Liberals Protesting…Whatever…
Nobody Gets Email
I love it when people protest but have NO idea what they are protesting against, don’t you?
To Wine, or Not to Wine
Nobody Cares
Please. Tell me somebody else besides me does this:
I was watching some program on the HGTV channel, and it was about this married couple who was buying an apartment in New York. He looked…Arab, and she was like a blond model. Anyway…YOUNG…too young to be forking out $10 million for an apartment. And the agent showed them three places, all up in that price range. One place alone…had a hallway that was as long as a football field, and about 15 bedrooms… They fell in love. The kitchen was half the size of my house. 
Now, the whole time I am thinking: 1st…How in the world did these two twenty- year- olds get so much money?: and 2nd…Why is it that rich people seem so…very ordinary? When the agent said it would be ready in three months, the girl sighed and pretty much demanded that she wanted to move in sooner, because…”I’m so tired of all the toys.” she said.
Oh. Gee. Must be tough to want to move because you’re tired of your kids TOYS getting in the way. That’s a reason to buy a $10.9 million dollar New York penthous apartment if ever there was one.
So, I take it this woman had plan to put her kids (who were all of two to three) down at the other end of that football length hall, and it would be as if they were in another state, and she was imagining all her time being spent waaaaaaaaaaaaay off in the other side of the gigantic apartment ….where toys would not be a problem.
When a woman from the poorer class has a “toy” problem, she makes the kids either pick them up, or she throws them in the basement, near the Christmas tree. Really, how hard can this be? Rich people just buy a bigger house.
There are no words that I can explain for me to understand the complete lack of “IQ” for people that have so much money. But then…all you have to do is look at Michael Moore.
Wait…..forget I said that. I should NOT have said that…I might have nightmares.
Which brings me to this: Penfolds of Australia had made the most expensive bottle of wine in the world, or so they claim. The wine has no corks or screw tops, so for $168,000, Penfold will send a man to your house to open it for you with a silver tool. 
I’m not all convinced that wine drank from a $168,000 bottle is all that much different that one from an old jelly jar.
Poor people all over the world have been drinking cheap wine and not tripping over toys for hundreds of years. They also drink wine, and do trip over toys, but NEVER do they feel they have to move.
And so now…I think it’s time for somebody on TV to invent a new TV program: House Swap. Let some poor people go live in a mansion, and let the rich people live in the poor man’s house. And then, spread some toys around the floor, and make the rich people drink cheap wine, and poor people drink expensive wine, and see which couple loses it first.
Somebody tell HGTV. I’m tired of being tortured. 
Finally: The Golf Swing Explained
Nobody Flashes
Don’t know how to play golf?
This, explains it all.
Nobody Flashes:Rich Cars Vs Poor Cars
Nobody Flashes
No matter what you hear about money…there are more people in the world who have an awful lot of it! And what do they do with their millions? Why buy expensive cars, of course!
Nobody compares what Ferrari is going to do to get into the Guinness Book of Records: They plan to gather the most Ferrari’s in one place, in the UK on September 15th. Their goal is to get 1,000, and so far they have 600 lined up. What does the common man do to get into Guinness? He makes his couch into a go-cart!
And if you think that the rich can’t think of anything to spend their money on…THINK AGAIN! There is the gold wrapped Mercedes-Benz in Dubai, and the gold wrapped Lamborghini Aventador LP700 in Miami! And yes, that’s REAL gold….you know, the gazillion dollars an ounce kind…but…if you don’t have the money for these beauties, remember, there’s always your own ingenuity.
Nobody’s Perfect: Jimmy Carter VS Elmo
Nobody’s Perfect
This week we have two very important world figures trying to take the spotlight with their grievances, Jimmy Carter and Elmo. I was going to go for Cher this week, because she keeps ranting that the Tea Party people are all racist… but…why? Elmo at this point is much more interesting. 
Let’s start with that pontificating putterer, x-President Jimmy Carter, who no doubt is still wondering if we have aliens on the planet, because he is looking for the Carter family tree. I’m convinced he could be of alien descent because I can’t think of any recent x President that dislikes America as much as he does.
Notice I said X American President.
Carter is STILL knocking America…and that’s because America threw him out of office because he put on his sweater one day in the Oval Office, looked the American people straight in the eye, and told America to turn down their thermostats and get out our ugliest sweaters, because we were basically all energy hogs and it was our fault (not his) that we had to wait in long lines to get gas.
It didn’t go over too well.
Once Ronald Reagan came to save the day, we couldn’t WAIT for Jimmy to go back to his peanut farm. But did he? Nooooooo, he had to continue to torture us with all his opinions…like how the election of Hugo Chavez was a good one. Once Jimmy Carter agreed to do an interview in Playboy, Nobody thought that if there were any redeeming qualities Jimmy might have had…class was not one of them. He has been one of the noisiest and litigious pathological anti American President ever to grace the Oval Office, but..yesterday–he just might have gone too far.
