Joyanna Adams

Nobody's Opinion

The Obama Administration: All-Star Lying Hall of Famers

Nobody KnowsMexicn flag

I was watching the National Anthem being sung at the All-Star game just a few minutes ago, and the camera man panned to a man holding an American flag, and I swear I saw some guy in front of that man, trying to block it with a Mexican flag. It happened so quick, I’m not even sure I saw it. (anybody?) The All Star game is usually pretty boring and I always wondered why the American League always seems to win. I thought the National League players were suppose to be the better league.

Nobody Knows where in the world I got that idea.

The American league is winning now, bottom of the seventh. No doubt they will win, again.

And speaking of winning:

Nobody Knows if Elizabeth Warren is going to challenge Hillary Clinton for the democratic nomination, but they WANT us all to wonder. Supposedly, Obama doesn’t want Hillary to follow him as President, and Warren is being groomed by Obama supporters to follow him…or maybe Hillary really does have a brain tumor– heart condition— blood clot— dementia..(did I leave anything out?) and is just making money.

They are NOW putting out the propaganda that Obama and the Clinton’s don’t get along. And Michelle and Obama never sleep together and he smokes and eats junk food all night when he goes to bed. And if he is still smoking why does he keep chewing gum?Wall street or main street

Nobody Thinks this could very well be all to make us THINK that Hillary isn’t like Obama at all and therefore more trustworthy. Yes, now the story is, the Clinton’s HATE him.

(All Star Update: Nobody Knows how many people didn’t GO to the All Star game in Minneapolis tonight due to the Polar Votex, but I do notice that they are not showing too many shots of the upper bleachers.)

And speaking of people haters, great liars, and people getting high..(I was wasn’t I?) Just go with it…

Harry Reid must be smoking crack with the President. He announced with great fanfare just this week:

“The border is secure,” he told reporters after the Senate Democrats’ weekly policy lunch.Harry Reid

He said this while thousands upon thousands of Hispanics floated across the border and took the Obama Bus to the nearest Wal-Mart.

Nobody knows WHAT border he was talking about, but I think it’s the one in front of the Senate Parking Lot.

(Note, I posted this because I think its funny that when found out they were MIGRANT workers with EBT cards, well, then, no problem. LOL! They STILL go to Wal-Mart who honors all government food stamps, and credit cards. Remember, both Hillary and Michelle were on the board of Wal-Mart at one time. )

Nobody Knows, (or did I rant about it? I don’t remember) but I caught a most nasty pneumonia last year at Wal-Mart, from some little Hispanic kid who was coughing all over the store. Now when I go to Wal-Mart, I take masks, gloves, baseball bats, stun guns, and I hire an ambulance outside just in case I catch Ebola.

Okay, I’m kidding. I can’t afford an ambulance. I can barely afford gas for my car. (I have illegals to save.)

But I DO walk around Wal-Mart as if it’s a mine field. And I do have ammo: masks, anti bacterial lotion, gloves, and Zinc spray just in case. (Thanks snopercod)

But, where was I?

Oh yeah…lies. And SPEAKING of lies—

UPDATE: They are having soccer commercial at the All Star Game. That’s almost a felony isn’t is? And WHY is everybody worshipping Derek Jeter retiring? Wasn’t he on steroids with Madonna too? Derek Jetter 2

As Cindy Adams would say: Only in New York, honey, Only in New York.

But, back to liberal and their lies:

We now know why Jay Carney got fired: Josh Earnest lies with much more humor.

White House press secretary Josh Earnest said Monday the Obama administration’s foreign policies in a number of areas have enhanced the world’s “tranquility” – a word that raised eyebrows as reporters pointed to situations in Gaza, Syria, Iraq, Iran, Ukraine and the South China Sea.

Sergeant Schultz

Yes, the world is absolutely floating in a sea of Obama bliss of tranquility. The whole world is so peaceful, Hamas is lobbing missiles at Israel, and blowing up people in Afghanistan, killing Christians whenever they can, and Jews, and even Basketball players can’t stay in one place.

If we get any more tranquility we’ll have to declare Obama the Prince of Peace. (Somebody send him a robe and some sandals. )

Does it matter if our President and his merry men think they are in an All- Star Game?

Will this lying game of madness END when Obama leaves the White House?

Nobody Knows: But I’m NOT giving up my bat.


July 16, 2014 Posted by | Barack Obama, baseball, imigration, Uncategorized | , , , | Leave a comment

It’s a New World Order…for Baseball

Nobody Wins

It was on the local news last night: Downtown St. Louis bars and restaurants, many already suffering from the poor economy, were laying off people, and most of hose businesses won’t make it.Ball parkvillage

The New Ballpark Village is so exciting and new, no one will be able to compete. The dead downtown is getting a new shot in the arm. And that’s a good thing, right?

St. Louis is a great baseball town. We have the perfect weather for baseball: the summer is long, the nights are hot, and there is nothing else left to do for the middle class. To sit outside, on a summer night, drink a cold beer, have a hot dog, and watch the game…it’s a good life.

