Joyanna Adams

Nobody's Opinion

Nobody’s Perfect: Coach Pete Carroll VS France

Nobody’s Perfect

This week was a no-brainer. We have two contestants who SHOULD have won their respective contests, but blundered beyond comprehension.

First Up: The coach of the Seahawks, Pete Carroll, who by making the wrong call in Superbowl history, lost the game.football history

This writer sums it up …perfectly:

It was the height of stupidity, the epitome of idiocy, moronic nirvana.

It was a mistake of monstrous and monumental proportion, the Great Wall of dumb surrounding the Grand Canyon of dumber.

It went down in flames, and it will go down in history, quite simply and simple-mindedly, as “The Call.”

It was, by acclamation and without argument outside the Seattle Seahawks brain trust, the most imbecilic, senseless, defenseless, half-witted, empty-headed, brain-dead call in the history of organized football – and every other sport known to man in the history of the world.

And then there’s France.

France, has the reputation of being number one in the world of fine cuisine. The French got that honor right after they got rid of the guillotines and gave the government back to the rich Kings, and put the chefs back to work.

But this week…the French LOST the international chef contest! In fact, it placed…

Get your forks ready…7th!

From the National Post:

PARIS — It is considered to have one of the finest cuisines in the world. But France faced gastronomic humiliation after it failed to make the podium on home soil in a global cooking championship.

Norway won this year’s gold medal in the Bocuse d’Or, a contest often described as the World Cup of chefs. France only managed to muster seventh place in the competition in which chefs must “demonstrate creativity, spontaneity and the mastery of their art”.

Rubbing more salt into the wound, America – home of fast food and “le hamburger” – took silver, a historic first, with Sweden clinching the bronze.USA second

This is truly epic: America, land of chicken McNuggests, Whoppers, sloppy Joes, and onion rings, came in…second.

This could be an international crisis.

So, who wins the Nobody’s Perfect Award for the week?

How did our losers handle their defeat?

Nicolas Davouze, the main French Chef, who had high hopes for his “facon grenobloise and guinea fowl truffee petites farces bourgeoisis” said:

“Whatever happens, I have no regrets. I gave everything.”

(He forgot to put salt on the truffee petites, I’m sure of it.)sea hawk

Coach Carroll said:

“We were going to run the ball in to win the game, but not on that play. I didn’t want to waste a run play on their goal-line guys. It was a clear thought, but it didn’t work out right. The guy (Butler) made a play that no one would have thought he could make.”

(Evidently the ONLY person in the world who didn’t imagine what would happen was Pete Carroll. )

Who wins the Nobody’s Perfect Award for the week?

The French have held the tradition of making god awful crepes stuffed with cream crudités a la fish for ages, and will continue to win, all they need to do is get new judges next year.

Pat Carroll’s “call’ on the other hand, will NEVER be forgotten. Not even in France. Not even while dining out at the finest restaurants in all the world, right now, at this VERY moment people are eating their dinners and saying—-CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT CALL?

Congratulations Pete! You may have lost the Superbowl but you have won the Nobody’s Perfect Award for the week!

I suggest if any of us happen to run into Pete, we all buy him a drink, and suggest he take a nice long trip to France, where he will feel…more at home where he can share a heartfelt cri de coeur. (cry in French.)

There’s always next year.

 

 

February 2, 2015 - Posted by | Food, Sports, Uncategorized | , ,

2 Comments »

  1. I would never eat a snail, unless I was stranded in North Korea and had no more shoes to eat. 🙂

    Like

    Comment by Joyanna Adams | February 3, 2015 | Reply

  2. A fine job of giving some context, Joy, but no cigar. Let us put at least one in proper context. I shall leave the football to you as the proper expert, and take the French food issue.

    No-one in France ate frog’s legs and snails before the glorious revolution. Not the most lowly chap without trousers nor wenchette sans coulottes. It was starvation that drove them that low. They had to find ways of making such awful fare palatable. It was all they had. No matter how they make it, they have yet to succeed. They did do better with cabbage. They have (now, since the Rev) 414 ways of cooking cabbage. They tell everyone that it is because they are such fine cooks, but again, just how many people eat cabbage? The French say that French cooking is the best. Get that? The French say it. Just why everyone else goes along with it, beats me. Perhaps most are just being kind, but I doubt it.

    There is an element of ‘The Emperor has no clothes’ about French cooking. Haute Cuisine? Tell them it is fine stuff and charge five times as much, and the snobs will flock to it.

    When did you last eat a snail?

    Like

    Comment by Amfortas | February 3, 2015 | Reply


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