn how to work. Some lady who got fired was given a job by some company who paid for her training. Her hair looks like cousin.  No one is going to have to pay for education…

He wants the bill.

He says the poor teachers work for no pay. He wants us to pay the good teachers MORE. He wants to make it a law that all kids HAVE to go to school until 18. What happens if I can’t? I might not live that long? Will they arrest me? Will Obama take my dad? He wants us to pay for more students to go to college, especially the illegal ones.

Am I illegal? He wants all illegal’s to stay here, and get free education, and send him another bill

He wants the bill. He will sign it. That’s what he said. He keeps saying that.

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Little Girl: Okay, now he is talking about energy. He is looking for oil…wait…I thought he told everyone they couldn’t do any oil searching after that big BP oil spill? He says climate change is not going fast enough so HE has told the military to BUILD a solar city? Or what? The military is going to build a future new energy city for over 3 million people? Will that cost money? The Navy will build it. Doesn’t the Navy build boats?

Wow…look Mama! Look at the light from the sky shining on him…it’s like a halo from god…God is shining beams of light on him!…ooooo000000…..

Mama   No honey, that’s just a special effect they do with camera’s. It’s dark there now sweetie. Trust me, that’s not from God.

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Little Girl: He still wants to build roads. Didn’t he say that a long time ago? And he wants to build another Hoover dam. Wow. Wait—- he said that he will not put up with mercury poisoning for the kids. Wait, all our new light bulbs are filled with mercury!

MOOOOMMMMMMM!!!!! Obama is going to arrest you! You are trying to poison me with mercury!

(Maybe mom doesn’t love me?)

Mama: No honey, I love you. I would never do that.

Little Girl: President Obama says he will not let those mean nasty bankers ever do that nasty stuff ever again:

He wants a bill.

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Little Girl: Okay, everyone who makes more than 1 million a year has to pay more. Like Him. He wants to pay more. He says he wants us to put more money in research:

He wants a bill!

He wants to outlaw insider trading. What’s that mom?

He just said it again: Send him the bill!

Wait…he’s quoting Lincoln. I just read that book by Mr. O’Reilly: He says he believes just like Republican Abraham Lincoln:

 “That government should do for people only what they cannot do better by themselves -and no more.”

Mmmmm I’m confused. He doesn’t like anything we do for ourselves.

Wow…mama…He said the executive branch is outdated. He wants more power..so that he can gather everything together into one big..something.

Mama: He wants more power honey..so that he can bypass Congress, and make all the laws himself.  

Mama

Little Girl: Is that a good thing mom?

Mama: No honey, it’s not.

Little Girl:  He is saying that if Congress doesn’t do anything he will do what he needs to do.

Does that mean that he doesn’t like Congress mom?

Mama: Yes dear

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Little Girl: Mama, Obama doesn’t like Iran. He likes Jews. He seems really mad at Syria. He says we are a Pacific power. He is also mad at Iran. He will do anything necessary to stop the bad guys. Mom…is Obama going to kill all those people? He killed bin Laden right?

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Little Girl: Hey, he talking about the Seals teams again mama. Everyone is standing up again and giving him a standing ovation!

Mama: Yeah, how else would he get one— pretty smart speech writer.

Little Girl: Obama says he has the flag that the guys used to kill Bin Laden mom…how come he gets to keep it? (Mama says nothing.)

He says we should all be like the army. Trust each other. SERVE.

Oh, there he goes. He looks sad. Those black ladies keep trying to kiss him.

MAMA: Okay, what did you learn tonight, baby?

Little Girl: I must be a good soldier, and trust Obama.  Obama is going to spend a lot of money helping illegal’s, and college students, and people losing their houses, and building new roads, and new cities with the Navy, and he wants us to send him the bill.

He must be a rich man mama, to want to pay the bill to all that stuff.

Mama?

Mama: What honey?

Little Girl: I though Obama didn’t like rich people? Does that mean he doesn’t like himself?

Mama: Well, he only likes the ones who give him money, honey, and I say Obama likes himself a..lot. So much in fact, that he wants to be our first King.

 Now let’s go fix that hair.

Little Girl: Mama…can I sleep in the dark tonight? I don’t think I want the light on anymore..I don’t want to get poisoned.

Mama: Sure baby, I think that’s a good idea.

January 25, 2012 Posted by | Obama | , , , , , , | 2 Comments

   

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