I was a baseball junkie back in the 1980’s, and as I drove my yellow Firebird into the city to watch Hertzog’s team, I felt excited by the life of the city: the malls, the shops, the bars. Sure, there were certain streets you didn’t go into, but the city was thriving.

No longer. It’s dead. Full-blown comatose. The only reason to go downtown now, is for the game.Old Busch Stadium

Daddy Busch built my favorite stadium, that big beautiful Roman Coliseum., bought the team, rode his famous Clydesdale on opening day, waved his cowboy hat, and the city was his. If you got bored, you could walk around the whole stadium and just look down at the game from all over. It fit the Arch perfectly. Flying over the Arch into the city at night, the stadium was breathtaking.

And then, the old man died. His son could care less about owning a baseball team, so it was sold to some good friends of George W. Bush, who by the way, had ties to St. Louis. Prescott Busch, his grandfather, used to have his business not far from the old stadium

The new owner, William DeWitt Jr, who bought them in 1995 for $150 mil, decided just to tear a perfectly good stadium down….they wanted their own stadium, more fit for the NEW economy: Yes, the new stadium is filled with more boxes for the rich, and the poor, can only afford to sit way out in center filed.

To his credit, William Dewitt has made it into a huge money-making deal for…him. Owning a ball club can bring you riches you can’t imagine. Just ask George W. Bush, who made much of his wealth that way.

(but, back on subject)

The people who went to the ballgames could no longer afford to go. In other words, the rich investors who own the Cardinals, made a new stadium, where the rich have private parking, and will never run into the low life below them. Restaurants were all around the stadium, where the “middle” class could sit inside air conditioning and have any kind of food you can imagine, and watch the game on TV. In other words, many of these new stadiums have ways to “protect” the rich from the poor, and now, the ‘poor’ can’t even afford to go.

And when I heard about more people losing businesses downtown due to “progress” it was just another “change” I can’t even relate to.Beer

Anyone who grew up in St. Louis, has seen the slow death of downtown, and this is nothing new, but this Ballpark Village was suppose to have individual bars, privately owned, by many families, but now the news is out:

The construction of Ballpark Village represents the culmination the Cardinals vision for their investment in downtown St. Louis that began with the opening of the new, privately financed $411 Busch Stadium in 2006.

The Cardinals are developing Ballpark Village in partnership with The Cordish Companies.

Okay. The rich guys not only own the stadium, but they own the Ballpark village. It’s the New World Order, where thousands of small businesses will go under, and no one will be able to compete with the big boys who have the monopoly.

Because that’s what ballpark village is: A monopoly.

Nobody Wins with crony capitalism but the rich.

On the good side– If you can’t afford a ticket to the game, you can sit at the bar and watch the big giant screen. But you will still pay $10 for a beer.

On the bad side?

When the rich got together with their crony politicians, and decided to take manufacturing out of the country, and then decided America was going to be a service economy—Nobody ever dreamed who we’d all be serving. So…have a beer!

Or two…or three…or four….trickle up that ten dollars (500 percent markup) right to the top.





June 18, 2014 Posted by | baseball, New World Order, Uncategorized | , | Leave a comment

First Day of Baseball: Last Day for Obamacare Signup

Nobody Flashes

It’s opening day for baseball in America, and the last day to sign up for Obamacare before you ‘supposedly’ get fined. Which event got more boos? New York Mayor Bill de Blasio throwing out the first pitch? Or the Obamacare website which, once again, crashed twice. This pretty much sums up that reaction;

March 31, 2014 Posted by | baseball, humor, Obamacare, Uncategorized | , , | Leave a comment

Why the World is Filled With Dumb Blonds

Nobody Remembers

I was going to remember that the United Nations was started on this day, in 1945, and that today Brazil, France and Germany are appealing to the U.N. to stop Obama from spying on them.

But that would make a very boring story.dumb blond two

So, I’m going to tell a short story about baseball.

First: I had great parents. My parents were so trusting that when I was 17, I drove to Snowmass, Colorado all by myself. In fact I went all over the country by myself.  I’m not sure if it’s because they knew they couldn’t tame me, or if they were just hoping I’d met some rich guy,  (Probably a little of both.) But, when it came to men, sometimes I was just dense. I just didn’t see them being attracted to me at all. And so I married the first guy who wanted to marry me, because I didn’t think I’d ever get another chance.

Yeah, low self-esteem comes in buckets.

So of course that marriage lasted all of one year and three months. This story comes, right after the painful divorce. I was pretty lonely so I got hooked on baseball. I always went to the game by myself, only because, I’ve never really had girlfriends. I would work at night as a drummer, (in all guy bands) and during the day, I would go to the games. And I got hooked.

On the game of baseball.

Anyway, to make a long story short, here in St. Louis, Busch stadium was downtown, and I do remember one night, in the middle of July, the game lasted until midnight, and when a game runs overtime, you have a lot of drunks walking to the parking lot. It was a hot summer night, and I was in my usual short-shorts, which would bring cat-calls, and frankly, I was scared to walk to my car. It was just a gut feeling. After all, East St. Louis, is just a kick away from downtown.dark alley

So, I went to the nearest hotel bar. I thought, if I sat there long enough, the drunks would leave, and I’d have a safer chance once the crowd had cleared out. I’d rather walk in an empty parking lot and take my chances with the shadows.

