Joyanna Adams

Nobody's Opinion

Nobody Remembers: The 11th Dimension

Nobody Remembers

I was searching through a UBS thingy yesterday, and found this little musing I wrote back in one of my blogs. It was written more than ten years ago…in 2005…on the subject of men and women.

And then I realized…these last 8 years with Obama, has hurt even my joy of writing, which I plan to try to get back to in 2017.

So, enjoy, and by all means, give me YOUR opinion on the sexes.

 

The 11th Dimension ii

There are two different stories in the news today that somehow in my twisted mind seemed connected.

One was Jose Coseco, who was talking about his gargantuan sexual activities while playing in the major leagues, thereby pissing off a whole league of men, who did not want the obvious to be obviously declared about their prolific and vast regalements of one night stands and mistresses. After all, American men have prided themselves on tight-lips, unless you’re trying to end a politician’s career.jose-conseco

The other didn’t get much play. It seems that all the physicists in the world had finally found the meaning of EVERYTHING. This puzzle was put together by a woman physicist. (darn!) She found out, by building upon the years of hard work of the men before her, that if you just go mathematically on up to the 11th dimension—Eureka! All the theories of the universe make sense. String Theory, Einstein’s theories, The Big Bang…it all comes together. And voila! There it was. Michio Kaku was so elated he was literally spinning on ice!

Which got me to thinking…if they can figure out how the universe works, why can’t our top physicists figure out how to make men and woman more compatible?

What is the quintessence of true love? Just where is the 11th dimension of Eros?

 Many of our finest minds have weighed in on the subject:woman-one

Jane Austen (1775-1817)…”One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.” (Mars and Venus predated by pudding and plums.)

Marcus Aurelius (121-180 AD)…“Sexual intercourse is merely internal attrition and the spasmodic secretion of mucus.” (spasmodic?)

Al Gore (still here, there, and everywhere)…“Love is never having to say you’re sorry.” (A lesson well learned by the U.S. Senate impeachment of President Bill Clinton)

And let’s not forget Shakespeare who had plenty to say on the subject:

Shakespeare (1564-1616): “Men are April when they woo, December when they wed; maids are May when they are maids, but the sky changes when they are wives.” (Men are April?)

AND, “Do you not know I am a woman? When I think, I must speak?” This mystery has bothered every man since Eve started talking about the apple.

Our great educational system has decided to force generation after generation of poor high school students to endure Romeo and Juliet’s answer to the question of young love denied by society…which is…just killing yourself. Thank God our kids are getting smarter and making it through the graduation ceremonies just pregnant instead of poisoned.

So, despite our best minds the mysteries and histories of the everyday interaction of the two sexes, no matter where they live, what nationality, what point in history, or what movie or book tries to solve the problem of the ultimate love affair, now in 2005, it’s obvious we have not come any further in our ponderings. The perfect love is as rare as winning the Powerball lottery. As rare as having your children turn out exactly how you wanted. In fact, most women are happy to find someone who comes home every night sober and mows the lawn once in a while, never mind perfection. Men are happy when permitted to play golf…and maybe get to see some skin when the hot flashes appear under the flannel pajamas. Perfection only happens on Oprah Winfrey, or on Mars.

And since no conclusions have evolved besides the obvious continued propagation of the species, I think, perhaps it’s time those physicists should have a crack at it. If they can mathematically prove something so esoteric as time and space, the quintessence of the ultimate love affair should prove easy, dimensionally speaking.

Jose was in the first dimension of love. Girls were a big smorgasbord to fulfill his steroidal appetite. All this took place while he was married…but here’s the kicker: when his second wife left him and took up with another ballplayer, he was so despondent he wanted to end his life. His despondency was not over any guilt or remorse of the countless hours of any despair he might have caused her, noooooit was over the fact that some other athlete had beat him out. He lost the world series of love to another rival, which is the worst thing in the world that can happen in the first dimension of love.

Hmmmm.. Jose is the quintessential example of the differences in the way men and woman look at love.

Is Testosterone the main reason for the way humans look at life as the scientists tell us?women-three

Can it be that simple?

OK…Testosterone is blamed for so many problems in society that it’s hard to list them all: WARS, porn, infidelity, gangs, Hugh Hefner, holes punched in doors, South Beach, road rage, child porn, big cars, bachelor parties, political parties, strip joints, bad fathering, bad breathe, bad jokes, dictators, communism, lack of tact, ridiculous laws, and all historical slavery…internet porn, the NBA, hockey fights, football jocks, 5-inch high heels…breasts implants, plastic surgery, Paris Hilton, steroid abuse, the Mafia, gambling casinos; probably the loss of the WMD’s and the abuses at Guantanamo bay. (Don’t tell me that girl didn’t have a strong dose of testosterone raging.)

THEN AGAIN, testosterone has built all the world tallest buildings, sewer systems, water reservoirs, sent us to the moon, built all the cars, and gas stations, built washing machines and computers, gave us electricity, jet bombers, and our very own digital 64” TV screens so that the hamburgers are half the size of a small Volvo. (This is really why we are all fat.) The food on TV makes any food portion in any restaurant look too small.

Seconds are a must.

Anyway, they pretty much built the whole world, technically speaking. Which could be why all religions think GOD is a male.

OBVIOUSLY, testosterone must be in every alien species in the universe because IF we were seeded or genetically produced in a space lab according to the Sumerian scholars … then the TESTOSTRONE filled aliens messed us up by not balancing out the hormonal DNA of the species and overdoing it a bit. But what did they care? They just wanted a bunch of slaves to build the pyramids.

I have a feeling that some female alien right now, somewhere on the other side of the galaxy, who might have at least seven hands, (which to the male species on her planet of course is not enough) is writing these exact same words at the very same time in another dimension lamenting alien love.

Every spring our young earthbound testosterone bucks wrestle and bond…and just have the best time in the world calling each other every degrading name ever used in the English language, while earthbound women are just standing on the sidelines, completely clueless…missing all the fun. Like willowy, flittering shadows, they stand in another dimension of time and space… staring at the men, peering at them through the foggy looking glass of total misunderstanding… And they just don’t get it.

They don’t get the ritual and love between men, bonding while telling fart jokes. Bonding while competing in football. Bonding while building a car. Most of all they don’t get why a man would prefer to dream on a picture rather than go in and dream with the girlfriend or wife who is lying in the next room.