He is now attacking Obama…Lions and Tiger and Bears…OH MY!
Jimmy Carter, America’s 39 the president, denounced the Obama administration for “clearly violating” 10 of the 30 articles of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, writing in a New York Times op-ed on Monday that the “United States is abandoning its role as the global champion of human rights. In addition to the drone strikes, Carter criticized the current president for keeping the Guantanamo Bay detention center open, where prisoners “have been tortured by water boarding more than 100 times or intimidated with semiautomatic weapons, power drills or threats to sexually assault their mothers.”
Notice the words “intimidated.”
Actually, if a Muslim really believed that some American soldier was really going to sexually assault their mother, then he deserved to be water boarded for stupidity alone.
And even though Jimmy has protected Muslims all over the world, this time he has maybe stepped over the…x –tow the Party democratic line.
And then there’s Elmo. Evidently Elmo is claiming that the Jews are ruining the world, (see video) something Mel Gibson once said to a cop. So many kids were around while Elmo was losing his mind trying to tell people that the Jews were taking over, a guy in another stupid costume had to get him to shut up.
Who made the biggest blooper this week? 
How do you compare? I can’t. Both of them are stupid.
And speaking of stupid—Kim Kardashion had this to say about herself and the Virgin Mary:
“I think if I’m 40 and I don’t have any kids and I’m not married, I would have a baby artificially inseminated, I would feel like Mary — like Jesus is my baby. When I did want to have sex the first time, I was almost 15,” she told Winfrey — just like the Virgin Mary said in the Gospel of Matthew.
She told this to Oprah. Word has not come in if she was on drugs, or if the Catholic Church might be considering working with Kim to redo the Virgin Mary statues with Kim Kardashion statues ..or not. Somehow Kim completely missed the point that you have to be a VIRGIN to be Mary.
I’m beginning to think I should have compared Cher to Kim this week: The Botox Devil and the Virgin Mary.
Still somewhere I just know, that Jimmy Carter has lusted for them both.
Therefore, Elmo wins by default. Congratulations Elmo! Jimmy Carter and Egypt await you.
Nobody Flashes: Happiness in a Dancing AC/DC Cockatoo
Nobody Flashes
Nobody is as lucky as me. Upon hearing about the loss of my little parakeet Mango, a dear friend sent me this to cheer me up.
At least watch some of this if you can…this bird is incredible!
(Thanks to THE POWER!)
Nobody’s Email: The Candyman…
Nobody Gets Email
Okay…yesterday I had a dying parakeet and a dog with a limp foot. If you happen to be an animal lover you know how that goes.
So, let’s post this really fun video of a guy making fun of the government! And then, let’s all go swimming! This one is so much fun, I might learn it.
Enjoy!
(Thanks to Mona)
We Have the Chain, Where’s the Ball?
Nobody Flashes
When it comes to shoes, I haven’t put on a pair of high heels in over ten years…mostly because I had to wear them all the time. Right now. I’m a tennis shoe woman, and K-Mart does me just fine. BUT…Adidas is going to release a new sports shoe called the JS Roundhouse, and for $350 dollars you can strap those plastic shackles around your ankle and feel confident that no $%&% is going to steal them off your feet, and we all know that for $350, there is going to be a LOT of people who are going to want them. 
When I wore high heels, I ALWAYS looked for the ankle strap.
But not everyone is happy. Here’s a few comments:
“A chain on your ankle ain’t nothing good for nobody,” Sykes (NBA) said “Whether it be the Jews, the Egyptians, whether it be the African-American slaves, whether it be the Filipino slaves, anything with a shackle on your ankle shouldn’t be made fun of, or like it’s a cool thing to have.”
We showed the shoes to customers and workers at the store. Some say they are racist. Others say they’re just ugly. But no one seems to like them.
“You’re either talking about slavery, or maybe being in jail, but either way it’s glorifying something that no one should be proud of,” one customer said.
Nobody Thinks the designer is onto something here…in fact…since I see those boys all the time walking down the street with their pants falling off…I can’t imagine the horrible feeling they are going through..since I know the horrible feeling I am going through just watching them. So! Why not put some chains AROUND your neck, attached them to your belt…then you can wear those pants as low as you want and NEVER be afraid of them falling off!
Buy a pair of Adidas, rap a song about slavery, and make millions.
Nobody is glad to help out. 
Nobody Flashes 3 Important Events….
Nobody Flashes
Happy Father’s Day! 
Happy Bunker Hill Day!
Happy Birthday to ME!
Really….it’s Father’s Day, but it’s also my birthday and guess who gets to pick the movie? 
