Nobody’s Imaginary Vacation!
Nobody Flashes
Since my last vacation happened BEFORE Disney died, I like to sit around and think of what kind of vacation I would think up for rich people and their friends…you know, the “Let me help you get a life” vacation? I could be a damn good travel agent for the average billionaire who is tired of going to the South Of France..
Here’s one that I think they would enjoy:
First: The owner of this vacation would pick 1,000 of his favorite people, and pile them on Air Force One outside of Dulles. All that would be needed is a simple $3 billion dollar campaign fund donated to Obama’s re-election money bags, and you would have the finest jet in the world take you and your friends to the thrilling land of S. Korea.
Come on…when was the last time you were in South Korea? The only catch is, “President” Obama might want to come along for the ride since he’ll go anywhere for a party.
Second: You will arrive in Panmunjom, the demilitarized Zone between North and South Koreas….Meeting you at the airstrip will be 250 brand new Mercedes Benz Mini-Vans to take you and your guests to the place where you are going to be spending the night.
Your vans will pull up to the Tentanic..yes, a tent that can hold 1,000 people. There you will spend the night being poured the finest champange, while Celine Dion performs her best hit from the Titanic movie: “I’ll be loving you…in all the old familiar places..back of cars where you embrace me….long agoooooo.”
Wait. No…well, she’s only going to be there singing the one hit from the Titianic, and you will be allowed to smash glasses and throw whatever happens to be on the floor. And don’t worry—Whatever happens in that tent: STAYS in that tent. 
Third: The next day– a real treat! Golf. In pairs of four, everyone will get to play the most dangerous golf course in the world, which sits in the demilitarized zone between North and South Korea. There is only one hole to play: a par three..192 yards, but the rough is filled with land mines! Think of the fun bets you could win by challenging the other team to go in and get his ball! 
Forth: Be sure and ask the “President to play. Donate another $ 5 billion to his campaign.
Fifth:After that fun game of golf, everyone will get back in their Mini-vans and head off to the nearest Ocean. There you will all be given your very own submarine to explore the sea in. Those that do NOT want to participate in this event, have get to sit on the beach and smoke Lamborghini cigarettes, if they like. (One pack: $2,700)
At the end of the day, when all the subs are discarded, everyone will get back in the Mini-vans to get back on Air Force One. Be sure and tell the pilot that the President in on board. If he isn’t, don’t worry. You gave him enough money to get a ride back to the states. Let him buy his own damn plane. 
Hey…did you have fun! Nobody thanks you for traveling on Nobody’s Imaginary Vacations! (Thanks to LuxuryLaunches for all the inspiration!)
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About
I am a nobody. If the different classes of America were color-coded, I would be in the yucky brown, one rung up from the bottom. I grew up in Naples, Florida and live near the Mississippi River now with my husband and two dogs. I am part of the slowly disappearing middle-class. I was a musician most of my life: drummer/singer/keyboards—but I retired before the plastic surgery flu hit. I have no degrees, which could be a good thing…depending on how you view our educational system. I do have three patents…but that really doesn’t make me a somebody. The one thing that is constant in my life is my OPINIONS, which i have more than perhaps even Carl Sagan could have imagined…mostly political. (yes…my ancestors were crabby buggers)
Hopefully other nobody’s will put their opinions on my site. But, if you happen to be a somebody, you’re more than welcomed to help out.
It’s my Nobody Opinion that Nobody’s Perfect, and Nobody Cares, that Nobody Knows why Nobody Wins, and when that happens, Nobody Wonders, why Nobody Flashes, why Nobody’s Fooled, but then Nobody remembers that Nobody ALWAYS Reports the truth.
You can email me at joyanna_adams@yahoo.com
Joyanna Adams
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Joyanna Adams 
Holidays for the rich, or at least well heeled.
I have sometimes wished I could do some of the tours I see advertised in the Spectator, where one gets on a modest-sized boat and is taken to and guided around ancient sites, along with others who are interested in spending their time and money on that sort of thing. A well educated ‘expert’ in the period and location usually accompanies.
I like the idea of lazing on the boat in azure waters and then being shown the wonders of Rome and Carthage and Greece. Of course, I would intersperse the boat bits with flying from one place to another in a Icon A5 which enables a chap who enjoys a pipe, to fly with the window open.
Late morning rises would have to be built in as would the evening lighting of ancient ruins. Just for my benefit, of course.
I recall visiting the ruins at Ephesus many years ago. I was quite poor at the time and the bus trip from Istanbul took most of my cash. So there was no lunch in prospect. But I (we – my newish Bride at the time) joined a small group of American tourists who had a guide. At lunch we sat with them and those nice folk took it upon themselves to share their left-overs with their starving Aussie hangers-on.
It would be a pleasure to pass on that generosity to others.
Ephesus was just magnificent. Marble street and columns all along. I understand St Paul had a few pen-pals there a longer time back.
Other holiday plans include a trip to St Louis just so I can knock on your door one sunny afternoon (remember, I rise at a gentleman’s hour) and spend some time in the company of my favourite American.
🙂
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