After about 15 minutes, the bar started filling up with players…from the Dodgers. I was pretty shy around ball players..and so I tried to keep to myself. As I sat at the bar, a very distinguish older gentlemen sat next to me and started to talk. After about five minutes I told him I was only hanging around because I was scared to walk to my car.

“I’ll walk you to your car.” he said in a very jolly scene

So, since he had told me he was actually the official Dodgers Team radio commentator, on the road for the Dodgers, ( and he was famous…he told me that.) I figured he had to be safe.

“Really, would you?:  I said….”That would be great.”

So, we walked through the parking lot and got to the car, and I drove him back to the hotel, and then he said, “Hey, park here and come on in for another drink.”

Now, I’m not sure why I did, but looking back on it, I was flattered that someone famous had even been so nice to me, and I figured one drink was no big deal.  It’s not like I thought he was expecting anything else but conversation.  As I remember, he was pretty much the gentleman the whole time.

So back in we walked, and to my surprised, the whole room of ballplayers started laughing. He went over and said something to a few of them with a big grin on his face, and came back.dumb blond three

“So, why are all the guys laughing at you?” I asked.

“They wanted to know if I screwed you.” He said. “So I told them I did.”

To say I was embarrassed—– To say I was shocked, will let you know how much I trusted people to have decency, and what a dumb blond I really was. Boy, did I feel stupid.

The reality is, baseball players not only do steroids, but they spend many long nights on the road, and many of them have wives, and many of them screw around, and I knew that…but I really didn’t think that the radio star would want to tell an old high school lie. After all, Jack Buck would never do that now…would he?

Judge it or not, I thought the guy was a real creep for doing that…and I felt sorry that he had to lie to even make those young players actually think some young thing wanted to ‘do’ it with him for a walk to her car.

I told him he had no class, blushed, and walked out.dumb blond 1

Now I look back on that and feel sorry for the man. Clearly, he was having a hard time competing with the young ball players and he made up a lie just to impress them.

And what is even funnier, is he TOLD me what he said to them.

I wish my father had told me the tricks that men pull. But then again, I don’t think any father will. I think they should teach their daughters how to shoot a gun, how to box, and all the tricks that men play.

But….they keep their mouths shut for all eternity. And that, in my Nobody Humble Opinion, is why the world is filled with dumb blonds.

(Okay, so this was not a baseball story. It’s just one I remember. Funny how you remember all the times you were stupid, isn’t it? )

October 24, 2013 Posted by | baseball, Life, Uncategorized | , | Leave a comment

Nobody’s Perfect: Alex Rodriguez VS Chinese Students

Nobody’s Perfect

This week is all about cheating…

First up, the very popular multi-millionaire baseball Yankee, Alex Rodriguez. It seems he had to admit, just like Mark McGuire, Sammy Sosa, and Roger Clemens before him, that he was pumping up the juice, sticking the old needle in all the right places, all these years, and has been lying about it:Alex Rodriguez

Alex Rodriguez met head-on allegations that he tested positive for steroids six years ago, telling ESPN on Monday that he did take performance-enhancing drugs while playing for the Texas Rangers during a three-year period beginning in 2001.

“When I arrived in Texas in 2001, I felt an enormous amount of pressure. I felt like I had all the weight of the world on top of me and I needed to perform, and perform at a high level every day,” Rodriguez told ESPN’s Peter Gammons in an exclusive interview in Miami Beach, Fla.

“Back then, [baseball] was a different culture,” Rodriguez said. “It was very loose. I was young. I was stupid. I was naive. And I wanted to prove to everyone that I was worth being one of the greatest players of all time.

“I did take a banned substance. And for that, I am very sorry and deeply regretful.”

I’m not sure what they are going to do to him: Make him bat-boy for a year? Make him run beer errands for the Yankee fans during the home games? Make him play baseball in Cuba for a year? Go to steroid rehab?   Nobody Knows, but we are finding out now, that 103 more players tested positive for steroids in 2003…and that was…uh…TEN years ago? What were they waiting for? The Cubs to win the World Series?steriods

No, they (Who are they?) weren’t going to tell us.  Someone LEAKED this information! I bet, this person is, at this very moment, sitting with Snowden in a Russian Airport, because ‘President Obama is also VERY mad about this:

“And if you’re a fan of Major League Baseball, I think it tarnishes an entire era, to some degree,” Obama said. “And it’s unfortunate, because I think there were a lot of ballplayers who played it straight.”

This coming from a man who has never played anything straight in his life….he even cheated on his birth certificate…..but I digress.

And then, there’s the cheaters in China. It seems, the school exams in China are so HARD that the kids have been sneaking in electronic ‘cheating’ devices, so therefore, BRAS will be banned during the tests.