But then again, men can’t fathom how a woman can think that babies that vomit, shit, burp, and are basically worthless, (until they can play videos games) can be so adored.

The cortex of the male love brain is floating in fantasies of a visual holy grail that makes him feel on top of the world. What a drug sex is! What a high!  Millions are made off of men in the 1st sexual dimensions. That’s one good reason for society to keep them there.

women-twoAliens love to pick up these guys…they will give up sperm even if the female alien is green and has four heads.

In fact, most men never come out of this stage.

And here’s what’s really funny. Some of your most brilliant minds, (including physicists) never get out of that first dimension. Most men, whether they were Gandhi or Einstein, never see pass that first love dimension, and more’s the pity.

While they are exploring the universe, solving nuclear secrets, building the latest weapon or engineering the most wonderful sewer system, it never dawns on them that right before their eyes, behind the obvious physical visions which push their evolutionary buttons, are other dimensions that need to perhaps be explored, something beyond the milk buds and the legs.

Some men gradually get to the 2nd or third love dimension, but not until the testosterone drops off, at around age 125. And the ones that have a mate usually have perfected the subtle and very necessary male talent of peripheral vision, which young men cannot seem to master, no matter how much they practice.

Women:  I know…I’ve heard all the phrases, VIVA La Difference! YING and YANG! Wow, look at those!  If they are tomboys they might make a leap of faith into the 3rd dimension while still young, but then puberty hits …they have too much estrogen… and there you are. They want to fall in love, make babies, shop, and talk. It’s inevitable…what they don’t want is PMS, even if it comes in handy for an excuse to be crabby, and go lay down, thereby not doing the rest of the housework.

They want to be worshipped, and have their lovers never look at another woman. Of course, pragmatically and physically speaking, this is a complete impossibility. But don’t tell that to women. They don’t believe it. They want to believe that when a man says “I love you, and you are beautiful.” they really mean it, and it is only them that the man has this opinion of. And the man may actually mean it…for that very moment that they are telling you. What they are not telling you is that earlier that day they said that very same thing to some girl down at the post office.confushed-baby

So the question is; Can the two sexes somehow transcend all hormones and met in the 11th dimension? Is there a man in the universe that actually wants to go higher, can actually see the possibilities of looking into the brain and thinking of his mate? Are there men looking for soul mates? Have we giving up on this idea?

Does testosterone stump high IQ’s? I was shocked to learn after much research that even geniuses were completely one sided when it came to the opposite sex. Thomas Edison would try to make the perfect woman by concocting in his in his mind: his wife, another mans’ wife, and another Daisy, for his nightly fantasies.  Richard Feynman, the great physicist had a proclivity for strippers. Most university professors are just absolute lushes….in fact…as I grew older it seemed that simple working men seemed to understand more the real wants of a woman. Maybe it was because they had to work harder to get what they wanted. Yep, the higher the man’s IQ, the bigger his ego. Sadly I found out there wasn’t much difference. And let’s face it; the first dimension is just too much damn fun, whatever your IQ.

Still, once in a while…it comes along…the glass is broken, a galaxies is born. There are couples that make it to the 9th dimension, and a few I am convinced—beyond.

History has reported some famous ones; Anthony and Cleopatra, Napoleon and Josephine, John and Abigail, Kermit and Miss Piggy.

But, not many.

The point here is that many of us do not marry above the 5th dimension. Because, well, the synchronicities that have to occur, to bring a love so perfect, that one can say they have truly found their soul mates….is very rare.

And what do men really want? A woman just like their mother…whom of course give the ultimate in love…unconditional. It’s reported men on battlefield will call out their mother’s name. And every woman knows when men are sick they become like little boys, wanting to be pampered with the littlest sneeze or ache. To compete in the hard realities of a man’s world …it is the one chance they get to take a leave and be pampered. And yes…it’s the least we can do.

According to most experts, a man wants support. A woman is there to make the great man with her unconditional support and love, praise for what he does, kudos’ for his bravery, his genius, keeping his children, his house, his meals, so that all he had to do was whatever he was striving to do…and oh what a great world man has built with he support of woman.

 But, is it any wonder that the feminist movement came along? That maybe, just maybe, guys, woman want the same?

If a man cannot conceive of the sheer boredom and repetition of years and years of doing housework, laundry, raising kids….is it any wonder there are so few woman geniuses? History has shown that a woman CAN compete when she has the time and support, with the best of them. She can be the best at Math with the highest IQ, (Marilyn vos Savant) a great scientist, (Marie Curie) or a great leader. (Margaret Thatcher, Elizabeth I, Goldie Mire,)

But to go to the ultimate double helix of a man and a woman entwined…drifting into space and time, up to a Nirvana of heavenly wisdom of true love, these women had to have had a man who supported her too. Most successful women had great dads.

A husband or lover should support the woman too. And not just monetarily, but support her dreams…does she want to build another Brooklyn Bridge? Does she think she found the answer to cancer? Can she design a new weapon? Can she design the perfect constitution for a new country?

Can you spare just some of your time to encourage her dreams? Can you actually see the vision she holds for herself? Can you take her in your arms, can you look her in the eyes, can you hit her with your best shot of unconditional love, past the first dimension?  Into the universe that she maybe is holding inside that you never dreamed existed? Can you give her that chance? Would the world be a better place?

Remember, it took a woman to put all those men’s theories into place. Vandalia is a genetic possibility for all humans.michio-kaku

Coming down from my maniacal delusions, I see there might be hope for Jose, and the discovery of the answer of everything in space and time gives us new hope for the future of our planet, if we can just get more knowledge.

So, I suggest these physicists need to get to work, and figure out this love mess—I have a feeling space and time is a piece of cake compared to figuring out how to balance human nature. And while they’re at it, maybe they can tell us out why men have nipples, why ducks are so cute when they quack, and how to get men out of the lst dimensions, and into a more productive place, or at least how to get them to put the toilet seat down.

As for mankind getting to the 11th dimension or Mars in a spaceship? Let’s not fool around with that one…let’s pray. Physicists can’t do everything.