Nobody’s Fool: Mark Twain
Nobody’s Fool
After the Civil War and up until WWI, American went into a great ‘transformation.’ The cities exploded with factories, and new technologies, and the idealistic American dream of the lone rugged individual of the founders…were being uprooted. Big politics and big business came crashing in on the new dispensations: Tammany Hall, and the stock manipulators brought about “Black Friday” in 1869. Labor strikes came in 1873, and 1876. In 1886, there were more labor strikes in Chicago.
We went from an agrarian society to an industrial one. Then we got the oil and steel tycoons, and the start of the big humongous multinationals conglomerates we have today.
And one guy, had this to say:
“The eight years in America from 1860 to 1868 uprooted institutions that were centuries old, changed the politics of a people, transformed the social life of half the country, and wrought so profoundly upon the entire national character that the influence cannot be measured.” –Mark Twain
Nobody suggests that if you change those dates to 1992-2012, that statement would very much fit what we are seeing in America today.
We have gone from an agrarian society to a “service” one. (By design) 
America is more fascistic, the people more divided and diverse, our freedoms vanishing, and almost all of our institutions: the family, the churches, our government, and our schools, have been changed so profoundly upon the entire national character…that the influence cannot be measured.
Obama, and many of the globalists, want to change the national character. No more melting pot. No more America.
No need to offend others. 
What would Mark Twain have to say about Obama?
“When angry, count four: when very angry, swear.”
They have “banned” Twain’s masterpiece Huckleberry Finn from our kids…but, it was one of the most profound books against slavery ever written, which brings me to another Mark Twain quote:
“All you need in life is ignorance and confidence, then success is assured.”
So THAT’s how he became President.
Thanks Mr. Twain. 
Executive Orders: Paint it Black
Nobody Knows:
When Madonna decides to show her nipple in Turkey, why in the world would anyone care to know just WHY a President would have to sign…all these executive orders? Nobody Knows:
Executive Order 10990 allows the government to take over all modes of transportation and control of highways and seaports. (That way Obama can get all his Muslim friends out on planes…something George Bush did after 9/11. Also, if he doesn’t want you to leave the city, you will not be allowed to. Nice to know…start digging that hole.)
Executive Order 10995 allows the government to seize and control the communication media.(Yeah, and Nobody bets Rush Limbaugh will be the first to be taken over.) 
Executive Order 10997 allows the government to take over all electrical power, gas, petroleum, fuels, and minerals. (You think you will be driving in that truck that you piled high with guns, gas, and food in order to go to that cabin in the mountains? THINK AGAIN! Also, better throw grandma’s diamond in the hole…)
Executive Order 10998 allows the government to take over all food resources and farms. (And that will include your backyard cucumbers….Michelle will be there personally to collect. That hole is going to need beer. ) 
Executive Order 11000 allows the government to mobilize civilians into work brigades under government supervision. (So, Obama gives himself the power to make any person in the United States go to work picking those tomatoes the Feds might have missed. Better make that a BIG hole. )
Executive Order 11001 allows the government to take over all health, education, and welfare functions. (Uh…why is this an order? This is already in place.)
Executive Order 11002 designates the Postmaster General to operate a national registration of all persons. (Social Security Numbers can be stolen: Forehead barcodes–666!) 
Executive Order 11003 allows the government to take over all airports and aircraft, including commercial aircraft. (Okay…why would you need all the airplanes in the country again?)
Executive Order 11004 allows the Housing and Finance Authority to relocate communities, build new housing with public funds, designate areas to be abandoned, and establish new locations for populations. (Detroit will be relocated to Miami Beach.)
Executive Order 11005 allows the government to take over railroads, inland waterways and public storage facilities. (The Army will be floating down the Mississippi!) 
Executive Order 11049 assigns emergency preparedness function to federal departments and agencies, consolidating 21 operative Executive Orders issued over a fifteen-year period. (Every President wants just to have ONE department to answer to…his.)
Executive Order 11051 specifies theresponsibility of the Office of Emergency Planning and gives authorization to put all Executive Orders into effect in times of increased international tensions and economic or financial crisis. (Okay, who decides just exactly what the definition of increased international tensions is? What if Iran bombed Israel, but not us? Would Obama put in all his executive orders? And is he trying to cause this financial crisis?Well, yeah. Who comes out on top in this?)
Executive Order 11310 grants authority to the Department of Justice to enforce the plans set out in Executive Orders, to institute industrial support, to establish judicial and legislative liaison, to control all aliens, to operate penal and correctional institutions, and to advise and assist the President. (First off, they can’t “control” the aliens now…and second—How safe do you feel with Obama giving the job of arresting sheriff to Eric Holder? I’ll be painting myself black. ) 
Executive Order 11921 allows the Federal Emergency Preparedness Agency to develop plans to establish control over the mechanisms of production and distribution, of energy sources, wages, salaries, credit and the flow of money in the U.S. financial institution in any undefined national emergency. It also provides that when a state of emergency is declared by the President, Congress cannot review the action for six months.