That ought to give those women an edge.China cheating

Education chiefs in northeast China have devised a new tactic to clamp down on cheating in the country’s annual university entrance exams: they have banned bras. About 9.12 million students will sit the notoriously difficult gaokao exam Friday and Saturday. Last year, according to the China Daily, more than 60,000 electronic devices were seized, including plastic earphones, wireless signal receivers, modified pens, watches, glasses and leather belts.

They should take a page from America: Our teachers let them bring anything at all with the answer to the test questions, because in America, the teachers don’t get their big bonuses unless the kids pass the tests.  In fact, if a kid is caught NOT using a calculator in math class….and they start actually doing math in his or her own head,—they will flunk the class for not knowing how to use the all important calculator.

The Chinese have it backward!

So, who wins the Nobody’s Perfect award for the week?

Obama…Obama’s daily cheating has tarnished an entire era for the whole planet…He should be kicked out of baseball.

July 29, 2013 Posted by | Barack Obama, baseball, China, corruption, Uncategorized | , , , , , | 2 Comments

Nobody’s Email: Mexico VS Canada Baseball Fight…

Nobody Gets Email

Ah….the joys of spring! We knew this was coming. The .globalization of baseball. Here we see that Mexico, who was leading by six runs in the 9th, did not think that this batter had any right to try to get on base. So the pitcher hit the batter— on purpose.

According to Tony La Russo, former coach of the St. Louis Cardinals, nothing makes a coach more furious than a pitcher aiming and hitting a player up by his head…for obvious reasons. A baseball to the head is very lethal. Sure, it hit his shoulder, but that’s close enough.

So, one cannot blame the batter…but why in the world do this when you have a good lead? We learn, that in Mexico the rules are different.

Some of those Mexicans look right out of drug gangs, but, I wouldn’t go up against any Canadian because they all play hockey, and while the Mexicans would have an advantage with guns, since no guns are allowed in Baseball, the Canadians would do the most damage.

That’s just my Nobody Opinion, which was not well thought out, but it sure makes sense to me. 🙂


March 15, 2013 Posted by | American Culture, baseball | , , , | 8 Comments

Nobody’s Perfect: Pope Benedict XVI VS The Miami Marlins

Nobody’s Perfect

What happening? Everybody is upset about that lovable but very old Pope Benedict XVI retiring. Frankly, being the Pope should be like any other job, and since he is the leader of his own nation-state, it’s only fitting that someone who’s brain isn’t functioning should NOT be in the drivers’ seat..really. Pope resigns

This notion that leaders of great institutions (take our Congress for instance) should stay in their jobs while dementia or strokes racks their brains, and all the top decision that come out of those brains must be adhered too—- is absurd.

Wait…Hillary just had a stroke…should she be allowed to run for President? Shouldn’t she retire for good?

Of course she should, but she won’t, because you see…Pope Benedict’s brain is still functioning–we’re not sure we can say that about Hillary.

Here’s what the Pope said:

In today’s world, subject to so many rapid changes and shaken by questions of deep relevance for the life of faith, in order to govern the bark of St. Peter and proclaim the gospel, both strength of mind and body are necessary, strength which in the last few months has deteriorated in me to the extent that I have had to recognize my incapacity to adequately fulfill the ministry entrusted to me.”

The Pope is not God, nor a Pharaoh…so what is the big deal?

This…is a daddy issue. People have been living without daddies for much too long. For instance, Chris Rock says Obama is our Daddy. All the Cardinals were on TV crying and saying he was like their Father.

Daddy Pope. (sigh)

So, who’s going to be the new pawn? A South American Pope? Since the news is talking about a black man from Africa, odds are…that’s just who the “elites’ want for the next decade since it seems the wars are going to Africa now and out of the Middle East, a black Pope would give them some clout with the black Muslims. Or a Spanish-speaking Pope to help with the upcoming amnesty?

Nobody Wonders.

Pope’s are not perfect: Really. How heavy is that silly hat? Poor guy..Frankly, I thought he has been out of his mind the second year of his popeful reign…when he started talking about aliens….

And then you have the Miami Marlins, whose fan base consists of four people standing in line to get tickets to the Miami Marlins Winter warm up FANFARE event. Evidently, they ate before they came to the park.  Marlins line

So, who wins the Nobody’s Perfect award for the week?

The Marlins win!  To have a baseball franchise, where 74 players are paid millions in salaries, (in a brand new tax-funded stadium) and they can only get four people interested in showing up to watch them play….I’d say the perfection card for the Miami Marlins is sitting somewhere in purgatory.

If the Pope can retire with dignity, maybe the Miami Marlins should too. I say we all say a good Catholic prayer for those poor workers at the concession stand. They are going to need divine intervention…maybe we should write the Pope and he can give them his blessing before he retires..

Marlines line 2Go ahead. You write him. I’m not a Catholic.