 

December 29, 2016 Posted by | sex, Uncategorized | | Leave a comment

The Days of Wine and Tinder…..Laugh and Run Away….Like a Child At Play

Nobody Wonders

By now, if you, like me, thought Ashley Madison must have been one of Brad Pitt’s old girlfriends before last week, — now you know: It’s a pick-up online site for sex and it was hacked last week.Ashley Madison

Being a happily married women, I can’t even dream about having sex with another man, yet alone imagine going online to try to “pick” up men. Okay, sometimes I wake up and go ..DARN…especially when it comes to Dean Winchester getting ready to just say “hi” to me because in my dream he finds me attractive …and then I wake up.

ALWAYS…I wake up.

My husband is a wise man and says he doesn’t dream.

But, this afternoon, I was at a girlfriend’s house and she introduced me to the World Wide Web of online dating. Or online soliciting. Or more like..online sexual fantasy’s

“Hey, let’s look at YOUR IPAD, I don’t want sex ads showing up on MY computer!” I said. So, she showed me her favorite sites. And yes, she was on Ashley Madison.

My girlfriend is not a spring chicken, (she is 63) and she is ALSO married, but she doesn’t live with her husband. He supports her in her own house, and sometimes she goes to the Ozarks with him, but they haven’t had sex in years. THEREFORE, she doesn’t want him to know she’s “hooking” up with men that she finds online, for the obvious reason he would stop feeding her.Askley Madison two

Okay, who am I to judge I told myself.  She needs to eat.

She mostly posts on Craig’s list. After reading some of the ads on Craig’s list, I had to laugh. The woman always said they were basically HEAVEY, and if men couldn’t handle fat, don’t bother. And the men were either promising nights of sexual bliss or they just “wanted to talk.” Lies, are common she said. Almost everyone lies.

Okay. Got it.

These ads were more than Shades of Gray, more like pallets of Popcorn Porter Paints. Really funny stuff.

Anyway, she told me about the last guy she met.

“It’s always a bad thing when they don’t send their picture.” she says. “Do YOU post YOUR pictures?” I asked.

“No.” She said. The double standard this woman had was killing me.

And so, when the online guy showed up at her house, she immediately understood WHY he never posted a pictures. She didn’t want to have sex with him. I think it because he was fat. (Not that she is skinny) And THEN she admitted she was texting and trying to hook up with other guys RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIS EYES, while he was there!tinder

“Oh, that’s pretty bad” I said.

“I know” she said, as she smiled and giggled like a little girl.  And that’s when I realized she was addicted to the fantasy. She really wants a rich man to fall deeply in love with her…and yet, what does SHE have to offer?

Cookies! That’s right guys. The best thing about her is she bakes pretty good chocolate chip cookies…I kid you not. That’s her plan. Get the guy addicted to her cookies and they will come back.

She wants to write a book, and wanted my opinion on the matter, so I went home and decided to dig a bit into the SEX online texting and dating scene, and found out—it was worse than I thought.

Men and women of today are totally *$&% up.  On an evolutionary scale of 1-10, we will not outlast the common garden worm.

There are at least twenty “hook” up sites, (Like Tinder) where you can just flash through the pictures, text that person, and it’s understood you are going to have sex as soon as possible. Is it any wonder Planned Parenthood is salivating over baby livers?

It’s the newest thrill. Evidently Wall Street guys love it. The women, not so much. And bars all over America are suffering business because the cell phone is the new pick up place.

The more I read, the sadder I felt.

THIS IS IT? This is what it’s come to?

When I got home, I was just lying around thinking of how my own parents met…and my mom of course, loved telling me the same story every so often.admiral

Her and her girlfriend went one night…it was during the beginning of WWII, the men were going to be going off to war, and everyone was young, and full of life. The girls decided to go dancing on the SS Admiral. It was one of the last of the big Mississippi Riverboats, and the dance floor alone could hold over a 1,000 people. The boat would leave the dock in St. Louis, and go up the river, and all the sailors were there that night.

My dad and his buddy, ask to sit down next to my mom and her girlfriend, and bought them a drink.  And then, my dad asked this little bit of a girl (she weighted about 90 pounds) to dance, and on their VERY first dance, they cleared the floor. They were so great, that just like in the old movies, everybody stopped dancing, formed a circle around them, and applauded to the delight of seeing such wonderful dancers.

They never stopped dancing: in fact their two KIDS had to take lessons and dance. My brother and I even became professional at one time.admiral dance floor

They were…just meant to be together through thick and thin…they could always dance.

Such a romantic story.

When the sixties came along, and “free” sex, and the “sexual” revolution, ruined it all.

Sure, men and women still fall in love. They still get married, but now, there are more single women than married couples in the United States.

Explaining the reason for the loss of romance and relationships that last a lifetime would take a book, but..watching this 63 year old women, telling me about how addicted she was to meeting men online, and how empty it all made her feel because none of these men even bought her dinner first, I couldn’t explain to her, that men haven’t changed.  If you act like a slut, then you will be treated as such.  But…she was just so lonely, and so there’s the problem.

Tonight–this was on Drudge…someone analyzed how many woman on Ashley Madison were even USING the site..even though it is free for woman, (but not for men)

Overall, the picture is grim indeed. Out of 5.5 million female accounts, roughly zero percent had ever shown any kind of activity at all, after the day they were created.

The men’s accounts tell a story of lively engagement with the site, with over 20 million men hopefully looking at their inboxes, and over 10 million of them initiating chats. The women’s accounts show so little activity that they might as well not be there.

So, the women were getting on it to see if their husband was there, basically.Tinder three

The Admiral is gone now. There are no more riverboats running anymore on the docks underneath the Arch….like Ferguson, downtown is dead.

The men and women who saved the world, are gone too. Their children are not dancing anymore, they are…hopelessly detached from the real things that make life worthwhile, lasting love, going through life…together. They go to bed with their cell phones.

Someday, the computer and robot women will replace the real thing we are told.

Someday, robot women will be going online to find robot men…and Nobody Wonders..

Has that day already arrived?

 

 

 

August 27, 2015 Posted by | sex, Uncategorized | | 2 Comments

Record All Your Sex on IPHONE? GREAT Idea!