Is that how he will grab the RICHES of the RICH?
Key words here: “undefined national emergency” which means the national emergency is anything the President deems it, and Congress can’t do a thing about it but hand over the whole country to the new Hitler.
Now…if you wonder like me why these executive orders were not blasted all over the news on the day they were signed, and you don’t care that these executive orders are among the most tyrannical rules ever put into law by one man, and digging a hole is not your idea of a fun time on a Saturday in June… then go ahead…you just want to see Madonna’s nipple?
Go here…Don’t worry…Be happy…do..dododo..do. do de dodedo…
I’m STILL Laughing…
Nobody Flashes
Remember that song by Elton John called “I’m still standing?”
Well…I’m still laughing after watching this.
Protecting Obama’s Back
Nobody Reports
If you are white, you will probably miss this ad put out by Obama to the black people to “protect his back” –He is asking for four more years of his continuing policies…of free stuff.
His big promise? He will get them college loans. What he doesn’t tell them, is that when they and IF they get out of college, the job market will be even worse than it is today, and what little jobs that will be left will go to the illegal Mexicans! You might have a degree, but you will have to move to China to get a job.
And as for keeping you on his Obamacare, even if you’re black, if you are over 60 and get cancer…you will have to wait in line for treatment just like the white people.
BUT…Obama wants YOU to protect his back!
And what does that back look like?
Nobody’s Perfect: Rivers VS Rickles Vs Lovitz
Nobody’s Perfect
In Hollywood, if you’re not a democrat, you are pretty much run out-of-town, and very few comedians can ignore an election year. Let’s compare shall we, three comedians and their opinions about Obama, and see which one is the MOST perfect:
FIRST: Joan Rivers…never met a liposuction she didn’t want, or an ugly dress she could ignore. Here she critiques the ongoing Republican race for the White House, and notice, when she finally criticizes Obama, Jane Lynch comes in to defend his gray hair. (?)
And then they both “bond” in their feminists glory of being born with uteruses…as if the man has no rights…He’s just a sperm walking–and then they go into the sex jokes…
I’m beginning to think they don’t have any…sex that is. I still like Joan Rivers, but she deserves to stay on the women’s channels, where she can talk about sex changes and viagra to her hearts content.
SECOND: You don’t go on David Letterman and cut down Obama, but that’s exactly what Don Rickles did…and when the Liberal audience was offended, he didn’t care. I’d say, Don Rickles has one up on Joan Rivers, in fact, Nobody would like better than to see Don Rickles tell a few Obama jokes to Joan Rivers.
THIRD: I saved the best for last. John Lovitz is a hilarious actor. His portrayal in the Wedding Singer of a band disco singer was so true to life, I almost couldn’t believe he was not some of the people I’ve seen on karaoke stages. But here, he really lets it go here, about how unfair it is to work hard, and then have a President who wants to take it away.
Lovitz wins the “Nobody’s Perfect, but You’re Pretty Close Award” for the week. This Nobody has now become an even BIGGER fan, and even Lovitz says the offers are pouring in from everywhere.
The contest—- wasn’t even close.
About
I am a nobody. If the different classes of America were color-coded, I would be in the yucky brown, one rung up from the bottom. I grew up in Naples, Florida and live near the Mississippi River now with my husband and two dogs. I am part of the slowly disappearing middle-class. I was a musician most of my life: drummer/singer/keyboards—but I retired before the plastic surgery flu hit. I have no degrees, which could be a good thing…depending on how you view our educational system. I do have three patents…but that really doesn’t make me a somebody. The one thing that is constant in my life is my OPINIONS, which i have more than perhaps even Carl Sagan could have imagined…mostly political. (yes…my ancestors were crabby buggers)
Hopefully other nobody’s will put their opinions on my site. But, if you happen to be a somebody, you’re more than welcomed to help out.
It’s my Nobody Opinion that Nobody’s Perfect, and Nobody Cares, that Nobody Knows why Nobody Wins, and when that happens, Nobody Wonders, why Nobody Flashes, why Nobody’s Fooled, but then Nobody remembers that Nobody ALWAYS Reports the truth.
You can email me at joyanna_adams@yahoo.com
Joyanna Adams
Comments
Anonymous on MTGA (Make TRUMP Go Away) ronita on MTGA (Make TRUMP Go Away) ronita on MTGA (Make TRUMP Go Away) Mrs. O on MTGA (Make TRUMP Go Away) Joyanna Adams on DAD: It Only Takes a Moment or…
Joyanna Adams 