February 11, 2013 Posted by | baseball, Catholics, humor | , , , | 2 Comments

Bob Costas: Eulogy for the Common Conservative “Stan the Man”

Nobody’s Opinion

How do we judge our idols? At the funeral of Stan Musial on Saturday, held in the lovely Catholic ‘New’ Cathedral in downtown St. Louis…Bob Costas pretty much hit a home run. While I was crying at his words…and breaking up along with Bob when he got to the part (see video) about how Stan Musial said “Deal me in.” to the blacks in the clubhouse…it wasn’t until later that I remember Bob’s recent remarks about gun control during a football game not too long ago. (He wants to ban them)  Stan Musial church

You have to remember…Bob is a liberal…and yet, here was a liberal crying over the very things that conservatives pretty much take for granted. Decency. Integrity. Honesty. Stan Musial had all those traits..not only throughout his career, which stopped 50 years ago, but throughout his life. Anyone here in St. Louis, who ran into Stan a big smile, and at the least, an autograph.

Conservatives everywhere, take those tratis for granted. To us, those traits are as easy as breathing.  We didn’t think nothing of Stan being the way he was…after all…he was conservative. Went to church, stayed married to his high school sweetheart. Never put anyone down for their politics. He was a great ballplayer, sure…but there are millions that live their lives the same way Stan did.

I’m not sure Bob knows that.

An hour before the funeral, I saw an interview with Robert Redford.  Robert Redford was repeating the Obama’s mantra: People don’t want change, but it’s coming regardless of whether they like it or not. Period. He was talking about conservatives.

Here’s Obama’s words:

There are going to be some areas where that change is going to be very hard for Republicans. I suspect, for example, that already there are some Republicans who embrace the changing attitudes in the country as a whole around LGBT issues and same-sex marriage. But there’s a big chunk of their constituency that is going to be deeply opposed to that, and they’re going to have to figure out how they navigate what could end up being divisions in their own party. And that will play itself out oveStan and wifer years.Stan Musial honor

Yes…change is coming to the Stan Musials of the world whether they want it or not. (Nobody says: Be careful what you wish for…you just might get it.) Stan Musial at bat

Among the crowd at the funeral was all the town’s sports figures: Whitey Herzog, Tony La Russa, Commissioner Bud Selig, and Robert Pujols. It was a very long program because they showed the whole Catholic Mass on TV.

So— Here was two great ‘conservative’ American traditions: The Catholic Mass and American Baseball, and the theme of the day, was not only what a great ball player that Stan had been, but what a great human being. Bob spoke as if…nobody sees this kind of decency anymore.

Obviously not him.

To Bob…(by his speech) men like Stan are..rare. Morality, decency, living a humble life…that’s the  past.

Our country was founded on morality. On decency. On each man making his own mark, and then giving back. And those very important rules are based on religion. (That Obama smirks that we “cling”to.) That shows how much we have changed…Lance Armstrong, the steriods…you don’t have to look too far to see corruption in sports, or politics, or anything anymore for that matter.

And while Bob Costas eulogy will go down in history as being one of the best ever given about any man, Stan’s brother-in-law made an even more important reminder than the fact that Stan wasn’t prejudice. (As so many conservatives ALSO…are not.)  He reminded everyone, that Stan Musial worked with the Catholic Church AND the Pope, (Back when Reagan was President) to help funnel money over to Poland, which helped defeat the communists in Russia and Poland. When Obama presented him with the Congressional Metal of Freedom last year, he certainly didn’t mention what the man did.

I’m sure, Obama could have cared less.

The “change” that Robert Redford and Obama are talking about is why I found this funeral so sad. I think, the fact that Bob sees the abhorrent behavior that has become the norm in our sports was why he was crying, and maybe he was asking himself… Why can’t all men be as decent as Stan Musial?

Well, when they have leaders like Obama, and movie stars like Robert Redford…trashing the country and its traditions on a daily can expect a lot more tears.Stan Musial coffin

The real fact is: there are still millions of Stan Musials in America, living lives of ‘quiet desperation” helping their neighbors, loving their families, trying to be good citizens(buyinig McDonalds for the grandkids on Saturday)—and they are being attacked, while the sport figures, rap singers, horror fiction writers, movie stars…etc…are getting pats on the back for being basically rich drug addicts, adulterers, cheaters, and liars. The boys of summer are found on the ski slopes of Aspen, waiting for the next cocaine fix to come in.

Like Stan Musial, the common conservative man will never get on the news. And it’s that common, decent man who they want to not only ‘change” but crush.

Nobody could stop thinking about that through the whole funeral.

When the coffin was carried into the church, it had only a white linen drape. No flowers were on it. No roses of any sort. It was simple. Plain…like the man.

His grandson said “Gee, I had to follow Bob Costas.” with a sigh, but then said probably the most important thing: He looked into the camera and said he wanted everyone watching to try to be just like Stan.

If only.

Stan the Man, is the quintessence of the America that most of us grew up with. They drapped him in the American flag as they carried him out, as if to say to all the liberals: Here lies an American dream…watch and weep, and honor “Stan the Man.” He was the best of us.Stan Musial and statue

And should you ever get to St. Louis, go stand in front of Stan’s statue, and bring a harmonia, and play a tune. Stan would love it…he never went anywhere without his. And don’t forget to read what it says:

“Here stands baseball’s perfect warrior. Here stands baseball’s perfect knight.”