Nobody Flashes

You knew this day was coming: Apple now has an app so that you can record ALL your sexual activity…you can then send it to your best buddy and start comparing..but Nobody would like to remind you…that this could also be used against you, and not just because you wife might happen upon it…

Think of the lawsuits people. Wow! So and so will be able to prove they had unprotected sex, or got that venereal disease, or now show the girlfriend/wife that you are not just making things up.Iphone sex

Apple’s iPhone will now let people track exactly how often, when and how they have sex.

As part of new “reproductive health” tracking features, Apple has added an option for “Sexual Activity”. When users click on it, they can enter information on whether protection was used as well as the date and time.

Ha ha ha ha! Reproductive health. Just THINK what they could do with Bill Clinton’s app.

On another fine note: Did you know that BOTH Russia and China have protected their electrical grids from an EMP attack?

We….have not. If we get hit, China and Russia will be laughing and drinking their last bottles of California Wine.

Last time Congress voted on getting our protected, it went down to one vote…and didn’t pass.

A few frustrated men are trying to get this done, but they fear time is running out.

So what you say?

One EMP attack could kill more than half of the people in the United States. We would have no electric for years…unless of course, the few states that have already protected themselves let us all come live there.

What good would the Apple Sex App be then?

AND…you wonder….Will the NSA be able to get your sexual activity records?

Does the wolf still howl at the unprotected full moon?EMP attack one

June 9, 2015 Posted by | absurd | , , | 2 Comments

Nobody’s Perfect: Bill Clinton VS Prince Andrew

 Nobody’s Perfect

What do Bill Clinton and Prince Andrew have in common besides the love of fresh young babes?Bill Clinton and babes

Fresh older babes!

(just kidding)

Why–the same pimp! And this week, Prince Andrew joined the ROYAL sex in the Caribbean mountain resort high club, a club that Bill Clinton has been known to enjoy for many years.

Not every great ruler can be moral and in love with their wife, and set fine examples for their countries, and Bill Clinton certainly has led the way as having a big appetite for women.

Powerful men will be powerful men, especially when they have a buddy who supplies them with young, underage sex that they can enjoy privately far away from wives and the press. And especially if they lack personal character.

Yes, this week it’s Bill Clinton VS Prince Andrew:Andrew and Epstien

Who’s the bigger horn dog?

We have come to learn, that they both are good friends with the same billionaire, and not just any billionaire, Jeffery Epstein.

Epstein, 61, has maintained many of these relationships (with the rich and famous) even after pleading guilty in 2008 to a felony charge stemming from a lengthy probe of his lewd interaction with scores of underage girls, many of whom were recruited while they were students at a Palm Beach high school. 

Bill Clinton identified in lawsuit against his former friend and pedophile Jeffrey Epstein who had ‘regular’ orgies at his Caribbean compound that the former president visited multiple times

Yes, Jeffery had a perfect set-up, and no doubt ran the biggest whore house South of the border.

More….

But while Prince Andrew and other public figures resumed meeting with a post-prisothomas roberts 26.JPGn Epstein, Clinton appears to have avoided the billionaire, who owns a private Caribbean island, a Manhattan mansion, a New Mexico ranch, and a Paris apartment in addition to his waterfront Palm Beach residence.

According to court records, Clinton “frequently flew” with Epstein aboard the investor’s private jet from 2002 to 2005, the year news of the police investigation of Epstein was first reported.

And now, a former SEX slave is writing a book all about it…how she was forced to have sex with Prince Andrew, who she says was abusive.

The fifth in line to the throne slept with Miss Roberts at an orgy with other under-age girls on Epstein’s private Caribbean island, as well as in a private house in London and in Epstein’s New York mansion, according to the court papers. 

She plans to spill the beans on the little whorehouse in the Caribbean, and the Queen, is denying it all—-as is Andrew. To save his ‘reputation” he took his former wife, that wild and crazy swinger Fergie, to the Royal’s personal hangout in the Swiss Alps, to where she came out saying this about her x:

‘He is the greatest man there is. It was the finest moment of my life in 1986 when I married him. He is a great man, the best man in the world.’ 

I’m SURE the fact that he paid off all her old debt had nothing in the world to do with it. He might just have to marry her again.

So, two of the most powerful men in the world have been flying down to the Caribbean to engage in wild sex orgies with underage women.

Whose going to suffer the most from the sex scandals?Clinton cartoon

Bill or Andrew?

Well—-Jeffery had 21 different telephone numbers for Bill Clinton in his address book, but everybody in the world knows he’s a horn dog, and most people just accept it.

Andrew on the other hand, has stayed out of the scandals. One good note for him, at least he didn’t get his nude pecker splashed all over the tabloids.Nude Harry

So, who wins?

Hillary Clinton…she will get the women’s pity vote in 2016 if she plays this just right. And if she becomes President–because the elites convince the world that powerful men NEED to have a lot of sex, get over it…the Drudge Report will be history.

Next: We need to see the nude Bill and Andrew pictures. Right?

Right. Now THAT’s women’s equality. Someone ring Gloria.

Or. on the other hand…that might be considered…torture.

 

 

 

January 5, 2015 Posted by | Clintons, sex, Uncategorized | , , | 3 Comments

Did She Know, or Didn’t She?

Nobody Flashes

DEAR READERS!—WordPress is having a free trial on some of their more expensive themes…so I’m going to try maybe this one and maybe one other. Please tell me if you like a more formal format, or something like this, which is…sort of different…

Having said that…

I had a friend all upset about this article—-gardner

From The Daily: Elizabeth Garner, 42, who cheered for the Tennessee Titans for three seasons  until 2008, also reportedly agreed to drug screenings and to attend two  Alcoholics Anonymous meetings a week when she was sentenced in October. Garner,  who is married, allegedly tried to perform oral sex on the boy in a bathroom  during a party at his parents’ home.

Ms Garner said she was so drunk at this party that she thought the 12-year old boy was some other guy.

HA! What’s really funny is my dear friend (I cannot mention his name) actually thought that it was possible that you could get drunk enough that you wouldn’t remember having oral sex with a really young kid.  Nobody Thinks what more than likely happened is that Elizabeth was either dared, or paid, or something, to do the act by probably other men at the party.  And yes, she probably was really drunk, but you’d have to be passed out not to notice the ‘guy’ was maybe a bit too….young.

But I really don’t think that’s what was upsetting the guy…he joked that he was getting beat on the hand by ugly nuns at 12…darn! Nevertheless, he is concerned about the consumption of alcohol and what it does to young women.