January 27, 2013 Posted by | American Culture, American History, baseball, conservatives, liberals, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments

Men…In Drag…In Baseball…In High School…and Dancing…

Nobody Gets Email

I have to say…these guys ALMOST did as good a job as the girls dancing! It’s the Senior VS the Staff…dance off, and it’s pretty funny. So…what is it about men wanting to get dressed up in girl’s clothes?

It seems to be a long-standing tradition, especially in Baseball, for the “hazing” ritual of baseball players to dress up in drag. Tony La Russa has a fine picture of the Cardinals World Series Champs of 2011, dressed up like women in his new book “One Last Strike.”

As a woman, I just can’t see the fun in this…but there you go. It’s Saturday night…Game Three of the World Series will be underway soon, and I am going to try to picture every one of the men on those teams in a pink tutu. Some of them would look pretty funny…I hope…the tradition continues!

Enjoy the video…and be thankful that in some parts of the United States, principles and coaches still have a sense of humor! (Thanks to Mona)

October 27, 2012 Posted by | American Culture, baseball, Uncategorized | , | 4 Comments

Tony La Russa, Girls, Life, and Baseball

Nobody Notes:

If you don’t like baseball, skip this…because it’s long and I just had to write it. If you do, I hope you find a few common themes in your life to compare, and decide to share it–Joyanna.

Nobody’s Reports

“I quit!” I told my mother. I don’t WANT to learn how to cook!” I couldn’t think of anything more boring than pouring batter in a pan and then putting icing on a cake.

It was the first time I had stood up to my mother. She had enrolled me in the “Brownies” and to become a full-fledged Girl Scout, you had to get the “badge” of cooking. I wanted to rip that little badge off of every Girl Scout that went around proudly displaying it on their ne Girl Scout uniform.  It was a shock to my poor mother, but to me, life was unfair. My father had started a little league baseball team in our small home town of Naples, Florida, and he had made my brother the star pitcher.

I resented him so much for being chosen for this incredible position in my parent’s eyes, that I would sit high up in a tree behind first base, and pout every game. And then it occurred to me, one night while I was sitting in that tree watching my brother perform brilliantly, making my father and mother so proud, that my older brother could get hit in the head with a pitch, and they would have to call an ambulance and all of us would wonder if my brother would live or die. I didn’t want him to DIE!  A knock-down and a few coughs would have made me feel a lot better.

The fact is, I just wanted more of my parent’s attention. It didn’t matter how many straight A report cards I brought home, I could never be the star my brother was.

Did I resent him? YES! Was I a sinner for even having the thought? Was there something inside of me that wanted him..less popular?

Come on…be honest. Even dogs get jealous of each other.

Later on in college I was the same rebel: “I will NOT declare a major! Why do I have to? I want to take EVERYTHING! It’s MY money! I quit.”

As much as I wanted to perform some magic thing to make my position as the measly girl in the family who was only suppose to grow up and cook, life was almost becoming unbearable. And I was only six.

I was learning that life was not fair. There was so such thing as “Girl’s little league teams” in the fifties. My father, who quietly sympathized with my plight, felt my anguish and let me warm up the catcher, Rocky. Yes, I would pitch endlessly to the ten- year-old Rocky before the games, who was even at ten, perfect for the position. I LOVED pitching balls to Rocky. My dad would always pat me on the back and say “Good job.”  I lived for that moment.

Rocky later on, grew up to take me to my first dance…and he had to fight the school board for the privilege because he was in Junior High and I was still in Sixth Grade.

Which brings me to my point: Girls…in their minds, from the earliest age know they cannot compete with the boys, and some of us want to.  Before those hormones of puberty push you into reading Vogue magazine, and trying on lipstick,  many girls WANT to run, catch, throw, tackle…and hit the home run.  To the Tomboys, like me, it was the first hard lesson in life: You grow up. Face the facts. But that doesn’t mean after puberty, that we don’t compete.

Oh yes we do.

Last night, I attended a book signing held at the Public Country Library here in St. Louis, where Tony La Russa talked for quite awhile about his life as a World Series winning coach for the Cardinals.

After he talked they took questions from the audience. One young blond jumped up, and with tears in her voice, expressed her undying devotion to the coach who had ruled her whole life. In fact, she had bought him a letter that she wrote when she was ten.  TEN! Wow.

I thought the courage of that young woman remarkable. To stand up in front of 800 people and declare how this one man had influenced her whole life—may not seem a hard thing to many, but that takes some guts.

His influence went way beyond baseball.

And then, another woman stood up, and expressed the thankfulness she had of all the family memories—and how she had stood up for the coach, in all the tough times. She was a fierce and loyal fan. I could just picture her verbally assaulting anyone who had dared attack Tony’s coaching moves.

Whoa. Do NOT give that woman a bat.

The emotion from both these women were written all over faces of the other Cardinal fans in the audience.

And that’s the beauty of baseball.  It’s an amazing thing this game…how it units whole towns. Whole cities…and when the World Series comes about…a whole nation.

I was asking myself, while I was sitting there…seeing people being turned into emotional little kids—Were they remembering  the days of Dad throwing them the ball, the trips to the ballpark with their parents? (The endearing father and son sitting next to me were.) What is it about the game that units people into actually becoming winners and losers right along with their home teams?

As people, we go around in tribes, that’s true…but in  baseball, it’s more than that.

It gives everyone watching, that all important need to all humans:  physiologically hope.

Back in the eighties I was coming out of an extremely painful divorce. I went on a “blind” date who took me to a Cardinal baseball game. It was that night, that I saw my first home run.

Most people see it when they are kids. I was fortunate enough to see my first major league home run when I was well into my twenties.  Like a lot of things, you have to see a home run  when your older to fuller appreciate the miracle of it.  It’s like—if you took your one-year old to Disneyworld…he’s not going to get it. (Trust me, I did that.)

Jack Clark hit that home run out into center field…and that ball sailed into the air, beyond eyesight, for the longest time. Easily…almost in slow motion. Who could DO such a thing? That came out of THAT man? Isn’t that impossible?

As I walked out of that stadium I was so ecstatic that my “blind date” knew he had made a mistake bringing me there in the first place. He never asked me out again, and I got hooked on baseball.

Five years later had to unhook myself. The passion it takes to watch every single game, takes a lot out of your psych if you’re an emotional person. I remember one season, where the Cardinals had just missed going to the World Serious, and after my father had died a long a painful death from brain cancer, I was more than ready when spring came. Baseball gave me hope…to start living again. Brushing off the cobwebs of winter, the constant struggle of making a living, paying bills, putting up with emotional pain sometimes unavoidable—Baseball would come and wipe the plate clean.

After all those guys on the field start with a clean plates too, and then…grinding by day..most of the time, striking out…but in the game of baseball…there were moments and IF you witnessed those moments then you felt that YES…in your life, you could have those moments too.

If you just keep plugging along, you too could win the World Series..just like the team…just like those guys…they never give up. YOU must not give up.

Baseball is almost a microcosm of the American Dream: Work hard, be honest. Play fair…you will be rewarded. Baseball could not have been invented in any other country. It is a moral game…and has the “rule of law” that everyone must play by…at least that’s how it was meant to be in its purest form.

I remember one particular moment in the Cardinal playoffs in, I think , 1985. (Some baseball historian might remember the game) It was an extremely cold night. I was in a short outfit, with no coat, had managed to get down on the lower deck…I was standing very close to the field, on the third base line, and some guy was standing next to me. We were watching a small man, pitch a no-hitter.

His name was John Tutor.

That whole stadium of 50,000 people were quiet. Mesmerized. As I watch pitch after pitch..those balls just floated to the plate.

Floated. Not fast…just floated. As if in slow motion or some kind of time warp. My eyes were surely deceiving me. Nobody could hit him. Nobody.

I was witnessing one of those rare moments that happen……….

Okay…You can see that that memory took me BACK to that moment—sorry. What I was trying to say is that after that long illness where I had to take care of my dying father, I needed a lift in life. And baseball gave it to me in spades.

Now, to Tony LaRussa:

Tony LaRussa, was amazing last night.  I myself have gone cold turkey on baseball, because I know how easily I can use it as an addiction for ignoring responsibilities that I need to attend to— so I didn’t watch many games in 2011. But one thing I did realized as I was sitting there:  There are genius’ in every field, and the moment Tony talked, it was clear to my mind that this man was clearly a one-of-a-kind baseball mind that was —genuis.

HIs memory alone…….good god…This man remembers every pitch, the day it was tossed, the scores…I can’t even remember what day it is sometime.

My husband calls me from work and I say “Uh..what day is this?”

But memory alone doesn’t put you at the top.

There are just a few men in history that stand out.  As a musician I can only explain it thus: Take the hundreds of musicians that have played Moonlight Sonata.

I’ve heard most of the greats, but no one could even compare to Arthur Rubenstein’s rendition. And he explained it this way: When he played anything, he put all his experiences into it: everything he had every felt, every thought he had ever had–into that moment when he played

And that’s what I believe made Tony La Russa’s coaching life above most others in history.

I think, he put everything he felt— every emotion, every thought about life—into those moments where he had to control the game.

I could be wrong, I haven’t read the book yet.

It’s just My Nobody Opinion, and from a “girl” no doubt. By the end of the night, Tony looked tired. He had done a book signing early in the day…signing over thousands of books could not be easy. All I could tell him when I finally got to my turn was, “You don’t have too much longer to go.”

I was trying to tell him in my own way, that I admired his stamina. But, I’m sure coming from a older women who still wore lipstick, it sounded stupid.

“Really?” he said. I don’t think he believed me.

I am sorry I missed my hometown Cardinal 2011 Championship season–  but I could tell by the faces on the people in the audience last night, that the Cardinals had lifted many a heart from the insanity going on in the country at this moment.

If we had Tony La Russa’s as Presidents, our country would come back from this seemingly hopeless state that we are in. Yes, Tony’s impeccable leadership shows us one thing: If you can come back in baseball…you can come back in anything.