I love guys. And so, that’s why I posted this very fun picture.

What do YOU think? Did she really not know?

November 29, 2013 Posted by | sex, Uncategorized | | 4 Comments

Rated XXX…with a HUH?

Nobody Flashes

I like to keep the blog….with some modesty of content…because I am NOT fond of porn. I always wondered about porn of any kind, because to me, why would anyone prefer it to the real thing?

Stupid I know. I know, but due to the wiring of my female brain, I can’t help myself.

Nevertheless, yesterday I watched a video on some lady professor who was teaching a class on sex toys. Really…like college kids need to know about sex toys. Then I watched a video of two black men who were telling everyone some college professor was having couples fornicate in class. As IF there was any college student that has not had sex in 2013.

Right.

Clearly the universities are promoting sex, which is to promote Planned Parenthood, who makes most of its money off—say it all together class—abortions!

The more abortions, the more money Planned Parenthood can give to the democrats!

I always follow the money.

And then…while searching around the net, I found some other VERY interesting pictures.

You see here…a penis bush trimmed in Canada. A baby shower vagina cake…..and a symbol of protest to the current ruler in Yugoslavia.

Clearly, the universities are actually making a big difference! Forgive me (or NOT)  for portraying…some disturbing pictures, but then again, we must consider what is happening to ‘art.”

penis bush

Vagina cake

Vagina cake

purple fingerconfused face

October 22, 2013 Posted by | Art, humor, sex, Uncategorized | , , | 3 Comments

Nobody’s Perfect: Obamacare VS Free Vibrators

Nobody’s Perfect:

This week, we have real contest going—Obamacare VS Free Vibrators. Which would YOU rather have?

The contest is between two entrepreneurs: Barack Obama and Tom Nordone, so let’s get started. Obamacare failure

Obamacare:

Obama had three years to get his website for Obamacare up and running, but on the day of its debut last week, not only was the government shut down, it seems the whole computer Obamacare program, was just…not working. Obama knew that was going to happen because he said this WEEKS before:

“I guarantee you, the opponents of the law, they’ll have their cameras ready to document anything that doesn’t go completely right, and they’ll send it to the news folks and they’ll say, ‘Look at this, this thing is not working,'” Obama said Thursday.

Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha! For once, Obama was right! It was all over the news. Not only was it not working, more people attended the presentation on “Orchestrating Orgasms” at the University of New Hampshire (Over 500 people showed up.) than actually got through on the Obamacare website. And that’s including all of Obama’s 57 states!

There are going to be some glitches as this thing unfolds,” Obama said. “Somewhere around the country, there’s going to be a computer glitch and the website’s not working quite the way it’s supposed to, or something happens where there’s some error made somewhere.”

Free Vibrators!

And then there’s Tom Nardone…Free vibrators

Tom  decided to get in on the action, and from the goodness of his own heart, decided to give away free vibratos to Detroit!

 Tom Nardone of Birmingham, the founder of the Detroit Mower Gang, a prolific pumpkin carver, bulletproof vest manufacturer, a married father of three and the creator of a successful Troy-based sex toy business named PriveCo, has harnessed the federal government shutdown to bolster name recognition for his company’s website, vibrators.com. For as long as the government is closed, his company is offering 200 free vibrators per day to furloughed government employees. “Are you a federal employee that has been deemed non-essential?” the Vibrators.com website asks. “Do you have a little too much time on your hands and nothing to do? Is the recent government shutdown to blame?

As of about 9:15 p.m. Friday, Nadone posted on his Facebook page that 40 orders had been filled.Tom Nardone

That’s 30 more people than who actually signed up for Obamacare on the first day.

So who wins the Nobody’s Perfect Award of the week?

Obama of course. By not having the websites ready for primetime, he missed all those unemployed workers out there in America, who were attending classes on sex and using their free vibrators. Most of them hung up after the first three minutes.

Nobody Thinks that Obamacare will still be having problems in 2031, while Mr. Nordone will no likely become more popular than Obama….and on his way to buying the whole city of Detroit.

Yes…the lesson here is capitalism beats socialism every single time.

Congratulations “President Obama”!

You’ve made a big fool of yourself…once again! And the world is watching. Obama scary

October 7, 2013 Posted by | humor, Obamacare, sex, Uncategorized | , , , | 2 Comments

Shades of Gray Makes Anal Sex Popular: Oh…Great.

Nobody Wonders

As I watched my local TV morning news…there was a female doctor talking to the local reporter about a most interesting habit happening in St. Louis wih teenagers: anal sex is real popular.

It seems there was a book that was VERY popular last year, a trilogy called “Fifty Shades of Gray” which has lots of sex, and there must be some anal sex in it.Fifty Shades of Gray

I haven’t read it. BUT…this doctor was stating that because of this book, teenage high school girls were having a lot of anal sex (instead of the normal heterosexual sex) so as to ‘save’ themselves and that she wanted to tell these girls that they could catch all the dreaded venereal disease this way, even with a condom. She said that not only that, but there was a problem with tearing of the anus, and then you have infection problems…and it’s painful…etc. You know, real facts.

And not exactly what I wanted to hear with my morning breakfast.

So while I was listening to this, you have to admit that physically speaking the anus was not built to handle the male penis. It closes up. It’s physical purpose is for elimination. And yet, this sex book is selling the idea to young kids all over the country and who the heck knows why, unless it’s to give all woman the idea that anal sex is just as normal as the usual God intended way, and therefore they will all think homosexual sex is normal because, HEY…they do it too!

And now…Nobody Wonders, how much more stupid can we all get?

Answer Is: Just watch. I’m waiting for the next thriller about fornication with dogs.

I can’t help but remember…the Divinci Code,  And —when is Tom Hanks going to make the movie

Shades of Gray?

Nobody Wonders.

 

May 1, 2013 Posted by | sex, social engineering | , , | 1 Comment

Nobody Knows: Syria, Underage Sex, Gays, More Sex, Hurricane Sandy

Nobody Knows

Obama’s Red Line

Nobody Knows exactly why Obama came out today to talk about why he is hesitating on rushing into Syria— although he drew a line in the sand when Syria used chemical weapons, the tough guy now claims they don’t know who the chemical weapons belonged to, so he’s not going to jump to conclusions like he did when that white cop tried to arrest his black professor friend.