And guess what? –Since I have learned that lesson well…I have decided to learn how to cook….after all these years.

In baseball, and life, anything is possible.

My father…would be proud.

I can almost hear him saying as I write these words, “Good job, honey, good job. Keep at it—someday you just might hit your first home run.”

September 29, 2012 Posted by | baseball, Uncategorized | , , | 2 Comments

Nobody’s Perfect: Ozzie Guillen VS Luis Moreno


Nobody’s Perfect:

 This week, the competition is between two wonders of the sports world: Ozzie Guillen, coach of the Miami Marlins, and Luis Moreno, a defender for the Deportive Pereira Soccer team. Nobody is having a harder time than me trying to decide which of these guys is worse.

First: When you get a great job, in the greatest country on the planet, the last thing you should do is insult the fans that help pay you your big paycheck. REALLY stupid.

The new Miami Marlins’ stadium was built downtown Miami, right in the middle of Little Havana. The stadium was built on many of the Hispanic  taxpayer’s backs, and Ozzie Moreno was hired for the obvious purpose of giving all those Cubans-Americans coming to the baseball games, a Spanish speaking manager to call their own: except–they have found out this week he is NOT one of their own.

It seems Ozzie is a big supporter of communism.

” The manager twice appeared on a radio show hosted by Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez in October 2005, when Guillen led the Chicago White Sox to the World Series title. At the time, Guillen said: “Not too many people like the president. I do.”In the Time magazine online story that ran Friday, Ozzie was quoted as saying, “I love Fidel Castro.” Later in the story he added, “I respect Fidel Castro. You know why? A lot of people have wanted to kill Fidel Castro for the last 60 years, but that (expletive) is still here.”

As you can imagine, that didn’t go over too well with the Hispanics in Miami, who hate Castro. To keep his job, Ozzie had to come out and apologized and say how “embarrassed” he was because he lives in Miami. He threw in an apology to the American people too, but like a true Obama supporter, he came out and said that he was “misinterpreted.”

As you can see, it might be some time before the Hispanic people forgive him. What he forgot to say was, “America has been very good to me, and I think Castro is a tyrant.” Now, he has to go out into the community and try to convert the Cubans into either liking him again, or make them all communists.

Good luck with that Ozzie.

Second: On the other hand, we have a soccer player named Luis Moreno, who booted a live owl in front of the whole world. The poor helpless thing wasn’t even in his way. It was a purposeful kick, and it died from that injury.

The bird — which had been stunned after being hit by the soccer ball moments before — was a mascot for the Atletico Junior squad. Fans of Atletico Junior have been calling Moreno a “murderer,” and the Panamanian player may face legal ramifications for kicking the bird.

But hey—Luis is at least more honest than Ozzie in his response to the public outrage.

“My family is very worried about what happened, and even more because there is an entire country against me — and I think that’s not fair,” said Moreno. “I believe that what happened is regrettable. I apologize to the entire country and I believe it is time to let the issue go.”

Nobody Thinks next time Luis is lying on the field injured, one of the opposing team should just go over and give him another good kick. If he happened to die from that kick…then the player that delivered that kick could rightfully say:

“I apologize to the entire country, and I believe it is time to let the issue go.”

Is killing an owl worst than saying you like Castro? Nobody Thinks you can’t compare— they’re both ….imperfect.   

So, this week Nobody Wins the  Nobody’s Perfect award of the week. Better luck next week.

April 10, 2012 Posted by | Angry Citizens, baseball, communism, Uncategorized | , , , , , , | 1 Comment

The Baseball Game of the Decade…

Nobody Flashes

 Nobody Knows

That I used to be a big Cardinal baseball fan. I was so bad and so hooked on baseball, that I had to look myself in the reality mirror one day and say, “Knock it off! ” —I went cold turkey. As some of you know, I did go to my first ballgame earlier this year with my friend Pattie, and the game was..boring. (the game was, not my time with my friend)  But tonight…I decided to watch the whole game of the World Series, because after all…St.Louis is where I live, and if there was one game to watch..this was it.

It had everything—-errors, fumbles, home runs…and heart-stopping moments of anticipation.

The Cardinals started off with 3 errors, dropping the balls, and then the Rangers made some really stupid mistakes. Both coaches ran out of pitchers. The game was tied in the 4th, and then the Rangers had two home runs right away, putting them on top 7-4, then 7-5.  

The Cardinals came back in the last strike of the game…to tie it in the 9th, and again in the 10th, and the game ended with a home-town boy hitting the home run in the bottom of the 11th, to center field.. to win.

Yes, the game was won, not by the big star,  Pujols, but by the rest of the team. It was baseball at it’s very best.  If you saw it, then you know. 

It was one of the best World Series games ever played. The team that you thought would lose, somehow managed to come up with everything and anything to stay in the game. The American dream, can still be found, in baseball.

Tomorrow 7th World Series Game should be no less exciting.

You know who I’ll be rooting for?

The Squirrel.

October 28, 2011 Posted by | American Culture, baseball, Uncategorized | , , | 1 Comment


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