No…he didn’t say that. He just talked forever and like a good politician, said nothing. kris 35

 President Obama said during a press conference Tuesday that the use of chemical weapons in Syria could be a “game changer” in the U.S. response to the conflict, but he made clear his administration first needs more evidence. the rebels have specifically requested ­antitank weapons and surface-to-air missiles. weapons are falling into the hands of al-Qaeda-linked Islamist militants fighting alongside Syrian opposition forces.

Nobody Knows if he is going to give the Syrian rebels, who are Al-Quada, all the weapons they want, because according to many sources he is already doing it. That’s what Benghazi was about according to many reports.  Obama was using Benghazi to transfer weapons to the rebels in Syria Via Turkey.

This way, when we see American weapons in the hands of Al Qaeda he can just say they got those weapons after Benghazi…giving himself protection.

Obama isn’t going up against Putin: He’s not that smart.

The Morning After Pill

Your Obama government wants to let 15- year-olds have sex: It’s okay. “We got your back!”

Today, Plan B One-Step is sold behind pharmacy counters, and buyers must prove they’re 17 or older to buy it without a prescription. Tuesday’s decision by the Food and Drug Administration lowers the age limit and will allow the pill to sit on drugstore shelves next to spermicides or other women’s health products and condoms — but anyone who wants to buy it must prove their age at the cash register.

So…you see, if you’re 15, you can buy the pill and hand it over to your 12 year old sister.  NY Federal Judge Overrules FDA Over-The-Counter Ban On Emergency Contraception Pill

Makes sense to me.

And speaking of “this doesn’t make sense”

Feminists Gets Attention:

Nobody Knows just how bored young women are these days:black cross

PITTSBURGH (KDKA) – Students at Carnegie Mellon say it’s freedom of expression, but the Catholic Diocese of Pittsburgh calls it inappropriate and disrespectful. At an annual art school parade, a female student dressed up as the pope, and was naked from the waist down while she passed out condoms.

Even more, witnesses say the woman had shaved her pubic hair in the shape of a cross.

I would like to know how many witnesses saw this cross, wouldn’t you? I bet Nobody Knows but Nobody Wonders how many of them had a religious experience upon the mere sight?

Gays in Sports

Obama got so excited about a black gay basketball player saying he was gay..that he called him on the phone and immediately the press took the hint and proclaimed that all gays should come out of the closet because jocks are, let’s face it: Not fond of gays.Robert Griffin

And one jock got a lot of flak for speaking his mind;.

Washington Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III on Tuesday complained about the “tyranny of political correctness” currently holding Americans “hostage.” His comments, posted on his official Twitter account, come as some people are demanding the Redskins change their team name because of its “racist” meaning.

“In a land of freedom we are held hostage by the tyranny of political correctness,” Griffin tweeted.

So far, there are no reports that Obama has called Griffin and praised him on his courage.

I would. Hand me the phone.

Remember Hurricane Sandy?

The Hurricane that pushed a lame-duck President back into office because the Republican New Jersey Governor, (Chris Christie)  got Obama to help him push a $60 billion dollars check over to his state, has not been forgotten by the poor people that suffered from it.Chris Christie & Obama two

Youttube wouldn’t let me transfer the video..but here is Chris moaning about how hard it is to get all that money to the people that need it.Chris Christie

It’s just SO hard to manage that kind of money. (Really. Give it to me, I’ll hand it out.)

Nevertheless, it’s been six months and the poor people up in New York and Jersey are still living without electric, and houses, and almost 200 families are about to be homeless again.

“I think the next six months will be a whole lot better than the previous six, and that’s because we learned from the mistakes of Katrina in how to put this thing together,” Schumer said.

Really? If they learned from Katrina, why didn’t they use what they learned in the first six months?

I would laugh and say, “You gotta love a politician!” but…I can’t. Sorry.

Nobody Knows where all that money will end up, but you can bet, it will not go to the victims of Hurricane Sandy.

May 1, 2013 Posted by | Barack Obama, Benghazi, communism, Uncategorized | , , , , , | 1 Comment

And the Virgin Vote For Sex Oscar Goes To…..Australia!

Nobody Knows

I have avoided posting this ad for Obama, because it’s just so embarrasing…I couldn’t help but wonder if women really are so stupid now, that they think that IF they vote for Obama, they might have sex with him. They left loves this bimbo, she is so creative! So original! So cool!

THEN it was reported that Lena Dunham was not so original (They claim she thought this little “lose your virginity”) concept all by herself.

Then it came out that Putin used it FIRST.

BUT—-Let’s get the record straight: It was Sarah Hansen-Young, Green Party women from Australia that had them BOTH beat! And notice, she actually looks like she would be good at phone sex..unlike Lena, who you can’t picture doing anything but buying really ugly jewery and getting a tatoo on her butt saying she voted for Obama. I’m not sure she’s READY for sex.

What’s the message? SLUTS VOTE!

Good god. This is solid proof that all liberals and communists think all women are good for is sex. They HAVE no brains.

Now we know. Lena copied Putin who copied Sarah Hanson Young…Australia. The Brits are FIRST again!

(Thanks to amfortas)

October 30, 2012 Posted by | Elections, humor, Obama, sex, Uncategorized | , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Men…Watch the Curves

Nobody Wonders

Let’s talk about “breeding.”

Did you men know WHY you really prefer curves in women? Well…it’s because if a woman has big hips, big bust and a small waist, she is carrying more DHA (docosahexaenoic acid) which is omega 3 fat, which means she will produce smarter babies.

HA! And you thought that it was something else causing all that excitement!

Really. Get it together. Babies, according to the latest research, need lots of DHA to feed their rapidly growing brains, and only women with hips and curse have LOTs of that stuff stored up.

Getting a bust enlargement at your local plastic surgeon office DOESN’T COUNT! Don’t be fooled guys into thinking that woman is going to give you great kids…just great sex. You DO want smart kids —don’t you? Uh..uh…

Oh…and shocker…curvier women are smarter themselves! Who knew? You have to be pretty smart to play the dumb blond. I should know. Outside of this enlightening blog, where I discuss the most interesting insights on the political scene…I’m actually, the dumb blond who can’t find her car keys, and has NO clue how to do…anything that requires hard labor. I produced a VERY smart baby. Very high IQ. Genuis level in fact. My son has no clue just how much DHA I contributed to his brain, and some day…I’ll be sure to drop the dumb blond act and tell him.

It’s also why Richard Feynman hung out with strippers…they were very smart, he said.

It’s true…look it up in his books.  

Now…I’m not sure I believe this: BUT if you go by this ‘discovery’ that the higher the Omega 3 fat content in a woman’s body, the smarter her children, then Japan would be leading the world in just about everything because Japanese women have more DHA than American women.

But, it’s not just all those curves: Men may not know it, but they are really attracted to small waists. (Wait…I know…I know..you thought I was going to say feet.)

If a woman has a small waist, she is less likely to have been pregnant before. If the woman has a bigger waist– their babies grow TOO big. Not good.

American women, due to the fact that the cows are eating corn and not grass, are pretty low on this DHA stuff. The omega 3 vitamins are being processed out of our diet, and since the fashion industry is run by “gay” designers who prefer women to look like young boys–the young girls want to be so thin, they starve themselves out of the necessary DHA they are going to need to make smart babies.Okay…so there’s another reason for all those thin models. Curvier women are more exspensive to ‘dress’…all those ‘darts’.

Which is why Nobody is glad to see all those healthy young women bodies at the Olympics…although, I’m having trouble finding the waists…or hips! Or even busts….I’m not sure about that. One thing for sure, their kids will never have to put up with the local school bully.

Remember ladies…tiny waists to men, might be just as exciting as that expensive boob job you’ve been thinking about.

Do a lot of yoga bends,…he’ll never know WHY in the world he is crazy about you, but he will be glad once you give him the next Olympian or Nobel Prize winner.  

(Nobody Would Make This Stuff up)

August 1, 2012 Posted by | American Culture, fashion, humor, science, Uncategorized | , , , , | Leave a comment

The Next Olympic Sport: SEX

Nobody Remembers

The Olympics, we have found out, is not only a competition for sports, it also a big gigantic international orgy..

Who knew?

I’m still remembering Rocky Balboa saying he was “saving his strength.”

Okay, is that a myth? Do you get better results in your sport if you have more sex?  Does the balance beam seem a bit less…intimidating after you’ve had sex with the Australian swim team?

Enquiring minds want to know:

In a sign of what the world’s fittest sportsmen and women get up to in the Olympic village, a record 150,000 free condoms – 15 for each competitor – have been made available to them. Women’s football goalkeeper Hope Solo told the Daily Mirror: ‘There’s a lot of sex going on at the Olympics. I’ve seen people having sex out in the open, getting down and dirty on grass between buildings.'”


Okay…so…the LAST thing the officials of the world want is a bunch of international babies or sport agents finding out their main ticket to paradise went and got pregnant at the Olympics, and cannot pose for that awesome bikini picture on the cover of Wheaties.  

While everyone can imagine the hormone drives going on with the top athletes  of the world, and all those magnificent bodies floating around…this Nobody Remembers..

That once upon a time, if you needed a condom..you paid for your own.! In fact, you kept your sex life a secret.

What? What kind of message does this send to the millions of teenagers in the world looking to compete in sports? If you get to the top of your sport then you will one day end up in the biggest orgy in the world? GO FOR IT!

Nobody also wants to know…Who exactly is paying for these condoms? Is Durex donating them  in order to get a bit of “free’ advertizing? Or do the taxpayers of London pay for them? Or are they included with the price of your ticket?

This has thrown a whole new monkey wrench into my Olympic viewing.  I’m going to be matching up the Japanese male gymnasts with the American women swimmers and volleyball team, and picturing all kinds of Olympic sex stunts.

Will they be able to put on that condom flipping from the high bar into the pool?

Will the pole vaulter be able to put that condom on, BEFORE he lands on the discus thrower?

And last but certainly not least: WILL there an Olympic competition to see who can use the most condoms in a day? Will the American win that?  I’ll bet on it.

Will SEX someday be a REAL Olympic sport?

Somebody stop me….

July 20, 2012 Posted by | humor, Sports | , , | 4 Comments

Sex Scandals: Where’s Obama’s “Bimbo?”

Nobody Wins

Hillary:They promised me…Susan: He’ll NEVER divorce her… Obama:I’d like a vowel please…

Everyone was just shocked..shocked, this week, that whoever leaked the sex scandal on Herman Cain has not succeeded in knocking him out of first place in the Republican run for the White House.

Well, what do they expect?

Bill Clinton has spent millions trying to clean up his playboy image from the White House afternoon cigar and pizza-with-a-thong romps. And lets not forget, Bill’s relentless rewriting of his own history has changed the national feelings on that sexual stuff. We all know that he is married to Hillary but they are in no way, nor ever will be again, husband and wife. They keep the image up, because they would lose all their power if they did not.

Don’t you find it funny that Hillary and Bill are never discussed anywhere as a couple anymore?  

We are still being reminded monthly by the Democrats that Bill Clinton’s sex scandal was unfortunate, but it didn’t keep him from, “being a great President and giving us a great economy.”

Sooooooooooooooooo….

The whole Bill Clinton impeachment ordeal cost the whole country so much in money and embarrassments, that now, in 2012, the American people are absolutely sick of political parties digging up old sex scandals to win the game. We’re FED UP with it.

The Democrats did such a good job protecting the sex scandals of Bill Clinton, Ted Kennedy, Jack Kennedy,  and Martin Luther King, with, “They can still run the country.” propaganda, that the American people are not about to condemn Herman Cain for maybe asking a girl back to his office late at night…twenty years ago.

Really, there should be a statue of limitations on sexual “misconduct.”

Right now, NOBODY wants to vote for Romney, so they’re sticking by the side of McCain, old sex scandals or not.  

Since it’s fair game for reporters to bring up past affairs, or no affairs, or affairs that are in the imagination of the other political party, I think it’s high time we expose Obama’s affairs. So, I’m going to speculate about Obama’s sex life just like all the other reporters on the planet, because it’s not about the truth it it? It’s mostly about hurting the rich and powerful. (I’m not a reporter.)

NOBODY FLASHES

Barack Obama and Susan Rice

Obama is in a hot, sticky, clutch of hot, sticky (there’s those words again)  hormonal infidelity, with no other than his ambassador to the United Nations, Susan Rice.

What do you have to support this malicious allegation Ms Joyanna?

Well, a lot more than they have on Herman Cain, I have my impeccable woman’s intuition!

Besides the fact that when he first got into office she was always around him..sometimes looking like she just got out of a hot shower. I’d know that look anywhere. I’ve seen it on my own face. It’s takes one to know one.

Here’s a list of why they are meant for each other, never mind that they are both married, they are both part of the same elite ruling class. They are even starting to look like each other..like Elvis and Pricilla.

When Obama got into office, he made Rice the Ambassador to the United Nations and made that position for the first time in history, a cabinet position, so that they could go into private meetings any old time they wanted to. What’s Michelle going to say? Probably…

“I’m leaving for Martha’s Vineyard NOW! I want that plane NOW!”

  • Rice ‘s father was a Cornell University Economics professor, and governor of the Federal Reserve
  • Rice’s mother is an education policy scholar currently at the Brookings institution.(Hillary’s think tank)
  • Rich’s brother got his MBA from Harvard Business School, and is the founder of Management Leadership for Tomorrow–an organization committed to developing top minority talent for leadership roles in the business and non-profit sector.
  • Rice attended Stanford University (Where Chelsea got her degree) and received a Truman Scholarship.
  • Rice, like Bill Clinton, was awarded a Rhodes Scholarship and attended Oxford, where she earned a M.Phil. (illuminati school for the up and coming rulers)
  • Madeline Albright has been a longtime friend. (As she has been to Condi Rice)
  • Rice was blamed for being the woman who told Bill Clinton to refuse bin Laden when he was offered up to us by the Sudan. She was central in that decision.
  • Clinton made her Assistant Secretary of State for African Affairs in 1997.  She visited Nigerian President Elect Basorun M.K.O. Abiola and he had a heart attack during the meeting and died.
  • Rice left the Brookings institution to serve as a senior foreign politic advisor to Obama.
  • Rice was named to the Obama-Biden Transition Project.  
  • Rice is a member of the Council on Foreign Relations and the Aspen Strategy Group
  • Rice played point guard in basketball in college. (Can you see why he built a basketball court?)

See? These two were MADE for each other.

Go ahead and find your own “Obama bimbo’s” We need to get working on this. Anything to get that man out of office.

Okay, so I’m silly. In fact, I’d say Obama would be a big disappointment to the democrats if he didn’t have an affair. Some three years ago, they put out a rumor that Hillary and Susan Rice…were gay.

And THAT’s my proof right there. Nobody Thinks it was a diversion to cut short rumors.

Hey? What? It’s not going to matter in the future..he’ll still get his statue  in the National Mall right next to Lincoln, no matter what.

So…go ahead and find your own “Obama bimbo.” And make sure EVERYBODY knows.

(Nobody Makes This Stuff Up Because Everybody Else Makes Stuff up.)  

 

[2

November 5, 2011 Posted by | corruption, Obama, sex scandals, Uncategorized | , , , , | 2 Comments

Ann Coulter Proves that THE DOCTORS are not Scientists

Nobody Wins

Recently, a brand new program to ‘educate’ Americans is gaining popularity here. It’s called The Doctors and this year the original four doctors have added a few more women…just what they DIDN’T need.

From left to right you have: A pediatrician, Jim Sears, a Dr. of psychology, Wendy Walsh, E.R. physician, Travis Stork, a ‘wellness expert’ Julian Michaels, OB/GYN Lisa Masterson, and plastic surgeon, Dr. Drew Ordon. They are here to save you, because they are experts.

This week they are talking about “sex.” And the guys, like all smart men everywhere, kept completely quiet. The women took off on their biggest tantrum ..single motherhood. And they went against the conservative heroine of wit, Ann Coulter— who has never backed down from a good fight.

Of course, that’s why they had her on…to fight.

The women “doctors” which consist of a gynecologist, a “wellness expert” and a psychiatrist all came from the same school: single mothers can raise a child and be a father, no questions asked.
Ann’s position: No way can mothers be fathers, period.

Someone with an online Social Work Degree  could attest to that.

Whoa…do not say that to women who have got degrees, are successful, and do not even want to wait around for some ‘father’. Jillian Michaels, was especially adamant that she had more money, more time, more love than many of the dysfunctional couples out there. She did NOT need a man. The new career women want that child, like they want those new shoes, and they can give it all they want they say. They have been brainwashed: women can have it all.

Idiots.

Now…the three men on the panel..said…nothing. Not a word. Not that the women would have let them talk. So, either they were told to shut up and let the feminist agenda of women raising babies on their own continue because they are making millions, and it’s the state’s agenda, OR…they secretly want to bed one or two of these beauties and don’t want to spoil their chances. Either way, THIS is why things won’t change. When good men say nothing. Where’s the TV program where men can say, “Hey, no woman is going to do what I can do?”

The real reason all these ladies threw such a hussy fit, (at least in Jullian’s case)  is because they secretly WANT a man but can’t find one, and for good reason. So, they have to say, “well women can do it all” just to make themselves feel better.

Ann was right. Statics show that 90 percent of jails are filled with men from single moms. As she said, it’s like some smokers can say “I never got lung cancer!” but most lung cancer is caused by smoking.
The other women never acknowledged Ann’s superior logic. BUT…the bachelor man (Travis) ended the fight and thanked Ann in such a way, that it was clear to this nobody, AND to Ann, that he was on her side.
Too bad he didn’t say it.

Wuss.

And to make matters worse, at the end of the show, Travis told us all about the endorphins caused in our brains from great sex, while smiling big about how much HE likes sex, and it’s just too bad, that he didn’t turn to all those empty womb feminist doctors, whose hormones were screaming night and day for a pregnancy—That: It’s okay girls…you feel bad because your hormones are controlling your brain. Let me help you out….the doc is in.

Nobody Wins when the feminists rule, and The DOCTORS keep silent.
Makes you really wonder…whatever they are teaching the doctors now, it sure isn’t how to use their own common sense.

September 15, 2011 Posted by | American Culture, Doctors, feminist, science | , , , | 7 Comments

   

%d bloggers like this: